How to Build Strong Business Relationships and Grow Your Network | RR360

Hi everyone, and welcome to this week's episode

of relationships rule. This week I'm joined by bad dad, Jamshidi,

someone who has built the business, built his business

around the power of connection in a very unique way. I'm going

to call him now by his familial name, B, because it's so much

easier for me to pronounce, even though I think it's interesting

to to deal with international names, and it's not always easy,

but we'll do it okay. So B is known for bringing the right

people together, helping business owners find the right

partners and building meaningful relationships that actually lead

to results. Today we're going to talk about what is real, what

what it really means to be a connector, how to build deeper

relationships in business, and why it's not about how many

people you know, but how well you know them. So welcome to the

show. Be having me. Janice, I'm excited to be here. Thank you. I

mean, that whole thing about connecting and and building

around curiosity, which we'll get into, it's it's just who I

am, too. And I was so excited when I met you to to hear your

take on it, because you talk in my language, and I love it. So

first of all, you described yourself as a connector. So what

does that really mean to you in the context of business?

Oh, I think this is this always just like,

evolves over time. But when I kind of, like, look at my

history, like, I've always been a connector. So if you looked

at, you know, being an engineer, a lot of my work at that time

was like connecting with C level executives, VP understanding

businesses, and then connecting those businesses to technology

solutions, like, how do you bridge the gap? But while doing

that, there's other ways that the connection piece showed up,

where I started running events and started finding people that

had similar values and goals and just like they had a certain

type of energy, and I bring them into networking events, and at

the end of networking events, people go, I hate networking in

Vancouver, typically, but there's something about this

room that, like, every single person I talked to was cool, and

it's like, looking back now, it's like, oh, that's kind of

like my skill set was just like spotting people and being like,

Oh, you'd be really great in a room, and you have great

conversations, and you create a certain energy. But I think the

connection piece just comes in terms of, for me, it's kind of

who I am, and I just love connecting with people, finding

bridges and gaps and putting the right people in the right same

room.

So there's such a dichotomy between engineer and

and people connector. Okay, so did you? I'm just surmising that

when you grew up, you had to your parents encouraged you

wanted you to get a degree in some sort, and probably

something very professional, and you fell into engineering that

way. But maybe that isn't the true you Yeah,

yeah, you read it, right? So, like, I want to

do engineering because, I mean, as you know, with immigrant

parents, doctor, lawyer, engineer, that's all you got.

And I don't want to read a bunch of papers. So lawyers out. I

didn't want to spend, you know, 15 years becoming a doctor. So

engineer seemed like the most, most simplified path. So when I

did that, I mean, when I went through engineering, a lot of

it, I didn't really enjoy until I kind of went to an open house,

and the open house was like, oh, there's a there's a role as a

sales engineer. What? There's a role? Or, like, all I got to do

is talk to people, understand them, and then, like, bridge

gaps, and it's part of understanding. I was like, that

was cool. So I did that. And as I did that, I mean, you know the

history of that a little bit as a sales engineer, but when I

started building my business, my core business, right now on the

side, which is essentially, I connect businesses to the right

marketing agencies, that kind of started out with me building

like websites, Google ads, SEO, realizing I hated 80 hour

websites. It was just not fun. So I started passing work off to

marketing agencies, and realizing most marketing

agencies didn't understand business, and most businesses

didn't understand so there's always a gap. And I thought I

could fill this gap with finding, you know, 10 marketing

agencies, and I'll solve all the businesses problems. Little that

I know that it's going to even to this day, I've talked to over

1156 different marketing agencies and experts, and work

with less than 11% in a vetted network. And I built a business

literally around understanding businesses, seeing what they

need, and then connecting them to the right marketing agencies

and partners. And so this whole connection thing. Now, as I

reflected, I'm like, Oh, I think this is my superpower. Like,

yeah, interesting. And I started diving into it and thinking

about, well, how do I build deep connections? Because, like, some

of the relationships I built are 14 layers deep, like, I had to

go through meeting 13 different people across the team, yeah, at

any point if one person in that chain was like, I don't like I

don't like beta. I'm not introducing him to the next

person I want to introduce him to. I wanted to met that 14th

person, right? And so I started kind of like reverse

engineering, like, how do you how do I build deep

relationships with people really, really fast? Because a

lot of these people I've only talked to for 30 minutes, but

the door is open to give them things or to. To ask for things

or say, Hey, I have another connection for you down the

road. So how do you build those deep connections in less than 10

minutes? Was really what I was trying to figure out.

