WINNING AT LIFE with Howard Brown

Howard. Hello. It's Howard brown. It's the

Shining Brightly Show. So glad to have you here. This is a

really cool episode 100 it's my 100th episode. I'm so excited. I

started this back in February of 23 and today is episode 100 what

a great milestone. Celebrate the success. So for those of you

that don't know me, I am affectionately known as Mr.

Shining Brightly. I'm putting on my golden white shades right

now, and I'm reflecting sunshine and light everywhere. I'm just

really happy to be here. For those that you will see some

video clips I want to show you. I'm wearing my little sunshine

pin with my shades on, and also I have the grateful live shirt,

so I look like the Grateful Dead band, but I'm really grateful to

be alive and with you here today. So it's amazing. Well, I

have to tell you, this is going to be a little bit of a

different show, because you get me solo, I'm not interviewing a

guest. I'm basically interviewing myself today, and

this is a solo episode. And for those of you that have been

tuning in and been touched by my platform here, my broadcast, my

entertainment value, I intend to motivate, educate and inspire

every single week. And another milestone that I've hit is

200,000 downloads. So this is an amazing way to celebrate a 100th

episode and also 200,000 downloads. So the show is going

to go like this. I'm going to actually do a little bit of a

reflection of what's been happening over the last two

years, since my book was published, since my memoir, and

then I'm going to talk about the present, and then I'm going to

plan for the future, and I'm going to be talking about great

success and wins little ones too, and then also some hurdles

that we all have in life. And it's what an amazing ride. So,

so thrilled that I'm sharing this time with you now. You

know, my episodes are short. They're about 27 minutes, so

I'll keep it to that, maybe a little bit less, and we'll do a

little bit of reflection right now. So one is I look in a

mirror every single day, and I'm going to actually hold up a

little baby mirror. This is the mirror that I gave out to the

cancer patients at Dana Farber Cancer Institute. It says, I

like me. Now there's a chapter in the book on that. It's

chapter five, and when you look in the mirror to put on your

makeup or shave, many people do not like what they see. So they

don't like their lives, they don't like their appearance,

they don't like their attitude, they don't like their

relationships too fat, too skinny, all that stuff is out

there. And you need to start the day, okay, by looking in the

mirror and counting your blessings. And I say, I am

blessed. Then you need to actually show some gratitude and

say what you're thankful for, just getting up in the days is,

you know, for many, even cancer patients, that's, that's, that's

what you're doing, you're getting up that day. But for

others, you're actually going to work. And you've got fun things

planned, but you've got hard things to deal with and but you

got to be thankful. Then I always say, I am lucky, and

that's the ability to basically just show appreciation. And so I

know I'm lucky. And for my two time cancer survivorship stage

four, I know I'm lucky. So then you have the ability to look in

that mirror and say, How can I lift myself up and then, how can

I lift up others? Simple. That's the shiny, brightly movement.

That's the brand I've been building. How can you lift

yourself up each day to a better place and go lift up others? And

the shortcut is to choose kindness. This is Chapter One of

my book from Bubby Bertha, lived to 101 stuck in Belgium before

she could come over in the early 1900s as a like 1516, year old.

Anyways, that's chapter one of my book. So choose kindness.

Then you can also choose to be healing for yourself and others.

Take care of yourself, your emotional well being, your

physical well being, financial well being and in relationship.

I preach that all the time. You. Got to take care of those four

areas. And I call that for myself, putting Humpty, Dumpty

back together again, over and over again, which I have proven

to do. It's not easy, but it's necessary. And then you can

choose to heal others. You can choose joy. What joy can you

bring to yourself and others? And that is just simple, okay?

Joy through kindness, Joy through gratitude. It all

reflects back. It's all intertwined. It's all kind of

meshed together. So choose joy you have that opportunity to do

that each day, then you can choose what not to do. Here's

the discipline, here's the mental toughness, to choose not

to hate, choose not to hate, choose to be accepting of

others. Learn from them, learn the special stuff about them,

their culture, their foods, their history. You don't have to

agree. Many of them don't, but we live in a world where we're

all not the same. That's that's later in my book. That's the

world's a big place. It's an interfaith world. So you need to

actually understand that and have that discipline of what not

to choose. And as I say, if we do this and we join the shining

brightly movement, okay, we can build a better world. We can be

a force multiplier for good and positive change. It's done every

day, and in your small way, you can do it, and in your

neighborhoods, when you join forces with others, and you join

forces with me, and I joined forces with other networks, we

show we can't do this each and every day. So that's my opening.

