Finding Your Beat Again: Rebuilding Hope and Purpose After Injury with Dori Staehle

Welcome to Brain Health and Healing. I'm Sandra

Lee. This show is for people living with head injuries and

the families and supporters who love them. If you are ready to

reclaim your life, identity, and dreams for the future, you are

in the right place. Welcome to Brain Health and Healing,

Receiving Adversity's Gifts. Today, I have a really wonderful

guest for you. I love talking about brain injuries, accidents,

you know, strokes, all the things, and how to heal from

them, and when I have a guest who both has that experience and

then takes that experience and uses what they learned,

experience they had, to turn it into how they serve the world.

That's really what the show is about: receiving adversity's

gifts, taking the things that happened to you and turning it

into magic that contributes to other people. Our guest today is

one such person, and she does something that's really unusual

and special. So please meet Dori Staehle. She does drumming that

helps people heal. Welcome to Brain Health and Healing, Dori.

Thanks so much, Sandra. Glad to be here.

So, start off by sharing your story, which is

really amazing.

Well, you know, you just never know how your

gifts or a fun hobby will serve you and others later in life,

and for me, it happened completely by accident.

Actually, a real accident. I was run over by a speeding bicyclist

in a crowd of 200 people. Oh yes, folks, I was the only one

hit. At first, I thought, Well, I should be fine. I know I felt

pain, and and I twisted on the way down, and and things started

swelling up right away. I I didn't realize that what I had

was a concussion and whiplash right away because the young man

eventually did come back and ask me if I was okay, and I began to

ask him questions that had nothing to do with anything. I

did not know that was the sign of a concussion until much

later. And so, we were I was at a work event. I had a day job in

sales and marketing. We were entertaining clients, standing

outside, serving refreshments, drinks and snacks for them and

their families. I had no idea that some kid would try to fly

right through the crowd. I don't know what he was thinking, but,

he just sped through, took me out, and it caused, many, many

different injuries and issues even much later. So at first, I

didn't think I was severely injured until gradually it

became apparent that, oh my goodness, Houston, we have a

problem. And none of the doctors could figure it out. I figured

that there had to be a connection between all the

different crazy symptoms. There had to be a connection. And I

told them, the main thing is the shooting tailbone pain. Couldn't

figure that one out. They had taken X-rays, and they knew I

had tears in my shoulder, knee, ankle, but nobody knew the

serious injuries in my back because guess what? They took

X-rays of the wrong part. How about that? So in their mind, I

was totally fine. They'd do the upper back instead of the lower.

Anyway, long story short, I couldn't really function

normally. Brain fog, numbness, range-of-motion issues, ADHD to

the max, which, you know, I've always had a little bit of it,

but this was like, wow. I just wasn't the same, and I couldn't

function in my two part-time businesses. I figured after I

left the job after three months, gave them back the keys to the

company car, the company credit card, all that. I got paid to

speak and travel up and down the East Coast. It was a lot of fun.

And I brought on a lot of clients that way. And I thought

I would be continuing, but God had other plans, apparently. So

I went home, and I thought, I'll just be home for two weeks, and

I'll just try to boost my two part-time businesses that I had

all along, and I'll make them full-time. I'm going to heal.

I'm going to be fine. But it just kept getting progressively

worse. And, as I mentioned, nobody knew why. So after a

year, that's when I found out I had a concussion and whiplash.

That would have been nice to know early on. I wouldn't have

done so many things that you're not supposed to do when you have

a concussion. And also, I discovered three years after the

fact, when the pain got too intense, I asked for an MRI, and

I discovered that I had a rare neurological degenerative

disease. There is no cure. And that's when I realized, great,

the accident triggered all of these things and this rare thing

that that only two doctors in the US know how to treat. So my

prognosis looked pretty bleak. And that's when I started to

give up hope, which is very unusual for me, because anybody

who knows me knows I've got a lot of energy, I'm very

creative. On LinkedIn, I call myself the chief encouragement

officer as one of my titles. And I just never thought I would go

there. But sometimes when you get hit by something totally

from left field—it doesn't have to be a speeding bicyclist; it

could be anything that unexpected—that totally threw

you, your business, your career, or your life totally for a loop.