Excuse me. Okay, so let's start with you talk

about three types of connectors. Can you walk us through those

and help us understand where people might fit in?

Yeah, so specifically around like super

connectors. So as you kind of get into this world, I didn't

know there was, like these super connectors, and if they existed.

Now, I get called that, which is kind of strange to me, but when

you build enough relationship that happens. So I think there's

three different types of super connectors. First off, you'll

meet super connectors that are what I call the transactional

super connector, essentially someone who has a really big

network, meets another person that also has another big

network, and they go, Hey, how do our networks come together so

that we can both win? Essentially, that's one kind of

super connector another type of consider it like a magnetic

super connector. These are people that super connecting is

not their main thing. Their main thing, though, attracts people

to them. So for example, if someone runs events, they're

just naturally going to know a lot of people right. People are

going to introduce them into the events. Or someone that has,

let's say I have a super connector friend of mine who's

just brilliant brain wise, like, he builds up models and things

like that. Like, so easily you tell them what you do, and he's

just really good at building out mental models. And people

introduce him as, hey, you need to go meet Michael, because

Michael's a genius, and I think you just need to talk to him.

And so he's got Michael that we were talking

about Exactly, yeah, okay.

And then I think you have their third type

of super connector, which I think is like the intuitive

super connector. This is someone who, like, at their core, just

loves connecting with people, connecting people together,

their brain just works this way. And I think super connectors

have a little bit of each one, but I think one is going to be

the most dominant.

Okay. It made me think, when you were talking of,

you know that the gosh, I was just talking about this, I don't

know if it was to you last time we talked or to somebody else

about the initial Harvard study that was done many, many years

ago, right for six degrees of separation, because it's never

six degrees. And you called those super connectors. They

called the hub. Those are the people that the message had to

pass through, and you could do it much faster than six degrees.

So those super connectors are the hubs, right? I love that you

said that curiosity plays a big role in how you connect with

people. How has that shaped the way you build relationships?

Yeah, I think curiosity in two ways. One is, I

think you need to understand yourself first to really be able

to connect deeper with others. If you can't connect deeply with

who you are, it's really hard to connect deeply with who other

people are. So I think curiosity, what the way that it

plays into it is one being super curious about me and getting to

learn myself more, and getting deeper and understanding that

more. And when you do that, it just opens up this whole other

curiosity about other people. Because you're like, I know how

complicated I am internally, and I know the person. And

typically, you know when you know, when you see people,

you're like, there's not a lot going on, but you're like, No,

like, the same thing that's going on in here is going on in

there, right? And so when you come in with curiosity about

learning about other people, what they like, who they are,

what they got, it just builds this, like, deeper sense of

connection with people, because you get to understand, like they

feel seen. And that ability to be seen by someone is such a

deep connection

point, right? Absolutely yes. And I think

sometimes I guess I'm more of the intuitive type, because I

will ask someone a question, and they'll go, Wow, no one's ever

asked me that before, or, wow, that's a great question. How did

you you know? So I think that comes from my intuition when I'm

around somebody, and I love that, because they like you,

said they feel seen and heard. And the best compliment, I think

we talked about this, the best compliment when you're at an

event or something and you're about to leave and the person

says, that was the best conversation I've ever had.

Thanks so much, and you've said nothing that you've just asked

them a question they talked about themselves the entire

time, which is what you you want them to do, because you can

follow up with them and talk about what you do afterwards,

right? So, yeah, now you also said something at the beginning

about you didn't like networking events in Vancouver, yeah, talk

to me about that. Have it? Has anything changed? Or you created

some for yourself? I know that for me, I stopped going to them

during covid, and I don't think I've ever gone back. So I'm

curious to know, because I wouldn't mind being in person

time Vancouver,

Vancouver is tough. I don't know, like, it's

like I run my own events, and they took a lot of energy and a

lot of energy and a lot of work. It almost became a second

business like, you know, and I'm very intentional about the

events that I built. I talked to literally every single person

before they come. I make sure the food is really good at a

really high level, just because that's who I am, good people,

yeah, but I find, like most networking events that I've been

invited to in bank. Cougar are typically more transactional.

