Voted Most Likely To

Hey, welcome to the Karen Kenny show, I'm superduper excited that you are here. And then I'm here at the same time. together for a little beat, for a few moments in time we get to, we get to spend a little time together. So I think I'm going to call this sucker voted most likely to. And then of course, it would be fill in the blank. voted most likely to. Now of course, of course, there's a story behind this whole episode. So I guess I'll start there, to get a little lead in all story, and then I'll explain where this can be super duper helpful and useful, hopefully, to you in your own life. So in this show, you know how it goes, we always do a little storytelling, we do a little spiritual work, we kind of try to bring them together. Because I'm all about things that are applicable. I'm all about things that are practical to me, what's the point of learning something that you can't actually use, or you won't use because it's too complicated, and too hard. And to just like not that, you know, I like tools that I can just pick up and slide right into my life. Okay. So at the at my recent retreat, the own your magic retreat that we just did, in November, I did this exercise, I shared this exercise. Now, of course, I can't go into the depth of it as much as I would like to hear. But I'm going to give you as my friend, Linda Thai says a little sip, sip, a little taste right, I'm not going to Firehose you. But I still think that what I'm going to share with you today is going to be useful and valuable and helpful. So this was an exercise that I did with the participants at the retreat. And I think it might be even though you weren't there, or maybe you were if you're a listener and you were there, you know what I'm talking about. But if you weren't there, maybe this little glimpse into it is going to be helpful. But where it got inspired by so I use it at the retreat. But the origin story of where this sucker all began, was I was in the kitchen, making snacks and making yummy vegan snacks. And those of you who know, you may know that I have three dogs and a cat. And one of our dogs are two, two older dogs like 13 All right, they're seniors, they're elderly, they still look at act that kind of like, I mean, they're great. They're great around the muzzle and you know, they are a little bit older, but they still kind of look like little puppies and we call them the littles. And then we have buncee buncee is like, just a little bit over a year old. He's a pug. And he's adorable, of course. So I'm in the kitchen making yummy snacks, my sweetie sitting at the at the table. And bunchy is like stalking me, okay, like I walking between like the counter in the fridge back and forth back was like my shadow, right? He's like, I'm like, What am I like, Why are you stalking? Now I know, I've asked you this question, but it's not really bothering me. I just think it's hysterical. And, you know, if you you know, double A many hands, you know if you have a dog who likes snacks, and you know that and I think that's why so many pugs end up fat and overweight and obese because they're so damn cute. And you look at them, they give you those pug eyes and you're like, Oh my God. Now so I don't we don't overfeed them. buncee is in fantastic shape. But the temptation is there to always give a snack Okay, and I'm most likely to break off a teeny piece a tea and you know, a little something, give a little little bit of a carrot like whatever it is, right? So I'm standing at the counter punches at my feet staring at me Give me trying to glamour me trying to glamour me with this googly eye. My sweetie. And I'm like, Oh my god. Why? Why is bunch like, stalking me. And my sweetie doesn't even look up from what he's doing. He's like, on his iPad. He's watching a music video or learning some guitar. I don't look at a gear, whatever he's doing, his musician brain is doing. He doesn't even look up. He just says because he knows that you'll give him that you'll probably give him a snack. Whatever it is, whatever little bit you'll probably break up a little piece and give it to him. So he doesn't show I was just like shit. He's got my number, you know? And so I just stopped laughing and I blurt out, yeah, and I raised her I'm like, Yeah, me voted most likely to give snacks, you know, and I just stopped laughing because it's true. Right? So the mom and the mom, not and again, we take good care of our kids are not overweight, whatever, but I am likely to give them a tiny bit of snack not shit that they shouldn't have, you know what I'm saying? mindfully, you know, give a little sack. Okay. And I start laughing because it's true. So I'm like yep, voted most likely to give snacks right like that's, that's the Do I raise my hand? And then I just start riffing off on a couple other things. I'm like also me also me also voted most likely to die trying to pet something I shouldn't. So I'm highly self entertaining as you can tell, so I'm just making myself laugh. And then I say to my sweetie, I'm like, Sweetie, what else do you think I would be voted most likely to? And I thought he was gonna say something. