I Will with Aron O’Dowd

Welcome back to Your Brain On Positive. All the love and support you need is residing inside of you. And we're going to make it easier to turn it on.

Welcome to your brain on positive. I'm Jackie Semmens, your host and I am positive that you are going to want to pay attention lean in get something to take some notes on, because we are going to tackle that word that positive psychologists go. No, don't use the word no. And of course, they use the word no, when they say no. The reality is there are ways to say no, that can absolutely stop a conversation and destroy a relationship. And then there are other ways and we're going to be exploring those other ways. Today with my friend Aaron doubt. Aaron, welcome. And I forgot that Oh, I didn't say oh. Oh, that. Okay, so Oh my goodness. There we go.

Hello. Welcome, Jackie. It's a pleasure to be on your podcast with all the amazing guests you've had so far to the pleasure. Ah,

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Alright, let's let's go in the Wayback Machine, give these people a little bit of an introduction to who you are now and where you came from.

Oh, so I'm Irish lives. Now living in Spain. I've traveled the world lived in America, Asia with my family. I've had 14 years of experience in the sport world in the adaptive world of sport. From rowing in 2007 to now triathlon, starting in 2019. To up to now and background in massage background in energy therapy, love technology, food, and that's me, Jackie.

love technology and food and that to me, okay, so we'll unpack some of this. Um, now I traveled a little bit growing up, because I'm an Army brat. What was behind all the travel when you were growing

up? My dad worked for Dell computers back in the 90s. So we moved to Austin, Texas for six years and then Taiwan for two years and then came back to Orleans.

Wow. Okay. So from Ireland to Austin, Texas is a huge culture shock.

Oh, it is when you're at the age of seven and just found OSHA two or three months before that you have a visual impairment? Wow. It's a it's a real mind boggling, you know?

So So you were dealing with a couple of paradigm shifts at the same time? Definitely. Okay, so the world is you expected it is not what you ended up living. And that's a pretty rude awakening at the age of seven.

It is, you know, we're all children, like all this is whatever. But when you're told no, you can't do this. No, you can't do that over the space of, you know, 24 years, it becomes like, I'm gonna say yes, I'm gonna do this. And that's kind of my life in some way. You know?

So, we're living in the land of No, because of conditions beyond your control, to now living in a land of Yes, I can. Yes, I am. Yes, I will. Definitely what had to happen for you to make that shift from no to yes.

You know, I think if I look back and kind of look forward, now, it's the having the, I don't know if having the capacity to show that. I want to do this. I don't know how this will be. But I need to lean on people to do it. So from my example is I've raced downhill against Labradors at mountain board, I wrote a blade that I've done all sorts of crazy things. But now in my my early 30s, early 30s, the level of vision has restricted me while I can do, but in my head, there's no language of No, it's like, Yes, I'm going to adapt this. I'm going to figure out this. I don't understand how can I make this work for me?

That makes sense. Makes perfect sense in a way. What's interesting is this idea of someone who is visually impaired, racing down a mountain on a board. Yeah, I'm going What about this makes sense? And so you mentioned that there were other people involved. So is this what you meant by adaptive sports? Adapt?

Yeah, adaptive sports and adaptive lifestyle is kind of what my my parents, my sister also has this visual impairment My uncle has, it's hereditary, but I have the have really shown me and helped me to this day, how to adapt my lifestyle to allow me to be able to achieve what I want to achieve. And wherever, wherever it is

cool. Well, there is no doubt that you have achieved a lot. So just we met, because you created a visual experience for other people in the positive prime platform. And we'll put all the links for this in the show notes, so people can actually experience it. There's something worth unpacking this idea of your what other people would see limitation, that hasn't stopped you from creating and actually giving a impact in the arena of your impairment.

So true, Jackie, you know, if you think about some of the famous people who have gone through, they just see another avenue of the world, you know, they could be deaf blind, missing, limbs can't walk, they just see another aspect of the world. I think, for me, I see that were a part of me inside doesn't see I'm blind or visually impaired, but the art world sees that. And that's where the conflict comes. But internally, I can see all these amazing ideas. And I started putting pieces together like the positive priming session that you're

talking about. If you wanted to hmm, you know, it's not often that I go in my brain goes, nope, stop, you're going the wrong direction. So I'm going to bring myself back and we're going to stick with this. When you use the word see in the sentence, I am now very curious. All right, what do you see? I see.