The room is not really thoughtfully curated, so it's a

mix of just a lot of different types of people. Yeah, so you

end up with, you know, talking to real estate agents, and then

insurance brokers, and then mortgage brokers, and then you

might meet one or two business owners that run, you know, you

know, 100 person teams, and it's just such a mix, whereas for me,

I just thought, Okay, well, can I create a room of people that I

really enjoy where it's like, you know, seven figure business

owners, or people that are doing 200k plus in profit, or someone

doing something super interesting, and underneath it

all, I want someone to be a well rounded person, like, I don't

want you to just come to the meeting or come to the dinner

and just all you can talk about is just business. Like, that's,

that's the devil, or yourself, yourself pass a conversation

back and forth. Like earlier, you were just saying, you know,

that guy said we had a great conversation. Yeah, you just

listened to me for 30 minutes. I'm like, yeah. I mean, that's

not how you build

a relationship, right? No, absolutely,

it'll probably be a transactional and down the

road, which is fine. I mean, each zone, but you want this,

like passing back and forth and the person to be curious in you,

and then vice versa. And you don't find that as much in the

in certain network events, if they're not curated. Well, true,

very true.

So do you are you thinking when you're talking to

someone or having a conversation with somebody who you can

introduce them to? Does that come up for you a lot in

converse, in when you're talking to someone or not?

It does? It does it comes up naturally for

me quite a bit. But it's like, I don't do it for everyone. That's

another thing. Like, as I've built my network, and as I built

my skill set, I've become more and more discerning, right?

Because it's, it's your brand, it's your name. Like making

introductions to people you don't you want to really get a

sense of people before you make intros. The thing for me,

though, is, like, when I meet someone that, like, I really

like and I like their mission and what they're doing, what

they're about, like, I will open up doors. Like, for me, it's

always thinking, like, who can I introduce into this person

that's going to help them get towards their goal? And vice

versa? Yes, right? Like, I make probably anywhere between 30 and

100 connections a week for people like, it just, there's a

lot, but it really just comes down to like, who I kind of

believe in, like, I think my, if I could say, like, my ultimate

form is I kind of see myself as someone that down even now I do

it, but even more down the road is, like, if I believe in a

mission and a cause and a person like, I just want to be able to

open doors through people that they would not be connected to

just because I built that those relationships that would be like

the ultimate form.

I think that's because you're a caring person.

Yeah, I think that that makes, that makes a lot of sense. All

right, you've met, you've created a system to manage

relationships using your CRM. Can you explain your roots,

trunks and branches model and how it works in practice? I love

this.

Yeah. I'd love to, yeah. So I have a whole

model around, like, amplified relationships, but how to build

deep connection with people? And a part of that is, once you

build those relationships, like, how do you apply energy to your

network? Right? Because you only have a certain amount of energy,

right? So the root and bloom model essentially starts out by

me thinking, Okay, how do I incorporate my business and my

personal life together? Because I can't separate them, and where

do I apply most of my energy to? So there's seven layers. So we

start at layer one, which is the root of the tree, right? This is

the core of everything. And so these are the people that are

closest to you in life. This can be your immediate family. It can

be your best friends, you know, your top three best friends.