That is a very, very common experience that people

have when they have a serious brain injury: losing hope. So,

what did you do to get through that to the other side?

I decided to take control of things, cuz I

figured, okay, if the doctors can't figure this out and they

keep dismissing me and telling me, Oh, this is all in your

head. No, it's in seven different body parts. What are

you missing? And the doctors, you know, they weren't all on

board cuz it was a different set of doctors for different things,

and I thought, man, this is driving me nuts. So, one of the

doctors, who was very snarky, by the way, gave me a hard time one

day, and he said, So you're in pain 24/7? I said, Yeah, pretty

much. He says, When are you not in pain? I said, You know, I

thought for a minute and responded, It doesn't hurt when

I drum. Never thought of why, and he didn't ask me any

questions. But as I walked out of the office to my car, I

thought, Why doesn't it hurt when I drum? And I realized it

did hurt when I stood and played percussion in the church band.

I'm self-taught. I play by ear, and I started at age 47. I'm a

late bloomer. No lessons, no experience. I passed the

audition. I was playing with them for some time, but I knew

that standing up and playing bongos up here, congas, and

reaching was jacking up my shoulder and things. So, I took

a break from the band for a little bit. But when I sat and

drummed with people for my events and my my sessions and

things, I wasn't thinking about me. So, of course, I wasn't

focused on the pain. I was focused on the clients, the

participants, and giving them the the healing vibes and good

vibrations for what we were doing. So, no, when I sat down

in a chair and drummed—I always brought a little cushion—it

really I didn't focus on the pain, so it didn't hurt. Then I

realized, well, let's take this one step further. So, as a

person of faith, I realized I have no other options here. I

didn't want to take all the prescriptions that they were

providing cuz, you know, I just don't. I don't respond very well

to to prescription drugs to begin with, and the surgeries,

they they may or may not have really improved, especially the

invasive procedure on my spine. I'm told the cysts could have

grown back. There's a very high incidence of that. Shoulder

surgery, I was told that I would have three months of downtime,

and I may never be able to drum the same way again, if at all.

That's when you get real. And that's when I asked God, Look,

what do you got? I got nothing. So, give me a way to heal myself

and heal others. I didn't want it to be just about me, so that

I can move forward, cuz I cannot go on this way. It's been three

long years, too much pain, and and I need a I need something

else.

It's extraordinary. A couple of things I'm thinking:

one, that you really didn't get treatment that was effective in

any way. Like they tried to do like you like there was nothing

wrong with you, which is like clearly not true.

Yeah.

And then when they told you that there was nothing

that they could do, and you didn't listen, You found your

own way. That's

right.

And that I love that.

Yeah, well, it's interesting because they did

offer physical therapy straight out of the gate, Sandra. They

hadn't even gotten any X-rays yet. You shouldn't be working on

somebody unless you know. And that made it worse, so I stopped

that. I did try chiropractic. That was a tough sell. My body

responds to chiropractic. Finally, the the insurance

company agreed, and that did help to a point, but that's when

the chiropractor said, You've reached MMI, maximum medical

improvement. This is about as good as it's going to get. This

is all you can hope for, so you just have to accept it. And I

And I said, I'm sorry. I don't accept that diagnosis.

Did the chiropractor at least identify that you had

the back injury?

Oh, they knew it. Yeah, they they did like an

infrared scan, and yeah. The the scan really showed that I had

massive issues going on, and it wasn't in my head. So, at least

they got it, and the hole-crackers they were being

very nice, and and helping with with the treatments. But, yeah,

after a while, you realize this is not good. They didn't know

about the MRI yet. But, yeah, once you get that diagnosis and

you thought, Well, great.

Okay, now I want you to share about bringing the

drums in.

Yes. So, as a person of faith and somebody who

has played drums and percussion for a while now, I figured,

Well, let me ask God what what can I use? And the answer I got

back as clear as day is, Dori, open your eyes. I already did.

Use the drums. He already gave me the answer. They were

literally right in front of me. I had a lineup of djembe drums

like this. This is a little one, and I have some big ones, and

things. I never thought of using them for me. How crazy is that,

right? So, sometimes, folks, the answer that you need or the

person that you need is right in front of you the whole time. You

just have to open your eyes and embrace different possibilities.