You know, 30 or 40% of our people can see I still have vision right now on I lose it over a period of time. But if you if you grab your hand and slowly turn it into a into a mid fist block like that, that's how I see it.

Right now. Got it. So is this so like a tunnel? You get to see one little centerpiece?

Yeah, don't ask me to read things are to give you directions or ask what color your eyes I can't see that. But everything else I can see perfect in the daytime, nighttime, I have nothing. So the back of the the back of the eyes caving in over a period of time.

Got it. And so this is something that at the age of seven, all of a sudden it was all your world is not going to be your the world you thought That's correct. The resilience that children have, is not always so present as we age. And what do you do to keep yourself emotionally resilient? Because you were very resilient it at the age of seven?

You know, Jackie, I don't have an answer to do that. But if I look deeply within I just did well, I enjoyed playing video games, computers, going out doing kicking the ball, whatever it was, I didn't really think as resilience. I just thought it was normal life. But you know, people say, Oh, you're resilient or all that. Yeah, that's is I'm just living my world the same way you or anyone else within the condition I have, or the deck of cards I've been dealt with?

Well, there's a little bit of a difference because most people that I have met so called normal people, you know, people who do not have the obvious shifts. So you got, like I said, You dealt with two big shifts that were outside of your control of the age seven, there are people who don't have those kinds of shift experiences. And they end up a lot of them. spending their time doing what they don't enjoy talking about what they don't enjoy speaking about what's not so good about their life or other people's lives of the world. And I'm wondering if you've noticed any correlation, anything that would help understand what makes this so obvious, you know, because for me, this is like, oh, wait a minute. People who don't have these pivots, don't see the world the same way.

I get that one on Bruce and Jackie. But I think for me, I came into this life like this. I had the umbilical cord wrapped around my neck at birth. And I had a choice to stay or not to stay and I decided this day so I think internally internally me as a soul in this human body on this planet. Resilience is part of one of the elements As does naturally in me, in the sense of I move from to sports, I moved across the world I've been given challenge after after challenge after challenge. And I love that challenge. I have a nutritionist who I work with at the moment. And Sharon give you she said to me, you know, give you a challenge aren't and you will conquer it. And I think that's because in resiliency is naturally in me as a human being on this planet. That makes sense.

It makes total sense. And I'm totally past because what I really want to know is what we can share with with everyone that will help them become more resilient. So it is one thing for nature, it is another for nurture. And for all that you are naturally resilient, you also do things to nurture that to nurture your positivity and to protect it. And so those are the avenues that maybe we will go down now. Because what's your mission? In life Aaron, beyond doing what you enjoy?

My mission is to show people how adaptive and how abilities we have. We live in a world as you know, nearly 8 billion people and recenter percentage of that people have a disability. But they have this massive ability. And I think, for me, it's how to use those skills, those depths, those knowledge to inspire people, and also give them the tools that I've learned over the last my lifetime because we're all high performers, higher achievers, regardless of what it is and who we are.

That makes sense. Okay, so I got this clue here. So one, you've got some tools. So we're going to talk about tools for just a minute. What are the tools that you use to help people see the massive ability that they have?

Nature is one tool, like when you're in the outdoors in nature, you're you're free, you're grounded. That's one tool. The second tool is using what they love. I love sports. I love food. I love technology, that's my language, that that's my playground. It's how to bring people back into that space of, yeah, I want to earn a million dollars. But how can I do that, and why I love what I'm good at. Because we're all good at something, you know, in my apartment, it's sport, it's the anatomy, it's massage, because that's what I love on top of other stuff. But the biggest tool, and I've kind of discovered throughout the last couple of years is what you love. Because if you love something so much, and so well, you're gonna go to the places where you're not life knocks you down, you get back up, and you don't really care about what's happening. You're just such in love with what it is that, you know, inspires you to be who you are. But that's that's the biggest tool I have my toolbox I see for me, when I see and others that makes sense.

It makes sense. It's interesting, because you're talking to very significant energetic, energetic forces, the energy of being in nature, you're well documented, you get out where it's green, if you live someplace where it's green. For me, I'm a water. I'm not a water personality in any kind of view, Eastern philosophy, but what I am is energized by being near water. And so being out in nature for me, if it's going to be beneficial, I'm not going to be necessarily hugging a tree, I'm going to be sitting by the water, but figuring out what it is that brings your energy up when you are in nature. Yeah, I'm more likely to keep myself behind the screen because I live in Florida. And there are bugs and they like to eat meat, so that everyone gets out in nature in their own way. And my idea is that it's important to pay attention to what aspects of nature actually feed your soul so that you can do more of those. Did I get it?