Yeah. Can be on the business side, your top five employee,

top five customers, your VIP customers, or your top five

vendors and referrals. And so these are people that are

sitting at your root level. And typically, you want to apply a

lot of energy to these people daily, weekly. You're talking

and you're in top deck with this part of their network. You move

one level up, and you start getting into the trunk of the

tree, right? So this is like the next layer of relationships that

you have. These are people like your not your immediate family,

but the next closest to, I'm forgetting the word in my head,

but your extended family, that's what I'm looking for, okay? And

then this could be like your good friends. This could be your

next level of customers and your next level of employees in your

company. Your company, right? So the next five, for example,

right? And typically you want to apply, you know, weekly energy

or monthly energy to this group, and you would do it in different

forms, right? Like so for the roots and the trunks, your phone

calls, text messaging, that type of stuff. As you move down the

layers, you start getting into branches. And so these are kind

of like, the relationships you want to grow over time, they

have the potential to become trunks. And so these are, like,

your good friends. These are your next, your next layer of

customers that could potentially be your highest level customer,

or your employees that could potentially become leadership

role type employees. And these are people that you'll keep in

contact with, but not you know, it'll be weekly, monthly, type,

type of frequency, and then you move into buds, which are

basically relationships you want to build. These are people that

you don't know yet, or JV partnerships you want to have,

or maybe significant others, or spouses that you want to have as

a spouse in the future. So you have your mind on, okay, how do

I build a relationship with this person? And you might be doing

that through like commenting on their Instagram or. A Facebook

or their Tiktok, or following their newsletter and sending

them email like, an email back every now and then to respond so

they get to know you a little bit more. Or you literally go to

an event to meet the person, which I've done multiple times

for very important people that I wanted to build connections

with. And you

knew they were going to be there and they were

going to be

there, yeah, yeah. And those, like, some of

those relationships, are the reasons why I've gotten on

stages to talk about my concepts and my talks. Also reasons why

I've been introduced into certain people I've never been

introduced into, right? It's, it's very like strategic, but

also like, you know that this you align, you can help them.

They can help you, that type of thing. Once you kind of move

past that, you get into, like the wildflowers. So these are

all like, the things, the in the grass planes, and these are the

relationships that you have loose strong connections with.

It's not people that you're going to talk to daily or weekly

or monthly. It's just people that you have in your network

and and you're just aware of them, and if they respond back

to you, you're happy to answer them back and vice versa. So

this is where most of your network sits, like I have 1000s

of people in this part of my network right underneath that,

you kind of have what I call the underbrush. And so that's kind

of like the next layer. These are people that are

transactional. You want you don't want to put a lot of time

into, but they're not on your like your your final list.

They're people that you'll still kind of respond to, but you

won't give a lot of time to right and then finally, have

your thorns. These are people that have either wronged you,

you don't align. These are just people that you want to stay

away from and not have any communication with. So this is

kind of how I built out my CRM and my model.

That took a lot of work. I bet it did. I mean,

you got 12,000 connections on LinkedIn alone. So yes, yeah,

but that's good, because I just just a little aside. I think I

asked you this, when was the last time you exported your

connections from LinkedIn? Because you definitely want to

do that every once in a while, in case something, God forbid,

happens. However, it's also a good place to look, to start to

look at those different levels, from the roots on up, of the

relationships. And you can start to sort that's that's awesome.

Thanks for sharing that many people, though struggle now to

stay connected and stay in touch consistently. So what are some

you mentioned a couple? What are some simple ways business owners

can nurture relationships without it feeling overwhelming?

Yeah, so, okay, just small things, like pings,

right? Like, so a friend of mine and a lot of like, friends talk

about, like, how they just leave little voice notes for people,

right? Like, hey, you crossed my mind. Blah, blah, blah, here's

this thing. Or, hey, you recommended a book to me. I read

it. Thank you so much. There's a thing that took away, just like

little pings to people, so that you stay in contact and

connection, right? One of the my favorite ways is to run events

or little dinners, right? So there's a lot of people who want

to meet and chat and meet one on one. I don't have that much

time. Yeah, right. So I will put on events where everyone ends up

in one place, right? And bring people towards me, or just,

like, just jumping on a call, like, anytime that I'm going

from one location to another location, I'll just call someone

for 15 minutes and just say, hey, just checking it got 15

minutes, you put a time limit to it so it doesn't have to go too

long either. And you just connect with people in that way.

So you're one to pick up the phone then, yeah,

and do people how many? What percentage of people answer?