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. It says that was like ASIC or funny, whatever. My sweetie is very quick witted, you know, but he said, you'd be voted most likely to cheer someone else on. mer. It was so sweet. It was such a sweet thing to say. But that's my sweetie. Okay, so he says, voted most likely to cheer someone else on. And it made me think of like, of course, yeah, I am. I am a chi i am a good cheerleader. For others. It's one of my qualities that I actually kind of like, I love celebrating other people I love I just love cheering on other people's gifts and talents and brilliance. And, you know, whatever, whatever the thing is, I just get excited about that. And so it made me think about high school. And you know how back in high school. I don't know what they do these days. But back in my day, right? Graduating class of Lawrence high 86 Class of 86. So back in high school, you had the superlatives and the superlatives are like the adjectives, right? So, like think of superlatives? Like, the best or the most, like most athletic, the most attractive, whatever. So they usually have the words like the in front of it, like the tallest, the funniest, right? So the funniest superlative would be class clown. Okay, now I don't think I don't think they do most popular anymore. I think they do like best all around. I don't even know what I think they're afraid to hurt people's feelings like best all around. I'm like best all around what best all around asshole best all around, athlete, but I don't even know what that beats. Right. I need somebody I need a teenager to explain it to me. No. So, because it could mean oh, they're just all around. They're good in sports. They're good academically, like I don't know what it means. So somebody who has, you know, I should just call my best friend and be like, Hey, what is this stand for? You're a teacher tell me. Okay. So it's also so it's like the whatever. And then it's also most right most attractive, most popular, most whatever, most athletic, whatever they used to be. And there were also some that were like, most likely to wind up in jail. We literally had that when my class of 86 Oh my god, most likely to wind up in jail, most likely to be successful, right? Like we had different ones. Okay. So I was voted, I got vote. I was most popular in my high school. My senior year of high school, which I mean, I still don't I still shake my head at it. Like I think the whole thing is weird. You know what I just talked to a bunch of different people. And I tried to love people, I was probably better at loving other people than I wasn't loving myself. So it's kind of nice to know that, you know, that whatever. You know, what's that? What's that? Stuart Smalley looks in the mirror. And he's like, Gosh, darn it, people like me, whatever. But, so that another time in place. Okay. But here's the thing. So when I started thinking about the superlatives, and when I started thinking about voted most likely to, you know, die petty, something I shouldn't, what these things reveal these, like, how would you vote yourself? Or how would other people vote you write most likely to what like, fill in the blank? Okay. I started to think about like, whoa, this could be a really great way to like, identify our patterns, our habits, like how we show up in the world? What are some of the things that we habitually do? What are the some of the things that

that may be for better or for worse, let me put it that way. And this is how I eventually again, like I said, I use this at my retreat to kind of talk about this. So here's the Cliff Notes version of this if you want to play along at home, because I always say we can't change jack shit, until we are aware that there is a problem. Or we also can't often celebrate things. If we don't know that, you know, it's a strength of us. So I think that this little exercise is really fun and fantastic for a couple of reasons. Number one, because it can help us to identify habits and patterns that we have both that we no longer want to have write shit like stuff, we want to change stuff that needs to be changed stuff that we're ready to change. It helps us to and I'm going to show you how in a minute right Okay, and then it also shows us things that maybe we have blind spots to in the positive that we're not aware of. So this can be a great thing to do on your own. It can also be be a great thing to do with your best friend or your sweetie. Or, I mean, I don't know, your family can be a little tough because sometimes they're they got you in that ancient box, and they don't want to let you out. So they're still thinking of you, like when you were 12, or 15, or 21. They don't want to actually see your growth as a human. But people you trust, that's what I would say, ask people you trust people who you know, have your best interests at heart, people who love you. So I would say ask your balcony people if you're gonna play this game with them, okay. But you can definitely do this yourself, if you're willing, to be honest, and to kind of take what they say and 12 Step programs like a fearless moral inventory, right? If you're willing to really take a look at yourself, and not pretend like you're not that way, when pretty much everybody around you would say like, No, that's a thing. Right? Okay, so here's the thing. This could be number one, a great way to do it. Because it's going to, if you really look at what you would be voted most likely to what that tells us is is that this is that a repetitious characteristic of your personality. Okay. And also, here's the thing, let me just slide in a little spiritual nugget here, right? These are talking about your patterns, your behaviors, maybe things? How do I say your patterns or behaviors of your personality, but who you really are is one of God's kids like who you are as a divine being, who you are as a spirit, that that, that that's perfect, that's unchanging, that's eternal, you're already worthy, you're already lovable, you're