That that's true, because, you know, an apartment could be your playground, once you have the windows open the beach can be your playground, walking through a forest could be a playground just being your garden because we're this electrical magnetic being that is here on this planet on you charge that into its max. It's like whoa. And I've experienced that through the eight week meditation trip and other meditation trips I've done in the middle of nowhere in nature, and it's like, wow, so I guess you know,

whoa, there's a tool you did not mention before, so I'm going to add it to the list and come back to it. All right, so actually, we'll go to it first and then we'll do the last one. We'll do la Okay, meditation, I made it to an eight week meditation trip in nature. This is not exactly what most people would consider a normal or conventional, like era that you have. Tell me what that is, I have never heard of such a thing.

So I practice a meditation called kriya yoga and they have ashrams around the world and Houghton Dorf in Vienna and Miami, homestead and Chicago. And when I'm usually at the finish, or at the point where I just need to check out and go to them, I, I hopped on a plane I had there and I spend, you know, between four and eight weeks there. In 2013, I spent eight weeks in Miami and Chicago and then on the Queen Mary ship giving energy treatments and lectures, but that's my my retreat spot where I go for a meditation about, you know, an hour and a half between an hour and three hours, depending how I want to now assume that 344 times a day, you

know, well, you know, that's when I finished up one of my energetic healing arts certifications. I did 10 days into Zen monastery. And so these people meditate, you know, hours every day, it didn't dawn on me that that would be part of a high performance athletes lifestyle. Yeah. Because when you introduced yourself, you kind of glossed over the fact that you you've run triathlons, you're a high performing athlete, high performance athlete. And so taking eight weeks to go sit and meditate seems at odds on the surface to that kind of achievement. Where do they fit together?

You know, if you want to be to do what I do, you need to take time off because for you know, I'm pushing my body six days a week, two sessions a day, which is above four hours, four hours a day, doing what I'm doing, used to be rowing. But since 2090, I moved into triathlon. And I use the rowing, for example, because it's one of the most grueling sports on the planet, six minutes for two kilometer race. You're rowing from September to September to September, if you're on international circus, so in 2013, and in 2019, I decided to head off to the ashram and just meditate. The other thing is, when I had massive success in rowing, I had I jumped from junior to senior in the space of three months, which was a massive jump, when running metal breaking records and going straight to senior guys who are you know, heavier than me taller than me more experience. And I lost that race and Europeans and I had problems in school because I was still in high school at the time in Ireland. And my mom said, Hey, there's this lady nearby us and Gibson, co she does Reiki? Do I give it a try as we go? Yeah. And that's kind of where the avenue of holistic therapies and massage and meditation kicked in. And then my uncle gave me a book, aha biography of Yogi by Paramahansa Yogananda. And that's where the love for Kriya Yoga kicked in, in 2010. So perhaps man does meditation every day. To this day, no.

Got it. Okay, I admire your ability to focus. That book happens to go in that collection of books that I did not get through. I got it started and just got lost in it. And it was like, No, I'm not even absorbing this. So I appreciate the fact that there is a path for everyone. And that book, while it wasn't my path, it was your path. And that's something that I think, speaks to the conversation that we're having about resilience. Just because one path is a no for me, it might be a yes, for someone else, just like that book was for us. Cool. Well, thank you for unpacking that and helping me to understand that the more we do, you is a high performance athlete. I'm gonna call myself a high performance entrepreneur, because I've discovered that I tend to get more done in a year than most people get done under a decade. I didn't realize there was something high performance about what I did because I don't follow anybody's rules. But I get it done. And so now that I understand how meditation fits in for you, I'm going to take another look at it for me because I'm plugging is not my strong suit.

And jacket doesn't have to be sitting down for me walking through nature, it can be whatever whatever floats Suppose you can be watching TV, whatever, you know, meditation is everything. And every thing you can do, it's not just sit in the lowest position, the middle of your garden, it can be absolutely anything. So I just want to debug that. Because in the world of meditation, it's like, yeah, I need to sit my yoga pants in my, my beanbag in the room with the candles, know me nature, sometimes I just walk for three hours straight and nature and Ireland's in the forest near my parents house. And that's a form of meditation. So just want to debug that.

