In the latest episode of The Ultimate Coach Podcast, host Ipek Williamson welcomes Amy Blake Hardison, the co-author of "The Ultimate Coach" and its new adaptation, "The Ultimate Coach Concentrated". Amy shares the inspiration behind the creation of the concentrated version of the book, emphasizing how a conversation with a young reader from India sparked the idea to create a more accessible and impactful version for younger audiences. She describes the rigorous process of condensing the original content without losing its essence, ensuring that the core messages of integrity, commitment, and the power of creating one's own life remain intact.
Throughout the conversation, Amy offers insights into her personal journey of writing both books, highlighting the emotional and creative challenges she faced. She also reflects on the profound impact of the books on readers, especially young people, who are encouraged to take control of their lives and pursue their dreams with determination and integrity. Amy's heartfelt anecdotes and deep reflections provide a glimpse into the dedication and love that she and Steve Hardison pour into their work and their partnership, making this episode a truly inspiring listen for anyone looking to make a positive impact in their own lives and the lives of others.
About the Guest:
Amy Blake Hardison was born and raised in Phoenix and Mesa, Arizona. She has been married to Steve Hardison for forty-six years. They have four children and eleven grandchildren.
Amy graduated from Weber State University in 1980 in English. Following her graduation, she transitioned to her career as a stay-at-home mother, focusing her time and energy on her family.
Amy loves to exercise, swim, read, listen to audiobooks. (She loves history and WWII, but as an English major she also loves great fiction). She especially loves spending time with her family. Throughout her life, Amy's passion has been learning. She worked as a volunteer teacher for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for twenty-four years, teaching Biblical studies to young adults. She has participated in four Sidney B. Sperry Symposiums at BYU and her papers were published in the accompanying volumes.
Amy has authored four books: How to Feel Great About Being a Mother (1987), Understanding the Symbols, Covenants, and Ordinances of the Temple (2016), the book of being, entitled The Ultimate Coach, and The Ultimate Coach Concentrated. These diverse books reflect the things that matter most to Amy: her husband, her children, and her faith.
About the Host:
A beacon of change and a catalyst for transformation, Ipek Williamson is a multifaceted professional who seamlessly integrates two decades of corporate expertise with a diverse skill set as a coach, mentor, speaker, author, meditation advocate, and teacher. Her mission is to guide individuals through the complexities of modern life, helping them find deep peace and harmony. Ipek's coaching approach, rooted in Core Values, Mental Fitness, and Mind Mastery, empowers clients to unlock their hidden potential and confidently embrace change with joy.
Beyond coaching, Ipek's influence spreads through her 100+ meditations on the Insight Timer App and live meditation sessions, where she shares transformative wisdom. Her impact extends to workshops, courses, and training sessions for individuals, groups, and corporations. As a Change Champion, Ipek Williamson is dedicated to promoting positive change, nurturing inner calm, and empowering others to script their own transformation stories.
ipek@ipekwilliamsoncoaching.com
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TUCP Intro/Outro: Thank you for tuning in to The Ultimate Coach podcast, a companion to the transformative book, The Ultimate Coach, written by Amy Hardison, and Alan D. Thompson. Each conversation is designed to be a powerful wake up call, reminding us of what's possible for you and your life. So if you're on a journey to expand your state of being, this podcast is for you.
Welcome to The Ultimate Coach podcast. I am your host Ipek Williamson, and today, we have the privilege of speaking with an extraordinary guest, Amy Hardison. Amy is the heart and soul behind the scenes of one of the most influential coaches in the world. Steve Hardison. Together, Amy and Steve, form a dynamic team inspiring complex individuals with their incredible synergy and dedication to personal and spiritual growth. Amy is the author of several impactful books, including and especially the ultimate coach, and its latest adaptation, the ultimate coach concentrated with a very rich background in teaching, writing, and a deep commitment to her family. Amy's wisdom, and insights are sure to enrich our conversation today. Welcome, Amy to the podcast. Thank you for being here with us.