And sometimes they might be really, really different. And so

drumming to help with physical issues, it didn't really dawn on

me, even though I had seen some amazing things when I worked

with other people, even after just one session or event. But I

kind of dismissed it and said, Oh, that's just a coincidence,

or, There's science behind this. It's just the sound waves.

Anybody can do this. But that wasn't the case.

I want to interrupt you for a second,

Sure.

and give a point to the audience. Okay, so this is a

practical thing.

Yes.

When you are in a place of not knowing what to do

and not sure what to direct, it's like, do what Dori did. Ask

God, What do you have for me?

and

then to realize that sometimes the answer might be

right in front of you and you haven't been seeing it.

Exactly.

Does that really turn things around when you do

that?

Oh, it totally did. What I did was I was in my

home office and I just took one of these types of hand drums,

although it was a bigger one, and I just drummed. And it just

flowed. And sometimes, I have to admit, they were angry beats

because I was angry at the doctors and the insurance

companies. But I'm telling you, folks, hitting a drum is a great

release because it feels really good. You can't hurt the drum.

Might hurt your hands if you hit too hard, but I didn't. So, I

just was hitting it, bam, bam, bam. And then I did that

everyday for two weeks, 15 to 20 minutes, and I also, in that

amount of time, took a Native American buffalo drum that I

don't have here, unfortunately. I have my drums stored somewhere

else because I I take them with me for things. And I it was

round, and it had a mallet, and it has really deep vibrations,

really easy to play, too. So I just went wherever the tears

were, and the the cysts all over my spine, I just took the drum

and went doom doom doom with the mallet, put it right over the

shoulder, knee, ankle, back, doom doom doom. Again, the

whole process, 15 to 20 minutes of drumming, I was saying

affirmations, though, at the same time to fill my brain with

positive sayings, phrases, Bible verses, whatever I could think

of, because I wanted to shift my brain from a very negative state

to a very positive one. I wanted to go from feeling hopeless to

feeling hopeful. And that's what I did. I drummed, and I said

things like, I'm going to be fine. The cysts are going away.

I'm going to rise up and rock. And that became the title of my

most recent book. I wanted to help others do the same. When

life throws you a curve ball and you get knocked down, you have a

you can either stay down, or you can choose to get

up. And I got up and kept going and kept on rocking.

That's extraordinary. So you took the

frequencies coming from the drum, and then the powerful

intentions that you set, and then you brought in the energy

of God and you put that into your body. And you know, I tell

people, you tell your body, you tell your brain what you want it

to do.

Yeah.

You told it, This is the healing that I want. This is

the person who I want to be. This is the experience I want to

have, and you used the drum to put those frequencies into your

body.

Yeah, that and also I was given specific

instructions to drumming in different ways that I had never

drummed before. But that helped as well, so there's a lot of

different hand movements, and I carry that forward. So I develop

programs for people with different issues, and I'll use

some different things, and I'll say, Just keep in mind, I don't

normally play this way when I play with a band, but we're

going to do this today because this is going to help sync up

the left and right hemispheres of your brain, so you can focus

better, for example. Or this beat is going to help you

literally sweep away stress and shift your mindset, cuz if you

change your beat, you can shift your mindset and change your

life.

So you're starting to talk about your work with

other people. Tell us more about that.

Sure. In the beginning, I knew that I had

gone through training with an organization known as Drums and

Disabilities before I accepted this this sales job, which, by

the way, I wasn't even looking for work. I just went to a

dinner and I was offered a job based on my experience. And so I

already had that training, but I didn't use it because of the

job. But after the job, I thought, Okay, this is great.

I'm going to be using drum therapy, it's called. This is

trademarked, by the way, by the founder of the organization

Drums and Disabilities, and I'll be working with kids with ADHD

issues. Because business number one was educational consulting

and private tutoring. I got a lot of kids with ADHD symptoms,

but I found that there were a lot of underlying issues that

were triggering the symptoms that could easily be switched up

by a few changes. Drumming was one of them, but I also did some

coaching and and I had referral partners and things, so it was a

whole comprehensive program. Little did I know that people

would start asking me, Dori, can this also be used for people

with autism? I thought, I bet you it can. So I've done a lot

of research, folks. I have an evidence-based approach. I've

tested out a lot of different things to make sure that what

I'm doing is is highly effective. I switch things up if

if the child or the adult needs something different, so it's a

whole interactive, experimental type of process. But I do know

that my success rate is now 93% in eight sessions or less

because I'm tracking everything. So yeah, loads of fun, easy to

do, and it works really fast.

