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Real Life Coaching: I’m doing something new! I invite you to listen in on a real unscripted coaching session with new coach Anna M. She comes with this question, “as an emerging coaching I would love to know how using my experience do I take my clients from ‘A to B’ and make the transformation complete. Not just inspire them but actually transform!” And then we coach. We collaborate and use her passion dedication and inspiration to understand how she can create the best bridge or program for her clients.
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>> https://candymotzek.lpages.co/coaching-with-candy/
Featured on The Show:
Welcome to she coaches coaches. I'm your host,
Candy Motzek:Kandi motsek. And I'm going to help you find the clarity,
Candy Motzek:confidence and courage to become the coach that you are meant to
Candy Motzek:be. If you're a new coach, or if you've always wanted to be a
Candy Motzek:life coach, then this is the place for you. We're going to
Candy Motzek:talk all about mindset and strategies and how to, because
Candy Motzek:step by step only works when you have the clarity, courage and
Candy Motzek:confidence to take action. Let's get started. Thank you for
Candy Motzek:agreeing to be coaching laser coaching client. What would you
Candy Motzek:like to be coached on today, Anna?
Anna Maydonova:Oh, candy, I'm so glad you asked me this
Anna Maydonova:question. As an emerging coach. I would love to know how using
Anna Maydonova:my story and my experience, though, I take my clients from A
Anna Maydonova:to B and make this transformation completed. How do
Anna Maydonova:I help them to transform not just inspire them, but
Anna Maydonova:transform?
Candy Motzek:transforming
Anna Maydonova:its way when they feel empowered and
Anna Maydonova:inspired. And they actually do this do this first steps. So how
Anna Maydonova:do I I build the bridge for them, not just beings wanting to
Anna Maydonova:do something, but actually doing this changes this
Anna Maydonova:transformation?
Candy Motzek:So you've got two thoughts that are happening
Candy Motzek:here. The one is is how to build the bridge that then you can
Candy Motzek:guide them on. And then the other is how to get them to keep
Candy Motzek:moving. which path do you want it? Which path is the more
Candy Motzek:important one for you right now?
Anna Maydonova:Probably How do I build the bridge? Okay. Okay.
Candy Motzek:So what does if you think of a bridge, it's on
Candy Motzek:land on one side, and it goes to land on the other side? And then
Candy Motzek:it has this span that often goes across water? What's the first
Candy Motzek:place like what what's the on ramp look like, for the people.
Anna Maydonova:It's probably the place where they start. They
Anna Maydonova:are right now. They have their challenges they want to
Anna Maydonova:overcome, but they don't know how. But they have an idea where
Anna Maydonova:they want to be. They have an idea what sort of person they
Anna Maydonova:want to be what sort of relationship they want to have,
Anna Maydonova:or work or wealth. But they just don't know how to get there. So
Anna Maydonova:how do I help them to build this bridge?
Candy Motzek:Yeah. So where they are right now is the place
Candy Motzek:of pain? Yes, actually. Right. And where they want to be is
Candy Motzek:that version of themselves. Where that that particular pain
Candy Motzek:is salt. And so the place that you might want to start looking
Candy Motzek:at is identifying what exactly is that discomfort? That they
Candy Motzek:want salt? And is that discomfort? Strong enough to get
Candy Motzek:them into motion? So that would be the first place that I would
Candy Motzek:look is like what? what's bugging them? And then so the
Candy Motzek:discomfort has to be strong enough for them to take action.
Candy Motzek:Higher you Where are they want to go where that dream is? It
Candy Motzek:has to be compelling enough. It has to pull them, right. It
Candy Motzek:can't just be I hate my I hate my job. I hate my life.
Anna Maydonova:Mm hmm.
Candy Motzek:That we never move from that place of it a light
Candy Motzek:just a place of May we never move. It has to be I can't stay
Candy Motzek:like this anymore. I'm not willing to stay like this. So
Candy Motzek:the discomfort has to be strong enough to get them in motion.
Candy Motzek:And then the dream has to be strong enough to pull them. So
Candy Motzek:that's the place you start helping them see how just how
Candy Motzek:much discomfort they're in how much pain they're in right now.
