Building Strong Relationships for Effective Communication with Lindsey Cash

Melinda

Welcome to the Speak Flow podcast, dear listeners, where we share unique experiences to help you unleash your leadership voice. Today we have Lindsay Cash. She's a marketing manager for Libertines. She's been doing it two years and she's going to share some wonderful, um, takeaways, strategies to help you.

uplevel your communication. But this is in terms of building relationships, which I think a lot of people think about what to say, how to say it, and then they forget the whole relationship aspect of it. So I'm so glad Lindsay's here. Thank you for joining us, Lindsay. Thank you for having me. I'm excited to be here.

Yay, me too. Let's dive in. So before we get to the meat of it, it's so fascinating. You walked the talk in terms of Uh, relationship building. Can you share with us how, what you do now, but then also how you got there? Which is fascinating to me. Yeah,

Lindsey

so I'm a marketing manager at Libertines. I basically manage all of the U.

S. initiatives for marketing. For example, I'm currently Rebuilding our digital presence through website design. I also help with sponsorships at industry events and build connections and partnerships with other companies in the industry. Uh, I got this role from a previous job I was doing. So I was a general manager and marketing manager for ED now corporation.

I'm going to go ahead and start the presentation. a small business in a small corporation where we had rental properties, apartments, cars, and hosted events. And the CEO of Libertines actually came as a customer. Renting an apartment and a car from us. But we like to sit down with a lot of people that rent from us, kind of understand what they're doing here, how we can help them and do some consulting.

So I started CEO. Um, Um, with his English pronunciation, since he was just coming to the U S hadn't been here too much. And then he saw the amazing work that I'd been doing for Evie now and said, when I come back, I want you to work for me and do marketing for my company. So just like we're talking about, like building that relationship, communicating our value propositions and how we can meet each other and help each other.

So that was really awesome.

Melinda

And have you worked with. on this? Like, does it come naturally to you? Or are there certain things that you've done to really refine this level of relationship building?

Lindsey

Yeah, I think I've always been inclined to build strong relationships with people. I'm a very social person and really value having a strong network of connections.

But also that, That CEO or president of Evie now always pushed me to find a value in everything, find the value in every person. And so definitely he helped me refine that, but it was also kind of just a

Melinda

natural instinct as well. Right, right. So it's a natural instinct and curiosity and then, and then take it a little step further to find the value in other people and take that time to do that.

Yeah, and recognize to like the value you can offer to other people, and you know have a mutual relationship of giving and taking.

Right, right. And knowing when to do that, right? When can I give something and when, um, this person can also benefit from me and, you know, just like you said, vice versa, like a giving and taking or, I don't know, sending and receiving, however you want to put it.

Lindsey

Yeah, yeah. But taking that time to get to know somebody. That's um, meeting them where they're at. You talked a little bit about like what you do with your teams, um, and because you're in charge of relationship building, you're in charge of, um, you're in at the industry events. You said like building the relationships.

How do you do that with new people?

Yeah, with new people, it takes a couple things, like first I always notice body language, like, does this person really want to be talking to me? Where are their feet pointed? Where are their shoulders pointed? If they're fully focused in the conversation? I also have a background in psychology, so I think that helps as well, like understanding their facial expressions, because a lot of people, I mean, Body language is the universal language.

So you can only say so much with your words. But a huge thing that I focus on too is finding a common ground. I work with people all sorts of ages and sometimes it's difficult to find how we can relate to each other and build a friendship outside of a work relationship. So I usually try to see if we have a favorite sports team or favorite activity or favorite food and then You'll see people's faces light up and that's where the real communication starts when you're talking about something you both love.

Melinda

Right. I mean, do you think that that those type of questions are just general, like they work, like doesn't matter what generation you're in? Like,

yeah, yeah. Sometimes like, usually I'll point out, Oh, I really liked your t shirt. Where did you get that? Or, you know, your style or, um, just something that I could pinpoint that's visual.

That's not like an interrogation question to like figure out how we can relate, like just to keep it very organic and natural. And sometimes it doesn't work, Like sometimes you just can't build that communication with someone for whatever reason it may be. And knowing when to step away and to, you know, stop trying because trying too hard can also hurt.

Lindsey

Yes. And how do you know, how do you personally know, like when it's something, okay, I'm going to stop this person,

what are the signals? Yeah, usually if, like, they're not showing any signs of enjoying the conversation, so they're not smiling, even if you try to say something funny, they're looking in other directions, looking for somebody else to talk to, very short in response, like, that's usually when I know, okay, this person's kind of cold to me, and, you know, I can respectfully leave the conversation like, Oh, it was really great chatting with you.