already fantastic. These are usually tweaks that have to do with our ego, personality, and maybe coping mechanisms or strategies that developed out of maybe trauma or things that aren't so great. So this isn't about shaming yourself. This isn't about making yourself feel bad. This isn't about attacking yourself. This is just about taking a look at some of the obvious stuff. And why number two, this can be a good a fantastic way to do it is because it's fun, and you can make it funny. Like the truth was, I'm complaining and I wasn't really complaining. But you know, I'm like, why is he stalking me? Well, why is he because I've created a pattern of giving snacks. So now mom is the snack giver. So they know and bunchy is smart. So he's like, Oh, she's out. She's making some of the might be a carrot in my future. Whatever. Right? So it's like, okay, so you gotta laugh about it. Because it's true. I always say it's funny because it's true. And humor. Humor Did you know this you guys humor and laughter are really great pattern interrupts I'm also want to be clear. I am not a fan of things like practical jokes. I'm not a fan of being mean to people in laughing at them, or, you know, saying something really cutting, like cutting and cruel. And then going home. I'm just kidding. That's passive, aggressive, passive aggressive bullshit. I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about being able to take a look at yourself and laugh and go, Yeah, that's kind of true. I do do that, don't I? Right. And we all know we have tendencies. We all know if we're willing to be honest, right? None of us are perfect. All of us are works in progress. All of us have shit that we do. That could maybe be a little like murder, maybe not. Maybe not the best, right? But we can also use this when we're playing detective. And we're trying to identify these patterns and habits. We can do it in a way where we also celebrate the things that we are also most likely to. So let me just give you an A couple of examples. All right, maybe here's some shit you might want to change. I'm just making I'm making these up. So if they land for you, they land for you. But you can certainly come up with your own. If you wouldn't be voted most likely to not leave a good tip to the server. Right? That's not necessarily a Monica that's not necessarily a superlative or a title that you want right? Most likely to drink until a blackout. Probably not a good one right most likely to show up two hours late, most likely to flake on doing their part of the business thing, right, whatever it is. So we want to take a look at what are the patterns and behaviors and the habits that we consistently do that are most likely to hit snooze 10 times and be late for the bus right? Most likely to not turn in their homework, mostly whatever they are. I'm not judging any of these. I'm just giving you a plethora of examples so that you can maybe identify like, oh yeah, most likely to wait to the last minute, most likely to not balance your checkbook. Most Likely to whatever it is, right? So we can all look at those things in ourselves. Those things that maybe we're like, Huh? Yeah, yeah, yikes. I might want to merge, I might want to do something about that. Right. I want to change that I might want to take a peek see a little looky loo, write a little looky loo with that and say, Yeah, I would be voted most likely to okay. But let's also, if we're going to take a look at the stuff that may be could use our attention, some places where we are have a little weakness, or we have a little, you know, maybe there's some pattern, some addiction, some things that you're ready to change, right, and you gotta be willing, like, again, you can't make anybody, you can't make grown ass adults to do things. And even if you do make them do things, they'll probably revert going right back to doing it again later, because they're not doing it for the right reasons. And they're not doing it for themselves. So if if as you're doing your own voted most likely to exercise, right, if we're going to do the ones on things we might want to change. Let's also take some time to do the ones that we might like to keep and we might like to celebrate. So again, ask people who love you. Hey, what would I be voted most likely to ask for the positive ones. Because some people might just see it as an open, it's open season, I'm just going to open the door. And you could just say whatever credit crazy shit you want about me, that's not what this is. So ask the people who are truly your balcony people and truly who love you. Because once you collect some of these things, and I think the first person you should ask again, is yourself, I think other people telling you so you can do like do it yourself. And if in the beginning, maybe you can't come up with some of the positive ones. I'm sure you and your inner critic, that part of you. That is keeping a running tally of all the times you fucked up, screwed up, blew it. It was like not kind, blah, blah, blah. You probably have plenty of those. We're not using this as a weapon to beat ourselves up. Number one. Okay. So please don't use it that way. This is just bringing some awareness of like, oh, yeah, maybe I just want to take a little look at that. Okay. Also, if you can't come up with some positive stuff right away, which makes me kind of sad to think about that you can't think of a couple of fun or funny or sweet or kind things. But let's say you get stuck, okay, you're not having the ability to be able to, to see yourself clearly. Right? You're not You're not looking at your your, your, your Divine Spark, then ask some of your friends. Right? And because they might trigger some truth in you and make you go like, Oh, yeah, I am. I am kind to animals or Oh, yeah, I do. I am most likely to stop and make wishy washy noises like what would you what would you like at you know, at a baby are like, Oh, I am most likely to help an injured bird or I am most likely to. Here's the thing, right? You might be voted most likely to always make too much food, right? Because maybe you love to feed your friends or you voted most likely to the one who always remembers birthdays or you might be voted most likely as the one who loves to make soup. For her sick friends, you might be voted most likely to you know what I'm saying? Look for the good. My last episode, I