Candy Motzek:And help them feel the discomfort and the feeling of
Candy Motzek:the discomfort might be so much as like what's your life gonna
Candy Motzek:be like in five years if you stay here? Mm hmm. You know,
Candy Motzek:what's your relationship? with your wife or your husband or
Candy Motzek:your partner or your children going to be like if you stay in
Candy Motzek:this place of mystery?
Anna Maydonova:That's a good question.
Candy Motzek:Right? So how how can you help them to see not not
Candy Motzek:by making a like not by sensationalizing their
Candy Motzek:discomfort, but help them to really see the real discomfort
Candy Motzek:that they're experiencing? And then what's possible for you,
Candy Motzek:you know, what would life be like in that place? So that's
Candy Motzek:your first place, you want a strong foundation, a strong
Candy Motzek:onramp. And then you want a strong off ramp to, like, they
Candy Motzek:want to go to that tropical island, where the, you know,
Candy Motzek:warm sun is shining, and there's just light breezes, there's no
Candy Motzek:tidal waves, there's, you know, they want to go there. And so
Candy Motzek:what is that dream? And again, to help them really see that
Candy Motzek:dream, right? So talk to me about the to the on ramp and the
Candy Motzek:off ramp. What does that look like now for you now that you're
Candy Motzek:thinking in that way?
Anna Maydonova:Now, when people have a clear understanding where
Anna Maydonova:they're standing now, what they feel there is a clearer
Anna Maydonova:understanding what is going to be how their, how their life is
Anna Maydonova:going to look like, if they won't take this step, if they
Anna Maydonova:won't cross this bridge, and to understand the whole picture of
Anna Maydonova:their pain. And on another side, they finally have a clear vision
Anna Maydonova:of what their life will look like, if they make this step.
Anna Maydonova:That's what they were dreaming about. And it's probably, I see
Anna Maydonova:what you say, when you saying it's, it's brilliant, it's
Anna Maydonova:really brilliant. Because not many people even seeing what
Anna Maydonova:they want to do in five years time, or, you know, in 10 years
Anna Maydonova:time, or how they want their life to be. They're getting so
Anna Maydonova:caught up in a small things, that it's really wonderful to,
Anna Maydonova:to help them to understand. What is the bigger picture what is
Anna Maydonova:happening now? And what can happen. If you take these steps,
Anna Maydonova:I love it.
Candy Motzek:Oh, now, your next job is huge. So you know how
Candy Motzek:they're going to basically get in your car, right? You know,
Candy Motzek:your coaching practice your coaching program with them as
Candy Motzek:they're going to get into your car is the you know, like,
Candy Motzek:what's the car? Like? Is it a minivan? Is it a convertible? Is
Candy Motzek:it a Rolls Royce? Is it a Lamborghini? Like what is that
Candy Motzek:car? Right? So they're going to get in? Are they in the
Candy Motzek:passenger seat beside you? Or are they driving? Right? So now
Candy Motzek:you're going to get that in your head about? They're getting in
Candy Motzek:my car? What kind of a car do I have? Hmm. So what kind of a car
Candy Motzek:does it look like?
Anna Maydonova:thing comes into my head. It will be probably a
Anna Maydonova:big truck. And my clients will definitely drive it. Alright,
Candy Motzek:so where are you in the truck? And what kind of
Candy Motzek:truck is it?
Anna Maydonova:Um, it's a question.
Candy Motzek:First one that pops into your head. I don't
Candy Motzek:want you to question yourself. What did you see when you said
Candy Motzek:it's a big truck?
Anna Maydonova:It's a four wheel drive. Probably. Porsche
Anna Maydonova:Korean.
Candy Motzek:Excellent. Okay, great. What color is it?
Anna Maydonova:Dark. It's a it's a dark blue.
Candy Motzek:Right? So they get in the driver's seat. And where
Candy Motzek:are you?
Anna Maydonova:I'm next to the driver, driver's seat or
Anna Maydonova:passenger in the passenger
Candy Motzek:seat. Okay, do you have your seat belt on? Not?
Anna Maydonova:No, I definitely should put my seatbelt on.
Anna Maydonova:Because this speed we're gonna take off with is going to be
Anna Maydonova:big.
Candy Motzek:Okay. So they got into the Porsche Cayenne, dark
Candy Motzek:blue there. They hop into the driver's seat close that door.
Candy Motzek:They've got their seatbelt on. You're in the passenger seat.
Candy Motzek:You've got your seat belt on. Now what? What happens?