Thank you for your gracious introduction.
You are most welcome, Amy. It is indeed such an honor to have you on the podcast. But do you maybe start by telling us what inspired the creation of the ultimate coach concentrated and how it is different from the ultimate coach book?
Yes, so the ultimate coach, the original, trying to think maybe been out two years. And a young gentleman like a 13 year old from India called Steve and his name was sassy. And he called him early in the morning with the time change. And he said, you know, Mr. Hardison, I I have this book that I don't understand. Can you explain being to me, and as Steve talktime, this young gentleman was so hungry to learn more. And but he didn't speak very much English. He didn't read English. And so he really needed some help. So Steve contacted Ranjan, and said Ranjan, here's the background, I request that we help this young man. And I just said, I'll get on it and get right back to you. And he texted him back the next day. And he said that he had committed to go with them word by word, sentence by sentence through the book, so he could understand it. When I heard that I was so blown away. I mean, that's hours and hours in rent and has his regular life, his family going on, on top of that. And so I was just moved, and we were actually driving to our one of our grandson's basketball games. And we were just talking and Steve said, you know, maybe we need like a teenage book or something, maybe we can get someone to do that. I'm like, Whoa, no, no, no, we don't get someone to do that. This is this is my baby. And the reason why that's interesting is going into the ultimate coach, I kind of went into it kicking and screaming, meaning I knew this was what I was supposed to do. It was crystal clear, but I was so daunted by the amount of time and the work and the effort that was going to go into it. And I anticipated, you know, maybe six or eight really intense months, and it was 12 months of super intense work. And so And yet it was it was like I just absolutely knew that was the thing to do. And this time, there wasn't any resistance. It's like, No, this is my story. I'm the one who would know how to cut and where to cut and what needs to be there. So I jumped into this one. And, you know, originally, it was Alan Thompson's idea. And you know, he did all of the research and shared it with us. And as he and Steve are talking, they're saying, you know, this is gonna be like 800 pages, it could be volumes. And as a writer, I'm sitting there going, Oh, my goodness, you know, no, we can't have it be volumes. We need to shorten this. So when we got the ultimate coach down to 520 pages, or whatever it is, that was significantly, I had to thin out a lot to get it to that point. And it took two years to set it aside. To be able to come back with the rigor that's needed to cut things that you've already labored for and felt like they were were perfectly the way they were. And because you have to be almost heartless with yourself. And you have to be able to cut out things that you've felt phrases you fell in love with stories you did. But what drove me as I was writing it is, in fact, in my mind, I'm thinking, I want to get down to half the length. And that means I am going to have to be super rigorous on everything that goes in. And when I sent the first draft to my final draft, to Chris, for the personnel, some of our editor for the first time for him to look at it, he actually said, I think you've had a little too much out of the life story. So we went back, put some stuff back in it, but my intention was to get it to half the length without losing the power. And without losing any of creating the essence of the status, or the work that he does or what being is and so that that's not as easy as it sounds. But I think of, you know, the whip or whatever someone says, you know, I, I was only asked to speak last night. So you're not prepared this talk, if I had more time, I would have made it shorter. And you know, without less time you get the whole thing, it takes a certain amount of real focus, to say, Okay, what is the point where only the essentials here, but the essential is all that's needed, you don't cut out too much. So that's kind of the background, and how it went and some of the journey of creating it.