Ah, maybe one. I remember, or like the phone as

much these days. No, I love it, though. Because

we're going back, we have to keep doing it. We have to,

because we need that personal touch these days. Yeah, and

it's not like everyone. It's obviously people

in my root and my truck, right? Yes, so you're very intentional

about the people that you keep in touch with. Yeah, one of the

other small ways that I'm doing it now is like, I took the root

and bloom model, I put it into my CRM, and now every like,

three or four weeks, I'm sending emails to people within my

model. And there are emails that were like, Hey, I found a really

interesting article around life and how to think of this

perspective, or it's a business thing, or whatever it is. It's

just a mass way of hitting a lot of people at one time, and then

people respond with what resonates with them, plus the

things that they click on, like, Oh, they're still interested in

this. So I know in the future that, like, they'll take more of

those types of emails, for example,

okay, you mean they click on the article that

you send them, or something like that. Okay, yeah. The one thing

you haven't mentioned that, of course, is, in my world is

sending cards to people, and that can be systemized as well,

okay, just so that you're touching base on a regular

basis. So, you know, for, you know, five bucks a card done

automatically through, through this an online system, you can

send real cards in the mail. Okay, so for what, six touches,

let's say, during the year, it's cost you, you know, 30 bucks or

sorry, yeah, 30 bucks, and you never know what kind of return

that can have. Just that heartfelt touch can be worth

lots. So there's, there's that aspect as well. And as I said,

it can be pre programmed or systemized as well, which is

good to know. Yeah. So. So I often see people treating

platforms like LinkedIn. Oh yeah, this is good. I often see

people treating platforms like LinkedIn the same as other

social media. Somebody will say to me, you know, will I do? I

post three times a week, all on, on all the on all the platforms,

but they send the same thing out on all the platforms. What do

you think about that? Because I think that's a mistake in that

LinkedIn is a different animal. So I don't know what you take.

What you're taking.

My take is it depends on where you are in

business, right? Like, if you're if you're kind of, like,

starting out and you're like, you don't have the resources to

be able to, like, individually, look at each individual each

individual social channel and go, I need to, I need to post

something specific for each individual one. Just getting a

system where you can even post that many times. I think that's

step one. Once you get done step one, the next piece is, okay,

how can I now iterate on what I currently have to continuously

make it better, right? And so that's kind of like where my

thought is, like, obviously LinkedIn is different than

Instagram, which is different than Tiktok, yeah, too, yeah.

But if you don't have the resources to have, like,

specific resources to make sure you know exactly what the

LinkedIn algorithm wants, just get them out there and then

start iterating and figuring out which platform matters the most,

and then get really honed in. That's kind of like my thought

process. Well, I

am curious about taking that sort of question

around the the marketing agencies. Okay? Because I

sometimes will talk to my client, who will say they have a

marketing agency that does their their content for them. And I

say, what do they do that for? Well, they do it here, and they

send it out to everything, and the marketing agency should know

better, yeah? And someone who does the social media management

for a company that doesn't know the difference, that's what

drives me crazy.

Yeah, that part makes a lot of sense. I mean, if

you think about the social media agency front like, that's really

hard to find a good one, because they're really expensive. If

they do it really well. I know,

of course they are. But then do most of them

that you've looked at treat them all the same? Or do they have

people who focus on LinkedIn, social media and focus on, you

know, the others?

There's different levels. This is why

the agency space is so like crowded. So if you have a social

media agency saying, hey, we'll charge you 2500 or $3,000 a

month to do your social media, we'll do three posts a week and

etc, etc, you're just getting average level stuff. That's the

truth of it. If you're looking at someone to do like LinkedIn

at a really, really high level, it's going to probably cost you

eight to 13 grand a month on average, just to do LinkedIn

really, really well, because it's one aspect of it is the

content. The other aspect is, how do they actually boost those

posts? How do they engage? How they do all the other stuff? And

then there's a whole bunch of other great tactics that they

use to grow. And I've seen people in my influencer network

grow quite large doing that. But it's like, if you're building

$3,000 a month, you're getting an average level agency doing

average level stuff across all of stuff across all the

platforms. Once you start getting very specific and

focused, like if you want to just do YouTube, or you want to

just do or whatever, you're going to be paying a lot more

than that just for that individual channel to find those

expertise that people can actually help you grow. Because

if you think about it, scripting the videos, the cutting, the

testing, the amount of work that goes into doing social well is

really hard,

and it's a crap shoot at the best times, right?