So what is required for meditation, if it is not the room, and the candles and the lotus position, if that is not a requirement of meditation, what is

first of all, it's checking out of technology, that's the big palace second, being with yourself in silence, or just letting your mind run or whatever, whatever it is, you know, when I go through those three, four walks, I I do keep my phone on because I'm going through the forest, but I don't look at it, I hit on mute, and I just walk and whatever pops through my head is like, Oh, that's great, whatever. And so that is a form of meditation, you know, gardening is a form of meditation, you know, hybrid, meanwhile, for a small run is meditation. But we pack it into this linear boxes, it has to be, you know, incense and has to be this not you know, make up your own rules, because it's your body, your mind, your soul, and you have in depth knowledge to make up your own stuff. Like you just mentioned with you, Jackie, you know,

all right. So the requirements for meditation are to unplug and be silent. Or at least get someplace where you can be silent, in and out. So you can actually

put on presence presence of you in that space, each Bush each movement, whatever because if you're not presence, you're not meditation.

Got it, unplugging get, unplug and plug in. Okay, unplug from the outside world and plug into the inside world be present. Oh, cool. I like simple things. That one I can wrap my head around. The other one is my love as well as yours, which is do what you love. I call it being in the center of your own life. It's been this one life you have doing what you love. I'm for you that meant bucking the system.

I like that phrase. I totally agree. Yes.

I think Aaron that is where you become the common man. This is where you have the common experience for all that you have led an uncommon life as an international traveler, and as a high performance athlete, even without needing it to have the word adaptive in there anywhere. Those are both things that a very small fraction of the world can claim. However, this struggle with a system that gives us the rules of success and gives us the path that we're supposed to walk. And when that's not our way. What our love is not the conventional path to buck that system. I think that is the human experience. I think very few people are actually designed for what our societies are telling us is normal and is what success is. So let's take a swing at that for just a moment. When it comes to personal definitions of success. What does success look like for you? Um,

I have many levels of success. You know, I love food. I love cooking. I love mixing the ingredients I've I have friends who are very good chefs to make them cry over food and recipe that's one success for me someone in some way.

Oh my goodness. There's something about that sentence it's just like oh no, I'm a successful chef with my friends cry over my recipes.

No no like they they make them I eat them and it's a challenge a really good friends who was a really good chef in Ireland him and I would have competitions of he bring what I'd order something he come out and like very fat and it's like the challenge of like all obese women food and he knew like I can have an endless bottomless appetite and it's just like, there you go. Can't eat that last slice left. So but you know life is life is fun. And that's that's part of my love of food.

I Love that you have a definition of success in different areas of your life. It's not one all encompassing. I'll be successful when it's, I'm successful when it's a current present thing for you. I think maybe that's one of the biggest keys. Aaron, why wouldn't to answer my earlier question about resilience, it is your ability to have success be a now a thing, a nickering thing and experience thing, as opposed to it being a thought or a concept that you'll achieve, eventually.

But I totally agree, Jackie, and well, I do every year, September in my trading year starts, I set out four or five different goals and four or five different things. And I may hit them and I mean, us. And that's, that's okay. And that's what success is for me is, hey, I'm gonna set a goal here goal, their goal, there are no meters. So watch, but you fantastic. And I think we get humped up about successes like I hit this goal on this day, that time it will happen. But what is the consistent performance are doing to meet those success because success could be as simple as going out for dinner with a family or going on a trip or, you know, getting a massive paycheck, it's paycheck, it's 10, or 1000, different things that success is made of.

I love it. Success is setting the goals, not getting the goals. Its successes for you. And this is a very important point, I think for everyone, and I'm going to take it to heart. Success is not getting the goals, meeting the goals. Success is setting the goals, the intention, taking the actions towards the goals. Just living in that intention of the golf, is what I'm hearing you say is what success is for you. Yeah, I agree. Isn't that an easy definition? I really, really love that. Aaron, I want to thank you very, very much for taking the time to share your tools to share this journey that you have been on with us to break through some of the perceptions that people might have about what abilities and disabilities and the reality of sometimes you say yes, when the world says no.

Thank you so much, Chuck. It's been a pleasure. I love your podcast. And this has been a juicy conversation as usual with you. So thank you.

You're very, very welcome, Aaron. All right, guys, what are you gonna say yes to? Are you willing to change your definition of success? Or maybe just your definition of meditation? Whatever it is, embrace the change. Go for the yes, in your life.