I really liked how you explained why concentrated why you use that word. When I read the book, at the beginning, you say that you concentrated it. And you know, when you have lots of things to say, and lots of time or place to say it, it's easier, it's harder to make it more succinct and shorter. And that I can tell, it must have been more challenging, of course. And on the other hand, it makes it the book less intimidating for young readers, right? Because when you look at thick book, it's not like, it's not that easy for especially young people to read such a big book. So I love how you brought down these two books down to the concentrated version. And I saw love both of the books I worked by read the first one multiple times. And I read once the new one. And I see that you did a really good job and keeping the essence of what was intended to put out there. And
I The other thing about it is especially I don't even know if it's just that I was looking for a younger reader as much as this was a second time through. And I really wanted to step up my craft my ability to invite the reader into the story as if they were living it and seeing it through Steve's eyes. And so there's a little bit more dialogue like early on in the family history, his personal history part with his family. And that's that's an interesting line to walk, because obviously I wasn't there. But I have been a member of the Hardison family for 46 years. And we have spent countless hours as a family gathered and talking about our their memories. And I've heard all of the siblings share their viewpoints of what it was like growing up. And on top of that, when we got married Steve's mom was we were the only family that lived in Arizona and she lived in Arizona, and we spent a lot of time with her. And she shared stories and shared things with me that were from her perspective. And Steven I found out at one time, maybe about 20 years ago or so that he had a great uncle that was alive. That was like 103 years old. And we took a trip back to Kentucky because Steve wanted to get to actually talk to some of the people that didn't knew his dad, because he only has a couple experiences that he actually remembers. And when we went back and we talked to people some of the things that I put into the second book, were on exact they were actual quotes, you know, we would talk we talked to this one friend as to spa there. And when we asked him, you know what this foot was Steve stab, like, what were the hardest things like and he says all those hardest ones. They were hard living you know, and that made it in and so I recalled these different experiences and and apparently, a lot of the horses were hard drinkers, you know, just lots of just a hard life. And so Steve's father's parents were kind of the one exception in the family and for they were a church going Baptists, they walk to church every single Sunday, barefoot, they were just kind of different than the rest of the siblings. And so I wrote in the book, that if like Roy felt like he fit in better with the other hardest sense. So I'm not. I'm creating the the actual words, but they're coming out of real experiences. But because I'm creating some dialogue, I do feel like it especially brings a young reader and so that their experience is who I should say, so they're experiencing it versus reading it. Yeah, they are stepping inside and seeing the world through Steve sighs. So I worked on that a little bit more in dispersion.
Yeah, thank you. Well, writing a book involves a VC tears, sweat and hard work, but sometimes laughter too, I hope. So if I ask you about a funny or joyful memory from the process of creation of either one of the ultimate coach, or the ultimate coach, concentrated books, what comes up for you?
Well, first, you explained it well, you know, the Blood, Sweat and Tears is all there. But there, it is thrilling, it is thrilling to come up with something or sometimes she could work all day, I wanted something, I think I rewrote the very first few pages of the very first chapter multiple times for I mean, 10 times for the first book. And it wasn't till the second book that I felt like, okay, now I finally got it. Because those are your first chapters. And so when you get it, it's like, you're usually like folding clothes, you or something, you've you've left the creative, you've left the jazz and you are doing your life. And in flight, your subconscious keeps working on the creativity part. And then you just, it's just like this light goes off. And you're like, that's it. That's what I need to do. You know, and so there's a lot of laboring over every word, but when it works, it's like this thrilling roller coaster like as you're going down the hill, and you get this speed, that thrill of speed that it's like, This is so fun, you know, and so the creativity is exciting, and exacting both at the same time. And I don't know if this is funny, but I know there were some things I felt like it was really important when I wrote the book that people experience all the sides of steed. And one of the challenges of Allen's version is he didn't know those, you know, and even people that you would have interviewed wouldn't have known those. There's no way she could. And I read it, read Alan's version. And I thought what this needs is some of the reality of the pain of the breaking down at foot. I don't know if I can go on, you know, the some of the real hard things. Because isn't that what makes us Let me sleep interesting, which makes people interesting. You know, we don't, we don't want to read a book about something where everything is always gone perfectly in our life. And it was just this straight shot to success because it feels unreal. It's like, well, oh, that's nice for him or her. But I could never do that. And it's like, oh, read the story. And that's interesting, you know, and so there were times I would write a chapter and I'd take it to Steve, and I'm kind of waiting for him to read it. And it's like, is he gonna let this one go? He's gonna let this go through the you know, because there were some, you know, really blunt things. And he was so generous and so gracious. And there were only a couple of things where he said, I don't want that. And it wasn't, they weren't big things. It was. John Deere made a comment about his dancing or something. And stuff. Like I love my dad's. So So of all the things that could be in there, that was the only one that Steve's like, no, no, I don't want that one. So I thought that was funny.