That's why I come full circle again and do would rather talk

to people, right? And build connections and build

relationships. But, yeah, but I had to ask that, because that's

one of the things I come across that I find frightening,

actually, that you know the so they're hiring and pending

spending a lot of money to have somebody do their content, and

it's not specific to the platform. So yeah, thank you.

Thank you for that. You've also explored the science behind

human connection. What have you learned about why connection

matters so much, especially as we grow our businesses?

Yeah, so I mean, from there's so many

studies that are done on human connection at this point, things

down to like the Harvard study, which a lot of people have heard

of, where they followed like 728 different men over the course of

the last like, 80 years. And half were from, not half, but

400 ish were from the Boston area, and another, like 232 40

were from, like Harvard graduates. And they kind of

asked the question of, like, what allows people to live a

long and healthy life? And they found one of the key indicators

was just the depth of human connection. Like, it allowed you

to recover from disease faster, built you deeper connections.

You were more mentally resilient. You lived longer just

because you built human connection. And there's studies

done where it's literally as isolation moves up, your

mortality rate moves up. And there's other studies done from

like they followed 1234 heart attack patients, and the ones

that lived alone had a double. Occurrence rate of getting a

heart attack within six months than the ones that were

surrounded by others and felt connected. And there's so many

of these types of studies. So just in terms of like living a

long and healthy life, human connection is really important.

When it comes to business, I think everyone knows what it's

like to leave money on the table, like everyone gets that,

but I don't think people realize the number of opportunities they

leave on the table because they haven't built deep enough

relationships. That's big, yes, huge. And it's like, the the

type of opportunities I'm talking about are things that,

like, I could never have imagined that would happen for

me, right? Like, things like, I never knew that through building

human connections and relationships and building my

business, I'd be able to live internationally and visit 55

European cities and support my wife doing her master's in human

international rights law, like that's something I could never

imagine. Or getting into $50,000 rooms and not having to pay

$50,000 to get into those rooms, like I got in those rooms at no

cost. It's because of the relationships I've built. I'm

going to a very well known conference coming up, and those

tickets are $12,000 American. I got it for free just because of

the connections and the relationships that I had built

to do that. So there's, like, all this stuff that happens, and

like, even on the business fronts, from referrals and

people trusting and all that stuff, like, human connection is

the foundation of business. If you find one right connection at

the right time, it shifts the entire trajectory of your

business and try to do it yourself. So I have a lot of

faith for that.

So let me ask you this. Um, we met through an

introduction from David Holman, who is on my podcast,

orchestrated connections. And David talks about, gosh, I just

lost my brain. Just went out the window. David talks about asking

for what you want. So how does that fit into what you were just

talking about?

So you know, when you're on a call, almost at

every if someone's like intentional focus, relationship,

focus, typically, they'll ask you the question, How can I help

you? Yes, right? And most people don't know how to answer that

question, right? And a lot of people are afraid to answer that

question, because they're like, I'm asking for something, yes,

and they feel bad about it. My whole thing around that is, know

what you want, like, know what your goals are. This comes back

to self like, what's your goals? What's your life mission? What

are you trying to do? Because when people ask me, What do I

want? I go? Cool. I got two main things I'm focused on. One is

building out C jam and continuing anyone needing

marketing services and helping support them. That's one thing.

The second thing is I want to talk about amplified

relationships and how to build deep connection in less than 10

minutes. And I want to do that on stages and podcasts. So if

you know anything for that, great. Those are my two goals in

life. How easy is it for you to go, I have a podcast, or, Hey, I

have this thing, or have an intro for you, because you

actually know what I want, right? So I think you have to

put it out there. You got to know what you want, and then

people want to help, right? And, and the way

you just framed it, it doesn't feel self serving in right? It

doesn't and if you're talking to people who think the same way,

they get it right and so, okay, so if I may, and you don't have

to answer this, this conference that you're going to, that you

are going for free, tickets are $12,000 US. How did that come

about? Can you share that in a general way that isn't gonna you

know, yes, again.