That's how you get it. That's what we're doing. Now I want to

tell you that, from a cancer standpoint, big anniversary for

me. This is, this is a show of big wins, huge wins. On

September 20, I actually, through the summer, took blood

tests, I took CT scans, CAT scans, and I actually had an

annual colonoscopy, and it actually had polyps. It was a

little scary for a moment, but those polyps were benign. My

scans were clean, my blood tests, and it is great. It's all

good, all normal. And this is my fifth year being cancer free.

Just let that sink in for a second. Take a moment think

about that. The odds of be living five years were very

small. 4% chance of living actually a year when you get

metastatic cancer, and I had metastatic colon cancer that

spread to my peritoneum, which is my stomach lining my omentum,

my stomach lining my liver, major organ, my bladder. The

chances of living were not long. My life flock was shrinking, and

now I got it back again, and get to put Humpty, Dumpty version

three, oh, as a work in progress, back together. And we

are just a work in progress in so many areas, but cancer free,

and we call that no evidence of disease at this time, Ned. And a

lot of us like to say we're dancing with Uncle Ned, and we

want to keep dancing with Uncle Ned. So I'm dancing with Uncle

Ned. That's a big Amen and a big Hallelujah. Now, looking back

over the last couple of years, the book came out September 27

basically October. And I spent three and a half years writing

Shining Brightly, thank you. David Crom, thank you. Front End

Publishing. Thank you. Read the Spirit Magazine. Thank you for

the 158 most important influential people in my life

that I interviewed over that three and a half year period. To

get the transcripts from zoom, thank you zoom to become draft

chapters get edited and become an actual book. And for those

that are listening, I'm holding up a copy of Shannon Brady. It's

a picture over my shoulder too, but I'm holding up the actual

hard knock of the book. This was my memoir. This is how to live a

resilient life with hope and with that also, I had discussion

resource guides. I have survivorship, okay and

resiliency. How to build true resiliency? Have mentorship as

leadership and entrepreneurship. Being a mentor makes this world

a better place. Being a mentee and allowed to be guided makes

this world a better place. And then interfaith bridge building.

do you do this work? Why should. We be like Abraham and Sarah and

Why

let the stranger into our tent and feed them and be kind to

them. That's how we're supposed to live a good life. Some other

memories. Got to watch over the last five years my daughter

graduated high school wasn't a guarantee for me. Darren, she

graduated from the University of Michigan, summa cum laude,

amazing. And she's working as a TV reporter at capex TV in

Missoula, Montana, living her best life climbing mountains.

Has a year long boyfriend, Chris, gonna meet him soon, and

Lisa and I celebrated 30 years of marriage, major

accomplishments, major beautiful, beautiful memories,

and I've been able to travel and speak and visit great places.

Been back home to Boston for my 40th reunion. Last week,

amazing, just to reconnect with people that I went to high

school with, and I asked them three questions. I conducted a

social experiment. We just didn't drink and eat. I asked

them, How did they bring joy to their lives. I ask them, what

gives them hope? And then lastly, I asked them if they're

having a good life. And I'm going to compile all those

responses into a beautiful article for read the spirit in

the coming weeks that I will share out there. And I've really

just changed from scratch. I started the shining brightly

brand. I started the shining brightly movement, which

comprises of assets called the book, my speaking, my

motivational speaking, and my facilitating workshops and my

speaking at fundraisers. I love it. And then this podcast, which

has been the most amazing experience I have, episodes in

the can up to 107 and each week you can go back and look at the

archive and learn something, learn about the human resolve of

the individuals that I interviewed. Learn what they

they actually lessons. Learned what they learned. Learned how

they lifted themselves up, learned how they get out of the

walk with darkness and how they lifted up others. And at the end

of every show, we put on those sunglasses, and we end up

shining to the world together, and then you can go get in touch

with them and continue that conversation. I love this

platform, and it's been incredible. And so now it's the

Jewish holidays, so it's a time of reflection. So I've been

really doing a lot of reflection. And I ask you, do

you know thyself? Do you really know yourself? Or you just

surfing along? You know, at the top level there, you got to know

yourself. How are you feeling? What do you want to do

differently? It's not going to come overnight. It takes time.

It takes work. Rebuilding Humpty. Dumpty, for me has been

a lot of work, emotionally, physically, financially and in

relationships, tons of work. What is your ability to bounce

back? I had Dr Robert Wicks, the grandfather of resilience, write

the forward of my book. He's written 33 books on the topic. I

say, when we get knocked down, as we do in life and in business

and in health and in relationships, you have to get

back up again. You can walk in that darkness, learn those

lessons, but you've got to relight your flame. And how do

you do that? Well, I tell people to go, help someone else. Go

light their flame, and that lights your flame. Go allow

people to light your flame. I had 1000s upon 1000s of people

praying for me during my cancer treatments. I had 1000s of

people sending me books and movies and jokes and hugs

because it was sometime during the pandemic too, and that

helped light my flame. And that's the simple message. It's

not one of the basic truths of my book, is not what we get in

life, it's it's what we give, go out there and give givers get.