Yes, yeah, that's it. Thank you for sharing that. Through the book, especially the second one concentrated. What are the key messages and takeaways that you hope young readers especially will gain from reading?
I think, to give a teenager or young person, a book where they can see that they can create their life and to create a document to create everything that calls to them. It's not just okay, here's what's given to you by your family or your circumstances. It's like, No, you are at the helm of your life. And this is possible. It's like that, that opens up everything, you know, even to teach them principles about being their word and integrity. That for me, the crux to handle a young person is the ability to create their life And, yeah, I just I think that's the hugest gift and a blessing.
While you said it perfectly, because I saw I agree, we see and lack of core values, erosion of core values in society. This book is talking about commitment, about integrity, about being your word, about taking action. So I see so much motivation that comes with everything this book stands for.
And I think it's important to highlight these things that will help them be really successful in their life in whatever career they do. But to also balance it with the, the fun part of Steve, the love part of Steve, the relationships, because all of that if you just get all of this great success in business, but you don't have those other things, it's not the complete package. And then life isn't as rewarding and as sweet as it can be. So to bring in all of it, and tie it all together, I think is important. And then, of course, his background is helpful for those kids that aren't growing up with ideal families. And there's a lot of fat. So it's, you know, part of it's saying he can do that, I can do that. And then like you said, those, those different principles,
Absolutely. Where you started doesn't mean where you're gonna end. And there are so many examples of people who are coming from hard starts difficult starts to life. But it is possible, there's life is filled with possibility and anyone can thrive. So beautiful. It's has only been a couple of months since the ultimate coach concentrated got published. But have you had the opportunity to receive any feedback from any teenagers or young adults who have read it?
So far, we've had some feedback, I have not gotten a lot of feedback, because it's kind of new. And it's kind of coming out a little bit more organically with it. But great feedback, one versus one mother who read it, or who has teenagers said that she felt like anyone could read. The old my coaches concentrated like this was for everyone, where maybe the ultimate coach, and maybe had a little bit narrower audience for this, as she said, everyone can get something from this side. So I've had some wonderful things come back. But I think we're just at the front end of that. And I'm not really keyed in. Like, there's, there's a little bit of me, it's like I've written it was released it, it's out there. And I'm back to to my regular life, where I'm just really involved with my, with my family and my responsibilities. And so I am not active on social media, which is kind of makes me a dinosaur for in the world. But it was just a choice that I made, because there's so many demands on time. And I think social media does so many really good things and keeping keeping people connected, but I just made that choice for me. And I think that's where you get a lot of feedback. And there's just a little bit of, I'm okay, because I've done the best I could, and now it's out there. And it is what it is. And if people love it and find great value. That's awesome. But my job's done.
So how has the process of writing this book, these two books, like when you when you look at your life before the ultimate coach book, and the ultimate coach, concentrated book, what changed for you how this process of writing those two books changed you.