I hope to, you know, link up with you at the event or later on. And usually I can try again and be like, Oh, hey, how's it going? And usually if they don't respond, then, you know, okay. That's what to give up on, which I often run into sometimes in an industry full of, you know, tech experts and engineers and be not coming from that background.

I also just have to accept, like, I don't speak the same language as them, no matter how hard I try. Um, so

Melinda

have you, um, had a moment where you took it like personally or are you just,

Lindsey

yeah. Yeah, I think when I first started, especially when I first started in sales at Lucid Motors, I was selling electric vehicles, luxury cars.

Um, it, I did take it personally sometimes because it felt like, oh, am I not good at my job? Like, am I not, you know, Am I not a good salesperson? But that's kind of moments where I would lean on my team, like those strong connections that I've built and relationships that I've built for support. And they'll be like, no, Lindsay, that's not what's happening here.

Or it's good that you recognize this. How can we approach it better next time? So in moments where I sometimes would be hard on myself, then I lean on my other relationships to kind of help me see it in a better light.

Melinda

Right. Oh, I love that. Right? Because I mean, you have the people that you do trust and you have them to lean on.

They're there to listen to, to help you like think through things, how engagement or conversation did go. What am I learning? Because yeah, we're not going to all, you know, know everything straight out the gate. Like it's just doesn't happen. But it doesn't mean that you stop going out to have these interactions where some people would if it's They take it so personally and then, yeah.

But you continue to, to work at it, continue to develop it and go back out there. Well, that's one of your deal the marketing manager now in charge of, yeah, doing lots of different relationship building.

Lindsey

Yeah. I think too, I always remind myself like this conversation that may have felt like the end of the world to me is like one or two or three minutes out of their day.

And they're probably thinking about something else. They're not gonna remember this. And if they do, then, you know. They won't remember it a couple months from now to reminding that, you know, you're your own worst enemy. Sometimes making yourself feel like things are the end of the world when really it's just a small snippet of someone's day and a small snippet of yours as well.

Melinda

Right. Right. It's just a snapshot. Right. So how do you, do you see people not focusing on relationships? Like, are there people at your work where they're really not relationship building in terms of communication?

Lindsey

Yeah, I would say in my current. Yeah, my current role, like everyone is, is very caring for one another, like meets each other where they're at, wants to communicate, wants to have a personal relationship and not just a working relationship.

And that's something that I really value. In previous jobs, I have seen people who have lost opportunity and lost success. By not building relationships, like people who are great at their jobs, great sales people, you know, go getters, but they will make decisions that will hurt the team, they will be selfish, they won't communicate their needs, and they won't communicate who they are as an individual and kind of guard that so much to where there's a lot of distrust.

And there's been times where, you know, I've. Had a team where everyone is really close. Everyone likes to hang out or chat. I mean, you don't need to hang out outside of work. Like while you're at work, you can talk about different things, sports, like I said, food, whatever it may be, but this individual chose not to do that.

And it was like a group. And then this individual, and eventually that led and spread throughout the organization. And that individual lost. You know, promotion opportunities was stuck in the same role for multiple years, and it's unfortunate because I put in the effort to try to beat this person on a personal level, and they're a great person.

They're very funny. Like, I found so many great qualities within them, but since they weren't willing to share that with the rest of the team, it hurt them and their future career.

Melinda

You know, it's really interesting because you took the level and the time to actually talk to that person. Do you get the sense where they just don't trust people?

Like, what is the reason for them not wanting to open up?

I think it was a level of trust. I think it was also a feeling of, you know, taking the work and personal life separation too seriously. I think some people misunderstand that like, no, you don't have to talk about your family, what you do outside of work, like you can protect that, but parts of your personality and the reason why you do things and that kind of just genuine respect to explain that to other people like that.

Is not just your personal life that should also be in your work life. But yeah, I think it was like, uh, I don't owe anybody anything type of attitude. Right. And since other people weren't trying as hard to kind of break that barrier, like I was, they just thought like, it's not worth worth my time. But unfortunately that did hurt them at the end of the day.

Yeah, so if anybody is out there and feeling like, Oh, I don't owe anybody anything on this team. And there's a part of it that is correct. Like you don't, you don't owe anything. However, I think it's like learning when it is okay to share things at a more deeper level. Because then that creates teamwork that creates collaboration that creates trust.