So I'm really grateful. The other thing is that I'm

continually learning and. As I interview these people, and I

they share their stories of life and hardship and also in

celebration and in business and in health, I'm learning, and

that's the way to self improvement is to allow you to

be able to do that. Also you have to set goals. Like really

good friend Deb Ackerley. She's basically sets. Her middle name

is setting goals. And she's got a new book coming out, the 52

secrets to goal setting, which, I mean, it's coming out in

January. I'm so excited. Shout out to you, Deb Ackerling, and

that's really, really important, and finding your purpose. I

found my purpose. I am Mr. Shining Brightly. This is what I

want to do. This is what I want my career to be. This is what I

want my life to be. It can be done. We can get back up again.

We can get what we want. You can build an abundant life, and also

another shared book coming out with my time I paid shining

brightly for with abundance coming out in the garden of

connection, coming out in January, February too. So

excited for these major milestones as well. And you can

be adaptable and you can transform. And one of the keys

to doing that is knowing thy authentic self and being

intentional about your well being. That's part one. Part

two, the present day. Where are we at right now? Let's evaluate

so I have to tell you, my health is great, but I suffer. I suffer

all the chemotherapy, the trauma that I've been through, that I'm

still processing today. Let's be honest. Okay, cancer affects the

individual. Your caregivers. God bless. The 85 million caregivers

are out there taking care of somebody, unpaid, by the way,

whether it's an older adult parent or relative a young child

or someone who's sick. There's other definitions of caregiver.

Thank you to our caregivers. Well, I'm out there at my last

episode, Episode 99 was I'm grateful for my nurses and my

doctors and the staff, but I spent a lot of time with my

nurses, a lot of time with nurses, and they were there to

comfort me and care for me, and in emergency, deal with tough

situations. I deal with chemo brain. Chemo brain is PTSD. No

one would really know where to recognize it, but I have trouble

recognizing names some things I don't remember. Maybe it's just

getting old, right? Maybe I'm just can't remember s disease,

right? But it's had some effect on me. The other thing is that

my fingers and toes, they're stinging. They're numb. How do I

even shoot a basketball? Most people don't even realize it. I

can't feel the ball. This isn't it crazy. So I have chemo

induced peripheral neuropathy that's probably stage three, and

it's never going to go away. Those cancer patients that have

it from the toxicity of cancer, sometimes it goes away, and it

takes years. Some people lucky enough to get it taken away. So

I try with arthritis, screams and rubs and other things, but

not happening with me, but I have it, and I deal with it

every day, and I power through it. That's what you have to do,

right? And then also, I have digestive issues, and that's

just one of the consequences of having 23 inches of colon that's

been removed. And I deal with that, I just deal with it. And

some days are good, some days are worse, and you just get back

up again. And that's that's the Mental Toughness part of doing

that. I have financial toxicity. Cancer is not cheap. Cancer is

expensive if you don't have the right insurance. And before I

got on disability and got on Medicare, thank you, Blue Cross,

Medicare plus blue I got pounded with medical bills and still

dealing with some of that. It's horrific. And for all the people

dealing with that financial toxicity out there, it's it's no

fun. That's the real life that we face, and that's what I'm

facing right now as well. But Humpty, Dumpty three, three.

Dotto doing great. And I help people to find a happy place,

right? Find your happy place. Mine's

the basketball court. I played outdoors on Saturday. I played

indoors. On Sunday, not bad for a 58 year old, old guy, and just

sweating with the boys. It's my stress free zone. I love it, and

I will continue as long as I can continue to do it, but go find

yours. Is it yoga? Is it meditation? Is it cooking? Is it

travel? Is it the beach? Is it the mountains? Is it your

children? Is it your parents? Is it going to a movie? Is it just

taking a time out and eating popcorn? Go to a sporting event?

Write down what your happy place is and schedule it in. And some

of that happy place should be without your digital device

called your phone. Go walking without it. It'll be there when

you get back and then from the last chapter of my book, I want

to tell you that Sharon Hope. Hope is the fuel that lights

that fire that shines brightly inside all of us and inside

others, H, O, P, E, don't lose hope. And if you do lose hope,

you call me, or you call someone else that you know, and we'll

blow that hope right back into you. We'll build your Calvary

for you. Do not isolate. You can walk in darkness a little, but

if you need help, there's help for you. We'll find it together.