It's been a huge shift from writing the book to where the being movement got started to where we're speaking in England, and in India and Phoenix and other places in the Birmingham event. And for someone who didn't choose social media, all of a sudden, there's all these worldwide connections. And I have we have met just the most amazing, wonderful people. And it's been so rich and rich to know that our that our book has made a difference. But it's gotten really busy, and with a lot more demands on our time. And you know, it's in a wonderful way. Everyone's like, Oh, I just need a little piece here and a little piece here. And then finally, Steven I said, we're going to have to pull back so that we can focus again, on the things that are important to us, which is our relationship our children, our commitments to our religion and, and things like that. And it's not like, all these other things aren't wonderful. But in pulling back, the kind of gun to our life the way it was before the book, which is just, there's just only so much of you the that's available, you know, and even writing the book, I had just kind of had to disconnect from everything else, you know, much not time with my grandkids or not relaxed time, really, with my family. And it was just this real narrow focus for a year for the first book, and for a few months for the second one. And then when, after we gave it to Chris, and we worked on editing, it's not as intense, it's not like eight hours a day. But the other is, and I felt like as I wrote the ultimate coach, and then the couple other months for the concentrated, my life was really out of balance, like all I did was write and you know, I'd write eight hours a day. And then at the end, I just be mentally and physically exhausted, and I still had my responsibilities to handle and, and Steve was wonderful on and pitched in and did a lot of things to help and learn how to grocery shop and all kinds of fun things. But I was it was out of balance. And if I were to do it again, I do it the same way. Because if I didn't, it would have taken three years to write. And it's really hard to break your momentum, when you're going it's, it's harder and easier to put that concentrated focus on and it keeps your momentum going. It keeps, you know, and theists would come into my life. And I'm just like, I'm not available, I can't do that I'm working, you know, from, you know, eight in the morning until 530 In the evening, every single day, Monday through Saturday, and that that's how to balance. So I wouldn't want to do that consistently. So as we're moving, we're moving back to a more balanced life. And I can't say that anything, the experiences that we had been more involved or anything but amazing. You know, it was just so rich, so many lovely, loving, amazing, capable, talented, world shaking kinds of people we have been able to meet.
It literally exploded, like, as soon as the the first book came out. It was like an explosion. And I can understand how overwhelming might be for you and Steve, especially as the people who are in the center of this whole attention that came with it. So I thought you you guys handled pretty good. Okay, so now there's a question that I ask everyone. So as you know, both books have those infamous questions from Steve, in the before you begin section and on the back of the book. And I see that the actually, before you begin parts of the ultimate code concentrated book are different than the first book, The questions are different. So keeping that in mind, which one of all those questions, the questions is the one you feel like you need to focus on at this moment in time in your life? Well, the one
that I am focusing on now, but probably always, it's like, my ongoing question is Who would I need to be to be a more loving person? Because I feel like that's what life's all about, like the whole journey of life, I would say you could probably boil it down into five fundamental paths. And for me, the path to how do I become more loving is just such a dominant path. I think it's so important and it's such a rigorous progress process of taking the ego meaning what I want, the way I think it should be, my ideas might be right, you know, and taking that and smoothing off those edges and creating space for other people. It's a lifelong process, and it's not easy. And I for me, it's like I'm I'm always trying on new ways to access wealth, not like every day that I mean you go through periods and you look back and and the last several months. I have some questions that came from a talk Bloomberg leaders of our church but it's he said this and and this is what I've really been stepping into. He said my hope today is to suggest some choices that may seem difficult. Pray for the love that allows you to see the good in your companion. Pray for the lead that makes the weaknesses and mistakes seems small. Pray for the love to make your pet companions joy, your own prey for the love to want to lessen the load and soften the sorrow as your companion. And so that to me is As a refining kind of love is really about getting your own self out of the way and flight you want. And I've been trying to step into that. And it's sweet and sometimes stretching. And I think a lot of times when it's a to it, I need to be a more loving person, the first thing that comes to people's mind and definitely to my mind is your romantic relationship, your primary, you know, marriage or partnership, or whatever it is that there's so many ways to love. And I have, I currently have my, my oldest brother is 10 years older than I am. And he has