I think it's a very slight nuance way, right? I think maybe it's also their energy. Maybe there's a guard, if someone's sensing a guard within you, regardless of what you're sharing, you can be sharing anything actually, but there's still a guard up that doesn't matter. I think that maybe it's the going into.

Almost like a feeling a trust and intuition, um, which is really refined in terms of how we communicate. Uh, because there are some, a lot of people that may be sharing just some, but then their energy and their openness, um, they may not share a lot, but their energy and openness is there. Um, and, and so like for you, if I'm feeling guarded and And only sharing bits.

That's even worse. I think you just have to monitor and like you said, not it doesn't have to be everything. It doesn't have to be personal stuff, but know for yourself first. Where's my energy? How open am I? And then second, yeah, what is the content that I'm okay to share? And like, you know, some things don't have to be shared.

Some things can be shared, but knowing the audience and what is necessary to build that trust. Because at the end of the day, if you are there as a team, your goal is to be a part of the team and you got to know how much is necessary to build that trust.

Lindsey

Yeah, I think to like, yeah, it is a came out. I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's

Melinda

a very nuanced thought.

How can I build trust with this team?

Lindsey

Yeah, I think to like, by letting down your barriers, you also have to just accept that you're not always right. I think with that individual as well. There was a lot of Thinking that, oh, the company wants me to do this, but I don't agree. So instead of trying to understand why they want me to do this or trying to explain why I disagree, it's just like more guards are put up.

Yeah, I think that's something that's really helped me in communication is I'm not always right. Most of the time I'm not right. Uh, because in order to be right, I need to consider Everyone and every aspect of the business. And so, you know, if somebody also is telling you an idea, there is some truth to it instead of like completely shutting it down, being open to understand why they're saying this, where did it come from?

How does it relate to my ideas? Like, how can we find a common ground? I think that's what you were saying. Just like complete openness to the situation and removing those defenses. Because, you know, not one individual needs to be right in a team. Everybody needs to agree on one

Melinda

idea or a couple. Exactly, exactly.

So having that open mindset to go in there versus avoid it, um, to go in there with curiosity, I think like the people that are guarded, um, that they sense that they'd rather avoid it or. They may lash out later on, you know, so it's like, yeah, unfortunately, or maybe like, like you said, he ends up a year, she ends up getting, yeah, their promotions, other people are getting promoted, they end up feeling excluded.

So we don't want that either to for for the leaders out there who want to make an impact and want to make a difference. It is. building that relationship with the people around you. Um, it's a skill set. It's not something that a lot of us are born with. So it's like, how do we continue to develop that?

Lindsey

Yeah. And I mean, I've definitely seen people who have learned that over time, like the previous boss that basically helped me like find value in myself, find value in other people, in any interaction, like he was not trained that way. He was not born that way, but he taught himself to learn that, to study a little bit more psychology, to be able to build those relationships because he realized that's what he was missing out on and what made him miss opportunities.

Uh, like. Once he reached 50, he couldn't find a job, couldn't be promoted and all of, you know, a common issue in today's world. Um, so he decided to become a business owner and really push himself to communicate with people, to be able to build those relationships, to be funnier, to be more relatable just to everybody.

And that's something that I really look up to as well. It's like, you don't need to always accept what you're born into. You can always transform yourself and grow. Oh, I

Melinda

love that. Speaking of which, so Lindsay, I'd like to ask, um, like I asked all my guests, the, the golden takeaway. What is a leadership golden takeaway that you want people to remember?

Lindsey

I would say just to show genuine concern for the people that you're leading, it goes a long way to ask your team, how are you feeling today? How much energy do you have? How much sleep did you get? How can I support you where you're at? More on a personal, emotional, physical level, and not always in the work sense.

Because once you show that genuine care for the people that you're leading, they're going to feel more inclined to move towards a similar goal as you. But if it's always just work talk, or the deliverables, or whatever it may be, and you're not seeing the person for who they are as an individual, You know, then, then you can't be a well oiled machine.

You know, the genuine care, they'll show it back. And if they don't, then you can find another way to relate, but that's my golden rule always, you know, listen to the person as the individual, not just the employee.

Melinda

Oh, I love that. And then you'll help them bring their whole self into the, into work. Exactly.

Yeah. Versus themselves. Thank you, Lindsay. That was amazing. So glad you're a part of the podcast. I took away a lot of tons of valuable information and insights. I really appreciate your time. And I trust that the listeners also have taken away. Their gold and takeaways too. Yeah. Thank you so much. It was great.

Thank you. Take care until next time listeners. See you later.