Do you have a gift for the audience?

Sure, I always tell people feel free to sign up

for a free 30-minute call to get your questions answered to see

if this is something that can help for you, because I do way

more than help with anxiety well, ADHD and autism. I also

help people with anxiety, stress, and just lots of other

issues. So we talk, I ask, you know, What's going on with you?

and offer different suggestions. If drum therapy isn't their

thing, that's okay. I've got lots of people, so I recommend

other types of practices that might be more beneficial for

them or just something they're they're more comfortable with.

But a lot of people really do want to experience the the fun

and the healing power of drumming, especially when I tell

them you don't need any drumming experience, you don't need to

know how to drum at all. Most of the people I've worked with have

never touched a drum. If you can count, you can drum. You're

following my beats, we're taking deep breaths, we're saying

affirmations, and it's it's very very easy to do. So yeah, they

can get the 30-minute free call, or I can do a free virtual

mini-session if you like. I'll have a drum on my end and I'll

guide you through a few things to show you this the types of

exercises I do. This is what a session is like. It's like a a

workout, basically. You have a warm-up portion of the program,

some more challenging, specific, targeted exercises in the middle

for that person or the organization, because I also do

a virtual corporate wellness, and then we have a cool-down at

the end. We might jam a bit, and we always close out with a

rockin tune. I take requests. It's got to be clean, it's got

to have a good beat, otherwise I'll pull out something from my

playlist and I'll teach them how to play along with me. It's

loads of fun. That way, they're leaving on a very positive note.

They have clarity, they have confidence, and they they now

know that they can do this on their own anytime, even if

they're done with me after their eight sessions.

Sounds wonderful. So, if you want to connect with

Dori, check the show notes. All the information for connecting

with her is there. So, tell us now about your books.

Sure. I have two books on Amazon. The first book

I wrote just to get information that was in my brain out and and

somewhere that people can benefit for, because I knew I

was closing those two part-time businesses. So, the first one

was Next Stage Educational Services, worked that for about

20 years with that one. And the next one that I did at the same

time, while homeschooling, because, you know, why not? was

called Next Stage Entertainment. Did that one for about 18 years.

I found, groomed, and booked over 900 local young bands and

solo artists. Again, no experience, I just jumped in. I

knew our kids needed a booking agent and a manager, and I

learned an awful lot about the music business along the way,

and I was always passing that along to my young clients

because I didn't want them to get ripped off. They call me

Mama Dori for a reason. I watched their backs. And I

guided them because I said, at some point, you're going to go

off and you know, book your own shows and and people are going

to approach you, and and you need to know a few things. So I

put a lot of marketing tips in there, not just for musicians. A

lot of entrepreneurs bought my book too because I had a lot of

marketing, mindset. I had information about my ADHD theory

called The Gifted ADHD Connection. I'm going to add

autism to that. It's all connected. And they just got a

lot of great advice and tips, so it's like a coaching program in

a book. The second one, the more recent one, is Rise Up and Rock:

Activating Your God-Given Purpose. That one is way more

Christian than the first, so if you're offended by Bible verses

or you know, some talk about the Holy Spirit, either ignore it or

this might not be the book for you. But and that one, I didn't

want it to be just about me and and just a bunch of tips. I

wanted to share stories of people that either I know or

I've worked with. Lots of women who, like me, rose up against

all odds to create a business doing something that they loved,

and in most cases, it was from a hobby. They never thought about

it, but you know, one got laid off, you know, one just needed,

she had a cancer diagnosis, and she just did something creative

for therapy, and found out, Well, a lot of people are asking

me, you know, to buy these things. So you just never know.