dementia. And he's 74. But his dementia started at 68, which to me is is way too young. And he was super physically active. He was he played tennis he he rode mountain bike, see wizard he served, he did mountain biking, I mean, he was just always active, he was always learning, he was learning new things. You know, it's like he did everything you're supposed to do to help stave off dementia. And then here it hits some really early. And I had been going over for since the first of the year, I've been going over and spending Wednesday mornings with them. So I'm there for three or four hours. And it has been one of the sweetest experiences of my life, and helping take care of my parents in their later years where they ended up both with dementia was is definitely one of the sweetest experiences of my wife, and I just love being able to go over to my brothers and, and he loves World War Two, and I love World War Two. So we will watch documentaries, and we will watch movies. And sometimes, you know, like Yes. How can I even say this is a sacrifice where we go hang out and watch our favorite kind of movies. But it's it's more than that. It's that, you know, like I've I got our family organized, our extended family organized and we created a Shutterfly book for my siblings all gave us pictures and wrote about memories and about how they left my brother and I got our nieces and nephews and they put in submitted pictures and read memories for him. And so we created this book, and we'll go through it and it's not like you read this book. It's like, oh, rotted Look at that. Do you remember when? Or do you remember having that bike? Or do you remember that when we did for Christmas, and it gives us a chance to talk about things he can remember because often was dementia, you can remember way, way back you just other stuff you can't remember. But the space, when I am with Anna, all I can say is there's just pure lot. There's no expectations, there's no it's just like I am being with someone that I love. And my intention is to just have him feel love. And it is it is such a privilege. You know, I go home each time just so you know, I just feel like I'm not grounded on ground anymore. It's just like the spiritual lift that carries me home. And I talk a lot about this. And I think you know, love. When as we expand love to stretch it, it's the hard left this stretch is that easy love is does not stretch you, you know, the easy love that to falling in love head over heels. It's like, that's, you know, that's just awesome. It doesn't require the growth in that. And I have watched, watch my brother go through this and thought, you know, if you're the person going through it, you may think this is one of the hardest experiences ever. But here I am. Getting to be someone who loves and supports him supports him. And I think this is one of the most amazing experiences ever. And it's calling us forced to be people that we haven't been and to connect i I've always loved my brother and I love them more now than I had ever loved him and I feel closer now than I've ever loved him and it has had me question life where we think life needs to look a certain way for us to be, you know, fully actualized at to be to to really thrive. And I'm looking at a situation she's not thriving, and the luck is growing, and leaps and downs. So I am learning that sometimes that we get to be the one who loves and sometimes we get to be the catalyst for someone else to love. And we might not choose to be the catalyst. But there's real value in that. And, you know, outside if I if that was the only way I could my kids could experience the sweet, wonderful experiences that I have. Would I would I go through it. It's like, well, you know, here's a choice. You either will or you won't. But I'm starting to see new facets of I love that I didn't see just a couple years ago. Because up till then I was seeing the match. Ah, you know, that would be the worst thing ever. And now I think, a new path for love.
Oh, this is so beautiful. Thank you for sharing this, Amy and I had the privilege of spending a little time with you in person. And I must say you exude love. Like when I look at you, when I'm in your presence. The only thing I feel is love and beauty in like that is coming inside of you if that is coming from you, and the light that is coming from us.
It's we go on our whole life and and thank you. So
now I'm gonna ask you three rapid fire questions. The first one is, what is the dish you love to cook the most
Homemade bread? Because I love to eat obeyed bread. Oh,
So is there a specific like regular bread? Or do you put any special things in it like some put like, nuts and stuff like that.
I grind my own fleet. So it's super fresh. And sometimes that put dried cranberries and walnuts in it. And sometimes just painful feet. But that's my Facebook feed group. So it's kind of it's even kind of like I was planning my meals. I'll start with my piece of homemade bread and then add all of the other things, all the other food groups around it. So that's definitely
That's a given on your plate. But yeah, I love walnuts in bread on made what bread is really delicious. Okay, do you and Steve have had names for each other? And if yes, what are adults?
I find that I usually call them sweetheart. Probably I call him sweetheart more than I call him Steve. And I don't think I chose it. It just kind of evolved. And then he has a lot of funny names for me like Pumpkinhead and Kazoo and pipe breath. And just I mean, random crazy things that he does that they he has a whole bunch of them. But yeah, Pumpkinhead one.