Anna Maydonova:Well, if they don't know how to drive a
Anna Maydonova:Porsche, I probably have to explain to them to put their
Anna Maydonova:head like how to switch on the car. How to start the how to
Anna Maydonova:start the car. How to drive But to know how to accelerate the
Anna Maydonova:speed.
Candy Motzek:Right? So that's the beginning of your program.
Candy Motzek:That's the beginning of how you can help them get the
Candy Motzek:transformation. So you help them learn where the dials are, how
Candy Motzek:to turn it on, how responsive it is whether they need to put gas
Candy Motzek:in the tank. So what does that look like for your program? I
Candy Motzek:mean, this is just like, yes, it's all pretending in our
Candy Motzek:imagination, but then take that and put that into what would
Candy Motzek:that be like talking to people?
Anna Maydonova:Hmm. It's probably trying to get into
Anna Maydonova:basic stuff. Probably working with mindset, with negative self
Anna Maydonova:talk, helping them to believe that they can do this, that they
Anna Maydonova:worthy, trying to show them the first steps, what I've done,
Anna Maydonova:because here, I'm just just thinking, relying on my
Anna Maydonova:experience, I know what steps I I've taken to start my healing
Anna Maydonova:journey. It took me many years, but yeah, I now I'm getting, I
Anna Maydonova:can speed up this process for my clients, just putting them on
Anna Maydonova:the right path on the right way.
Candy Motzek:So with the beginning steps, so just
Candy Motzek:paraphrasing what you said, just so that it gives you something
Candy Motzek:more to think about, they get in. So they chose to get in, you
Candy Motzek:didn't push them into the truck, they chose to get in, they close
Candy Motzek:the door. And now they're looking at you, and you're the
Candy Motzek:guide. And so the place that you start is the basics. You use the
Candy Motzek:basics that you already know. And the first thing that you
Candy Motzek:said was mindset, and very specifically how they speak to
Candy Motzek:themselves, and how they believe how they can cultivate that
Candy Motzek:belief that they are worth it, and that they can do it. Right.
Candy Motzek:So you're already now you're already on that on ramp, you're
Candy Motzek:already on that bridge. What do you what's here? Now, what's the
Candy Motzek:next thing you've given them the basics, you want them to drive,
Candy Motzek:you got your seatbelt on, which is a darn good thing I must add,
Candy Motzek:what's the trip like?
Anna Maydonova:Probably using my knowledge and my experience,
Anna Maydonova:I will help them to get over the fear of driving, if this is the
Anna Maydonova:first time and make this journey being more fun and more
Anna Maydonova:exciting. Because it doesn't need to be very scary, or very
Anna Maydonova:hard or difficult. Not. It's like probably me holding their
Anna Maydonova:hand. You know, while they're driving or helping to steer
Anna Maydonova:their wheel in the wrong in the right direction. It's probably
Anna Maydonova:showing them the next step what I've taken to get them to the
Anna Maydonova:point. I'm just probably rambling something
Candy Motzek:you're good. This is part of this is part of the
Candy Motzek:creative process. This is like we know that it's a creative
Candy Motzek:process. And that any way that you create this method for them
Candy Motzek:to get from one side to the other, every way that you create
Candy Motzek:is going to work. But what's the way that you want to create?
Candy Motzek:What do you decide is right? So you have this starting point,
Candy Motzek:you know where they are, you've helped them really see that they
Candy Motzek:know where they're going. Now they've got the basics, they're
Candy Motzek:still driving, at any point. Just think about a car, right?
Candy Motzek:At any point, you could just stop in the middle of traffic
Candy Motzek:and get out and go I'm out of here, right? So what you're
Candy Motzek:doing is making it fun and easier than they might have
Candy Motzek:thought and maybe not as scary as they thought. So they stay in
Candy Motzek:the car they stay driving, what kind of music would you have?
Candy Motzek:Playing
Anna Maydonova:of very, very motivational. We are the
Anna Maydonova:champions. We are the champions or something, something like
Anna Maydonova:that. Yeah, and the sun something encouraging to make
Anna Maydonova:the next step, the next baby step or take a massive action,
Anna Maydonova:maybe accelerate the speed A little bit.