So yeah, that one has an awful lot of tips. They're both like

workbooks because there's a lot of fill-in-the-blanks and things

like that. But just two different books to help people

move forward, get unstuck, and finally check that item off your

bucket list and just do it. You know, if I can do it at a right

at an older age, severely injured, and by the way, I was

totally tapped out financially. If I can do it, so can you. You

just have to, you know, have some faith, trust God, use your

gifts in different ways, perhaps, think outside the box,

and you never know what can happen.

What a great message about how to take adversity and

turn it into a gift. Now, let's look at the big picture. I want

you to imagine yourself far in the future, making a real big

contribution. What is it you're doing? Well, you

know, it- I've been doing this for about 14

years now, combining it with different things. So it's been-

it's been a minute, right? And I'm I'm pushing 70. I believe it

or not, there we go. I have three grandkids, so I would like

to eventually stop hauling drums all over creation. And I would

like to have a drum ministry where people can come to me,

regardless of income, and I can say, Don't worry, I've got you.

Grant money, sponsorships- I don't care. I've I've done it

before on on occasion. I've worked with at-risk populations.

I've done virtual train-the-trainer programs for

an organization that deals with victims of human trafficking and

abuse. So, that's how I'd like to give back.

That's wonderful. So, here's the last question.

What's the coherent point that you wish the audience to

remember?

I would like them to remember that no matter how

old you are, you can still rise up and do something you love,

because you're never too old and it's never too late to rock what

you got. Drum roll, please. You know, if I can do it, so can

you. Again, I had no experience. I just auditioned for a church

band on a whim and I passed the audition somehow. Just called

the drummer. Apparently, I have a good ear and a good sense of

rhythm. It was in my body my whole life, even as a kid, so it

just needed to come out. So, maybe there's something inside

of you that you're either hiding, or maybe you put it on a

shelf, or you convinced yourself, Nah, I can't do it.

Hey, maybe it's time to give it a try. What do you got to lose,

right? Same with me with the audition. I figured what's the

worst thing that can happen? They can say, Don't call us,

we'll call you, right? You're right. Give us a little bit more

drum before you go. Sure. Yeah, people, you can do this on your

legs or your desk, or if you have a hardcover book handy, you

can drum on that. You can tap on anything really, but having one

of these- and by the way, my private clients get one shipped

to their house in the color of their choice, because I can. You

can just take some deep breaths and just do two quick beats. You

can count to two, right? It's called the heartbeat. Two beats

anywhere where you are, one hand, two hands, it doesn't

matter. Just close your eyes and just get in the zone, and no

matter what's been stressing you out, we're going to let it go.

Ready? Two beats. Take some deep breaths. Get in the zone. Tell

yourself, I expect good things to happen. I can use my gifts to

bless others. I used to do this with my tutoring students. Great

for test anxiety or if you're going into an interview or you

have to do a presentation. You do this one on your legs. You

can do it in your car even before you head in. Or for the

kids, do it at your desk. Teacher will just think they're

hyper. So, just to give you an idea, again, I always joke, if

you can tell like you can drum and drummers can only count to

eight. Not true, but yes. I usually don't make things very

challenging or complicated. So, no worries, anybody can do this.

I work with ages 4 to 100, so if they can do it, so can you.

Thank you so much for being here for Brain Health

and Healing, Dori.

My pleasure. Thanks so much for having me.

And everybody who's out there, keep the faith, my friends, keep

on rocking, and God bless. Muah.

See you again next time. Thank you, everybody.

Wasn't it wonderful hearing Dori's story of having that

brain and spinal injury and then healing herself with drumming

and now contributing to other people with that gift? You know,

we talk here at Brain Health and Healing about taking the

adversity, whatever it is that God and life bring you, and

turning it into a contribution. How is it that you serve through

the adversity that you have had? It was wonderful to have Dori's

perfect example of that today. So connect with Dori and with

you know receiving the gifts that she offers, and then what

value are you taking for yourself? What gem came from

today that you can write down in your notes and then use to serve

yourself? What did you learn today? Go to the Brain Health

and Healing Facebook page and give me some thoughts about what

you learned today, what you valued or appreciated about the

show and meeting Dori. Thank you, and I will see you next

time. This is Sondra Lee with Brain Health and Healing.