Lovely. Okay, the third one, I know you and Steve traveled a lot, especially after the book was out which destination in the world that you visited so far had the biggest impact on you and why?
That's hard, because they were also impactful. You know that it's like choosing your favorite kid is like that's it. That's a really tough one. Because of that. So I've noticed that I can't, yeah, we had events, both in London. And I wasn't able to make it to the Birmingham one, but we had them in London and in Mumbai. And so I have to say, to step in to those rooms and see all the work that people had done for months and months and months, and everything and ended in Phoenix, the Phoenix events, the same thing, where you walk in, and it is so humbling. And you're I'm just in awe of the magnificence of people. And it's not about us, it's about them being movement, but it's kind of about us. You know, it's we're kind of there. And so if when it's like you have all of that to support you, it is extremely humbling, in a wonderful way, and you just can't help but fall in love with these people. And I have never in my life ever, ever, ever thought there would ever be a time in my life where I would be at a stage and I'd look over and there'd be a line of people that just want to give you a hug, or just want to say thank you for writing the book. That is an incredible experience. And it's just is heart to heart, you know, one human being to another human being and, and more often than not, I felt like the people that were there to meet me were were the women who wanted to share or want to thank me for representing a powerful woman in the world. And I like to say a powerful woman in a gentle way. A soft woman or people would say I am married to a powerful man, thank you for being your voice. I've had so many people say thank you for speaking up so publicly about how important family is to you and how important God is to you. And their response is always my family is that important to me. And that has been an experience I'll treasure my whole life. And it really is a magnificence of people. That is just beyond expression.
Yeah, beautiful. So going forward, what is next for Amy? Is there any project anything that you want to create next, what is in front of you,
It's almost easier to create a project than it is to not create a project. And what I am working on right now, in addition to my brother was dementia, I've had their six kids in my family of origin and four have had cancer in the last two years. And they're all they all have a good prognosis like they've had surgeries and different things. But but it's there's this very real feeling for me that time with the people I love the most is limited, are my siblings. And when you look at your my own kids and our grandkids, it's like your time, even then is limited, because they're growing up. And it's just this, for me the preciousness of family, and extended family, my family and my relationship with Steve, is really what I'm getting what I'm getting primary attention to. And I, I am trying to do less love more, just be present to the joy that's there every day. And the both of these books came to me to write. And so I kind of just have trust in the universe, that if there's a project I really need to write, it's going to come and in that moment, I will know it. Because I have thought and created things. And I've done a little bit of groundwork for him. And it's like, no, that's not what I need to be doing right now. Right now is just focusing on the people I love.
I so love what you said, do less love more. It's so beautiful. And yes, whatever is meant for you will just show up right in front of you. Right.
And I feel confident. Yes. That
Definitely. Okay. If you were in my position right now, as the host, and had the opportunity to interview yourself. What is one question you would ask yourself that I didn't?