I mentor cancer patients, caregivers, students,

entrepreneurs, business folks. This is what coaching is, but I

call it mentorship, and I help and mentor lots of people. Just

need to reach out and I get mentored too. I become the

mentee. I became a big brother 42 years ago to Ian, who was 10.

He's now, I think he's now. 42 got a baby boy, noble wife,

Sarah, and maybe I did the math wrong, but one of the best

things I ever did, we embraced each other. We're family. That's

in my book as well. One of the best experiences I ever did was

become a big brother mentor, and thank you for those that are big

brother and sister mentors. And I allow myself to be mentored. I

allow people that have more experience or can see my blind

spots help me figure out how to navigate and transform, and I

allow that and allow that to and I learn from them. That's part

of becoming that lifelong learner. And I have a discussion

guide on mentorship is the lost art of leadership. Go mentor

others. Go allow yourself to be mentored. Do it with hope. All

right, the future. Now I'm going to continue to shine brightly,

going to continue to lift myself up and continue to help others,

but I got a couple of cool new projects that I'll let you get

on. I'm working towards an audio book. It's the number one

request that I get from everybody is to, can I listen to

your book? And I got a couple surprises with that, and I'm

trying to get that done. And there's a couple of ways I want

to do that, but that's that's on my pop to do list. I also have a

master class that I'm working on. Shout out to you. Yale

craft, one of my mentors and friends, and I call her the

flow. She lives in a flow state of letting the universe come to

her, and I'm learning all about that world on the go, Mr.

Resilience, Mr. Get Up And Go when you've been knocked down.

And so the flow and the go working on something very

special, very, very cool, and just collaboration is the way

that we move forward. And I'm still speaking. Please, please

contact me to speak. I'm still doing my advocacy work and the

Chairman of the Board of Powell Town Development Foundation.

We're running a fundraiser called the Colontown Quest. It's

so cool. You buy items and learn about how we help colorectal

cancer patients, caregivers and families every single day. It's

important to me because it helped save my life, help my

wife, get smart and be collaborative in our process

with my Docs and nurses and my care teams. And it works. Shout

out to colontown. Amazing helping people every single day.

Go to Colontown org. I'll take a timeout right now and say,

Listen, get screened. Don't get cancer, right? I wear my blue

shoes every day, basically to remind me to go get screened,

right? So for women, go get your mammogram, go see your lady

doctor. For men, go. Get your prostate checked for all of us,

go get your colon screening, either cologuard or a FIT test

or a blood test now, which is out and or go get the gold

standard colonoscopy. Shout out to cologuard and my friends at

exec science. So I just want you not to get this disease. It's a

horrible existence. It changes your whole world. You get

stopped right in your tracks. So go go to the dentist, because I

actually have implants now. Thank you chemotherapy, the gift

that keeps giving. I go get my ears checked, because I have

ringing in my ears. Thank you chemotherapy. Who wants that?

Stay, live a good life. Eat, right, exercise, right? Get

enough sleep, hydrate. That's what you got to do. Those are

the basics, right? Those are the basics. So I just, I want to

tell you that I'm just thrilled, thrilled where I'm at right now.

Lots of work to do. Got to go figure out the financial piece

for me, what I'm going to do, and go make a living for the

rest of my life and still help others, but that'll come in,

that'll come to place. So I just want you to look in. That's the

reflection. Is a look inward. See where you're at. See where

you are going by looking outward and what is around you, that's

what you need to do. So I'm going to put on my glasses.

We're going to shine brightly together, right? So for those my

glasses and I'm reflecting and shining out to you and the world

to be kind, be grateful, be healing. Find joy. Choose not to

hate. Choose that discipline. You can do it. Thank you to my

people that make me look good, front edge publishing, my book

publisher, David Crom, Susan Stett and the team, Read The

Spirit Magazine, my podcast, group that make me look so good

from Amplifyou. Thank you. You do an amazing job, week in and

week out, and I it's a great partnership. I can't do it

without you. And then Sunette van Bretta, the sole author

journey, which we get to co host with you on e3 60 TV that's

touching so many lives, the power hour. And then the

Tanzanite heroes of men and the diamond beauties for women. And

coming soon. Mr. Hot weekly Zoom is coming soon. Lots of great

stuff happening and so Diamond Moments Magazine, thank you.

Thank you for featuring my cover. Thank you for featuring

me in this podcast every month and featuring my articles as

well. I love it so you know what to do in order to shine brightly

just a little bit each day you shine brightly for yourself and

go lift up others in your family, in your neighborhood, in

your community, and then in the larger spheres, we join hands,

we become a force multiplier for good and positive change and

yes, we do make the world a better place. Thank you. I love

you. Keep listening and just go shine brightly every day. Keep

shining. I love you.