So, so that's an example, yeah. It's an

example to show people, yeah. So, so, for example, I got

invited by another connector in the city to come to an event,

pre event for this event, and I went, and I was like, part of me

actually didn't want to go. I was kind of tired and stuff.

But, like, some intuition in me was like, Yeah, you

gotta go. And this was a free event.

This was a free event, yeah, it was just, like a

picture. It's invite only, various kinds of people. So I

went and, man, there was some amazing people in that room.

Like, so so many cool people. And then I got to meet the

director of community for this event. And I was like, cool,

like, maybe I can jump on a call with her and see, just learn

about what she does, what her goals are, what her like, what

where are they trying to head and as I did that, and we did

have that call, I was like, Okay, now I know what her goals

are. The goal is to fill the room with many amazing people as

possible. This is her target audience, which are

entrepreneurs that are doing 789, figures. And I know that I

used like working in the corporate space before, I didn't

have a lot of connections into the entrepreneurship community.

But now I do because of what I do, and like, I know a lot of

people that run a lot of communities that are literally

their target audience. So I went, Hey, I could probably help

here. And I know at least 10 to 15 names just off the top of my

head that I can make introductions to that likely one

of the people that are coming to the event, but they know they

have the entire audience of the people you want to come to it.

Would it be useful for me make those intros? And she's like,

Yeah, it would be. And I was like, great. Like, I can do

that. And then I've always wanted to go to this event. Is

there anything that, any way that I could join it? She's

like, there might be, if you're making these intros. And I.

Started highlighting, I had to meet with another director, also

understand her goals and their objectives and highlight things.

I got soft nose twice, and then a third one. She's like, No, you

know what? These people that you're introducing to us are

going to be really useful? And if you're giving us the strategy

on how to connect with them and how to think about the

relationship, we can 100% give you a ticket for free. And so it

was really just understanding them, their goals, where they're

headed, and being like, How can I add so much value that it's

worth it for you to have me at this event?

And you had already started to do that, you

had already started to introduce them, and they liked the people

they were talking to, exactly. Yeah, yeah, no, that's good.

That's good. But you also have to ask, right? If you don't ask,

you don't get so, you know? And took the third time lucky, so

that's good, yeah.

And being being told, No, like, soft nose, and

being like, I still think there's something here. The cool

part about that is, like I went in with it was like, if I got a

ticket out of this, that'd be super cool. And if I don't,

that's also totally okay. Yeah, I was still gonna go to LA for

another event anyways. So this is just means I stay in

Vancouver.

Very good. Thanks for sharing that, because it's,

it's, I always say, you know, my I think I grew up with my father

saying it's not what you know, it's who you know. And it just,

it sort of stayed with me from from then, yeah,

and I add one thing to that, yes, it's not

what you know, it's who you know, but also the depth of

relationships you've built

with them. Yes, because sometimes it's not what

you know, it's not even who you know, it's who they know. Yeah,

so you have to have that depth of relationship. So yeah,

absolutely makes sense. All right, for someone who's

listening, for someone listening, who already has a

network, but they're really not nurturing it, where should they

start?

Start with whatever you possibly can like

to start with the easy stuff. So if you're able to get, like, for

example, for me, I was getting everyone into my CRM, from

customers that didn't close with me to customers that have closed

with me to my network. And just like setting up a system to be

like, how do I stay in touch with these people once a month?

Could it be an email I send whatever feels good to you? Or

if you have, like, a smaller network and it's more quality,

then you can just go, I'm just going to text people once. I'm

going to spend Tuesday and Thursday morning 15 minutes. I'm

just going to ping people and then leave it at that, and then

move on with my day. You know, like, or even at the end of your

day, back when I used to work in corporate, every Friday I had

about 30 minutes I left aside to just thank people that have

helped me in the company, right? Just be like, hey, really

helpful that you helped me over the last two weeks of this, I

want to just really appreciate that, you know, little things,

it doesn't

have to be, I know large one of the things

that I that I practice, not as well as probably I I could. I

didn't say should, because I don't believe there's, there's a

should thing, but is what I call acting on your promptings,

because usually during a day, for some reason unknown,

somebody will come into my consciousness, which means I

need to send them a card, or I need to do something, pick up

the phone. Usually it's sending them a card, but and you just

put it out there into the universe. I mean, you don't have

any expectations in return, which I'm sure you're the same

with, with whatever you're doing. Do you notice that it

does bring more calls or brings them back into your

consciousness because they reply like, what percentage would

reply?