That is a great question. Because you've asked such wonderful questions. And you've covered I think things that are really essential and essential to who I am and wonderful, wonderful questions. So I will have to think about this for just a second. Because it's kind of like asking the question is anything else's left and sad? I guess maybe the only thing and I had spoken about this a little bit is that one of the experiences I had in writing the book was stepping into something I really didn't know if I could do. I had written two books before this, but they were totally different genre, totally different. So as I'm writing this book, I'm reading books, on how to do things, how to how to write this kind of book. And I never had the absolute surety that I was good enough to do it. And even as we got close to an end, and we had this amazing, wonderful woman who is an editor and a film producer, and write screenplays, all kinds of things, and, and she read it and gave us her feedback. And she was so keenly. So so kind, it took me till the next day that I realized she kind of said, it's not quite good enough, but I can help you if you want. And I really sat with that. I thought it might not be quite good enough, but it's mine. And I wasn't ready to have someone else. Fix it. You know, it's like I could fix it. And people gave us feedback. And I changed things. And I, I proved it. But I didn't want to hire someone to do it. I still wanted it to be mine, that when I kind of realized that she said, it's not quite there it would it would make a nice book that you need a little bit more to have it impact the world, and it could impact the world. And I can just remember, we were sitting at our counter at dinner and I just kind of flopped down on the counter and put my head in my hands and started crying. And I just I said, Steve, I've done the best I can. This I couldn't do any better. And I said, I'm sorry, this is just my life always not quite good enough good, but not good enough to get it done. And, you know, so I stepped into something that was bigger than I am and then it kind of worked out and we got some amazing feedback from from capable qualified people, that friends that helped me improve it and then of course then we had Chris Nelson who came in and was is amazing to work with and you know could get his input on just what makes it better. And so it worked out that stepping into something that you're stepping into a gap and being willing to take the risk. And the the risk isn't like, Oh, what if I just can't do it? It's like, what have I spent a year of my life working as hard as I've ever worked on any project? And it's all for nothing. But it's like, what else? What other option is there? If you don't do it, you'll never know. So it's, it wasn't a sure thing. There was definite risk, there was self doubt. And then there was just moving forward with it. And then the end result has been way beyond anything I could experience. So that wasn't necessarily a given outcome. But like I said, you you don't know if you don't try.
Absolutely, have solidly. And thank you for doing thank you for going for it. And so many 1000s of people are benefiting from what you created. So thank you so much for your time. But what final piece of advice or encouragement would you like to offer to our listeners, who might be maybe struggling a little bit with life's challenges these days?
Oh, there are so many challenges. I think it I would say that life gets better. Like when you when you are, when something really hard is happening. It just colors, everything. And I found that in my experience, that within a day, it's going to be a whole lot better within a few weeks, sometimes with it, you know, it can take longer. But if you're in one of those really, really hard spots, then it's like it will pass, you know, this too, will pass and all of these things become such an incredible richness in the fabric of our lives. And it's a cliche, but it is in those hard times for all the growth. It's an amazing book that I totally loved is a book called more beautiful than before, and it's by a rabbi named Steve ladder. And he talks about that all of us go through hell, at some point, you know, we go through cancer, the hell of cancer, the hell of, of losing someone we'd love. He says an MD intention is to make our life worth the suffering to come out more beautiful than before. And it's like, that's all there is, you know, it's what we go through. And it's like, can we 10 out of this having learned life lessons that made me a richer, deeper human being, that allows me to have more compassion that allows me to understand life. At the scenic sedan, I spent a great deal of time talking about the privilege of getting old, because we don't hit that in our society that worships and youth and you know, all the bigger and the, you know, the bodies that look like they're 28 years old, instead of the 65 year old body with wrinkles, and you know, all of that. And I think the growing old is so amazing. And part of it is because you have all this experience, you have these hard things you've gone through and Viktor Frankl talks about the hard things that go on. He talks about people wanting to be on he says, I don't envy that. Who would want that. He says they have dreams to dream. I have life I had lived. And these hard things. Those are the things I'm most proud of, though they would not incite, nd no one would want them. But you know, so I think the hard things are such a rich part of life. And as we go through it, and then we get it to like my stage in life, you look back. And those hard things are such gifts, you know, and it's where we've learned and it's what I know, I would never one be 20 or 30 or 40 or even 50 If like this is the best because I have life live with all of its ups and downs and and good and the bad. And it's awesome.
Oh, beautiful. Thank you. Thank you so much, Amy for sharing your profound insights and stories with us today. Your contributions both through your writing and your partnership with Steve have truly touched and inspired so many lives. We appreciate your beautiful presence in our community. And for our listeners. If you haven't yet, be sure to check out the ultimate coach book and also the ultimate coach concentrated book or enriching reads, and especially the second one is suited for younger audiences. Thank you for tuning in to the ultimate coach podcast. Until next Time, keep embracing your journey and making a positive impact on the world around you. Thank you once again, dear Amy, thank you for being with me.
Thank you, Pat.
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