think we talked about like looking for the helpers, right? Being one of the helpers, but look for the good too. And I'm gonna do a whole podcast on this another time. But here's a little little nugget of a fun exercise that you can do. And then you should write them down so that you can see them so that you can remind yourself about the things you're most likely to, in a good sense. And then take a get, excuse me, take a gander at the other ones that maybe aren't so comforting and and so soothing and just go like, yeah, you know, and pick one, pick one that you want to work on. There might be a few things that you're like, oh, yeah, okay. But don't overwhelm yourself and don't overwhelm you and overwhelm your nervous system. And please, for the love of all things holy. Do not use this fun little exercise as a way to tear yourself down. We're always moving in the direction of progress. This is a process. This is not a tool to use to make yourself feel like crap. Okay, that's not what that's not what the Karen Kenny show is about. I am about being honest. I am about being sometimes direct. I am about like taking a look in that soul mirror and saying like, Okay, I've been up to some shenanigans that aren't that great. This is not leading me in the direction of who and how I really want to be in the world. This is creating, you know, patterns and habits that actually aren't very loving or helpful to myself or to others around me, okay, but we're not going to use it to shit on ourselves. That's that's not the purpose here. So I hope that this is helpful in some way. I hope it's a fun little thing, a fun little game that you can play with yourself or your girlfriends or your buddies or your sweetie or whoever, right? Your sibling, some of you have families where, you know, you get together and you do game night or you do fun night. And I think this could be a really, and it will probably make you laugh, because you probably have like inside jokes and inside stories and things and you'll just start laughing like voted most likely to, you know, like, I don't know, you know, I don't know, I don't want to, I can say some crazy. So, but, but play along. And then if you do this, let me know how it goes, I would be really fascinated. To see how it lands for you. I know how it went for the people at the retreat. But I would love to hear it from from your POV from your point of view. So here you go, you guys. And here's another question to ask, okay, what would you like to be voted most likely to? What's one of your core values that you're like, Yeah, this is one I really want to strengthen or this is one where I really want to shine a light on because I would love to be voted most likely to fill in the blank. Okay, because that will also give you a little insight into your dreams. Right? So I you know what I'm saying like vote, I would love to be voted most likely to have a New York Times best selling book or voted most likely to, you know, whatever it is, right? Have a baby or whatever the thing is, because it will often reveal to you the deepest part of your hearts, right the heart of your heart, it will kind of shine a light on, you know, that part of you that still is willing to dream big. And that's wicked important too. It's one of the things I see in adults is, you know, we become old and then we become old. You know what I'm saying we grow up we quote unquote, grow up. And we forget to dream, we forget to dream big. So this is an invitation to that as well. All right, you guys have a fantastic rest of the day, you who is listening to me right now. Thank you so much for being here. I superduper. Appreciate it. I appreciate you. I hope you have a stellar rest of your day. And I hope you get voted most likely. Something that lights your hat up makes you feel good makes you feel like you're a little bit lighter. And that you feel more in touch with yourself and you see your brilliance. I always say we got to be willing to own both our brilliance and our bullshit, right? We got to take a look at those blind spots, but not in a way where we're tearing ourselves down or being mean or unkind or cruel to ourselves. This isn't about brutal honesty. I'm not into brutal honesty. I always say honesty without compassion is brutality. So honest, right? compassionate and honest looking. That's what's interesting to me. All right, you guys, wherever you go, may you leave the planet, the environment, the people, the animals, you interact with yourself, please, wherever you go, leave them better. Leave yourself better than how you first found them wherever you go, may you and your presence and your love and whatever you're bringing with you, right. May you leave people better off for you having been there. Wherever you go. May you be a blessing. Bye