Almost everyone replies like, that's not really

the thing, and you're just on top of mind, like, that's really

what

exactly? Yeah, so

like, for me, my social media, like my social

media, is not done at the highest level where, like I'm

getting better at storytelling and practice like I'm having fun

with it, but it's because whenever I meet someone at a

networking event or whatever, like they're in my network, they

would follow me on Instagram or on Facebook, on LinkedIn. And

it's just a reminder, like, hey, B's doing this. This is what's

going on B's world, which is super cool, because when we jump

on a caller like B, I've been following you for like, last two

years and done this and done that, cool, we just start off

the conversation. So I don't have to, like, you know what I

mean, spend more time understanding that. And it's

that's kind of how I think

about it. Brilliant. I love it. I could

talk for hours, but I'm going to ask you a quick, I guess,

lightning round type questions, because I have my curiosity, and

then we'll call it a day. How do you best process information

these days? Do you read like? Do you read hardcover books? Or do

you listen? Or do you video watch like? What do you do most?

So, I mean, it's a

little bit of everything I read, I have a

business coach. So then, as I'm learning stuff, I use time to

get things processed, and then I talk to people like, the reason

why I connect with people like, I'll throw my perspective on

something, they'll pass it back, and then I'll, like, I

synthesize information from a lot of different places and then

bring it to one. And so it's a I use all the mediums I

possibly can. Do you read novels? Or you is it

all business related?

No, so I do read novels. I got into because,

like, I believe there's, like, these stories, and I want to get

better at storytelling. And like, I found reading those

novels one you're learning about life in a weird way, but you're

also enjoying the process. And so it's a mix of two. I do read

some business books and stuff like that, but it's just, it's

always. Kind of like it shifts depending on like what my mood

is, right?

So my podcast that just went out today, just

launched today, talks about telling storytelling, and it's a

wonderful one. I was just trying to find the name of the book.

Story intelligence is the name of her book, The craft of

authentic storytelling made smarter with AI. And she does

not use AI to tell the stories, but she's, she's really amazing.

And that would be a book that you might enjoy, because she,

she's an like the storytelling is so comes so easily to her,

and I find it really difficult. So this book was very helpful.

Oh, cool.

I opened up on my screen. Storytelling has

like, they all have their structures, and if you just

understand the few different structures, you can blend them

together.

Yeah, yeah. It's a someone who can tell a good

story, just they, they keep you so enthralled or so, right? It's

funny because now I'm thinking this gentleman I interviewed on

my podcast a couple of years ago, he's like a CSP, is that

what they're called? Like he's or he's American. So the highest

level of the speakers association where you have to,

it's like a two year process where you have to get paid X

amount of money for your speaking engagements for so

long, and you have to do all this anyway. He's one of those.

He's the highest level. And he was telling a story on my

podcast, and it was so it's just lovely to hear and to to how

well people can do that. It's an art. It's really hard.

I think stories hit people's emotions.

Of course, they do. Right? And like

people make emotional decisions, that's just

always all we do. So the better you get at storytelling, the

more you can actually move people towards the direction

that they they want to move towards. So when you look at the

greatest leaders in the world, what are they really good at

telling stories?

Yeah, it's for sure. And I love that you're

doing that, so I wish you well with it, and I'll be I'll be

watching, and listen, that's good. So thank you. Thank you

for being here today. And where can people find you?

The two places, so LinkedIn would be number one.

So bit of jam. Sheeny, if you look that up on there quite

often, my website, www, dot C, jam marketing.com, that's where

all my marketing stuff is, and I'll put those

in the show notes. So yeah, okay, we're

good. All right. So great conversation. Love your

perspective on relationships, especially the idea that it's

not just about meeting more people, but about going deeper

with the ones we already know. And for those listening, I hope

this inspires you to take a closer look at your own network

and think about how you can stay connected and be more

intentional in your relationships. Thank you so

much. Bea for being here. Thanks for having me. Bye.