Candy Motzek:And I noticed that you've got this thing where you
Candy Motzek:want them to experience it fast, right? Yes. And that is
Candy Motzek:possible. And it may be part of your process, it may also be
Candy Motzek:part of your offering. Like that might be one of the things that
Candy Motzek:draws them to you. How do you? How do you serve them on their
Candy Motzek:time, not your time. So what I mean by that is, sometimes we
Candy Motzek:coach people, and we know they could do this. And we know it
Candy Motzek:could be fast. But you know what? They took their foot off
Candy Motzek:the gas, and it's slow. And there you are, with your
Candy Motzek:motivational Queen music playing, and you're tapping your
Candy Motzek:foot, like, come on, it's just supposed to be fun. And you're,
Candy Motzek:you know, like, let's go, let's go, let's go. That's your speed?
Candy Motzek:How do you allow them to feel comfortable at their speed?
Candy Motzek:That's a big deal.
Anna Maydonova:You know, what, you just made me think actually,
Anna Maydonova:it's not about healing fast. It's not about going to the, to
Anna Maydonova:the point be very fast. It's about shortening my shortening
Anna Maydonova:the time they can get. And it depends, it depends on my
Anna Maydonova:client. I'm what I'm trying to say. It took me 20 years, 20
Anna Maydonova:years to get to this point. So what I was, what I'm trying to
Anna Maydonova:do for my clients, is to provide them with all the knowledge with
Anna Maydonova:all this support, so they can speed up the process for
Anna Maydonova:themselves, and make it more effortlessly, and more fun, and
Anna Maydonova:more exciting. And answering your question, if they just take
Anna Maydonova:your take their foot of the guess? That's a really good
Anna Maydonova:question. I think I will be, I will be just here holding their
Anna Maydonova:hand and asking them questions. What happening in your mind?
Anna Maydonova:What's on your way? How can I help you? How can I provide the
Anna Maydonova:support to help you to make the next step.
Candy Motzek:So another here, component of holding the space
Candy Motzek:for them, honoring them, respecting, respecting that this
Candy Motzek:is their path. And I and I also really like this, what you're
Candy Motzek:saying about, it's not about speed so much. It's about
Candy Motzek:optimization, you know, hence World's Best Life optimization
Candy Motzek:coach, right? So it's about, you can reduce the number of places
Candy Motzek:that they have to hop around finding a solution, you can
Candy Motzek:provide that safe space for them. So they so they can go the
Candy Motzek:speed they want, with the least amount of friction, grease the
Candy Motzek:wheels, as it were right. And you know, and as you were
Candy Motzek:talking, I had this idea that for some of your clients, like
Candy Motzek:when we talked about the bridge at the beginning, and we're just
Candy Motzek:about done with the coaching, but I want to leave you with
Candy Motzek:this mental picture. We talked about the bridge about the on
Candy Motzek:ramp and they got in the car and all of that, and then where
Candy Motzek:they're going so strongly to have that where they're heading
Candy Motzek:to be that howling force. And then I had this idea that it was
Candy Motzek:kind of like those bridges that you see. I think it's in
Candy Motzek:Scandinavia, where they get on one bridge and you go from one
Candy Motzek:island to the next island, then you drive over that island and
Candy Motzek:then you like it, sort of it hops all the way along as some
Candy Motzek:of the spans are very long. And some of them are very short, but
Candy Motzek:every island is different. Hmm. And they could spend quite a bit
Candy Motzek:of time enjoying that island before they make it to the next
Candy Motzek:one. So that's there's just something I don't know what it
Candy Motzek:is, but there's something there about that visual of the view
Candy Motzek:can be wonderful. From every whether you're on the bridge,
Candy Motzek:whether you're in the great car with leather and you know love
Candy Motzek:that lovely scent, whether you're, you know, on in the fast
Candy Motzek:lane or in a slower lane or whether you've made it to the
Candy Motzek:first island and you still have longer to go. So that would be
Candy Motzek:my closing question how can you how to help them appreciate the
Candy Motzek:view wherever they are
Anna Maydonova:It's probably I love your analogy by the way.
Anna Maydonova:It's just before I answer your question, it reminds me that not
Anna Maydonova:many people can jump from one or like one room to another
Anna Maydonova:straightaway. It's for some people, it can be an
Anna Maydonova:overwhelming journey. So to break this way, on a few
Anna Maydonova:different ways, like a baby steps. It's a really, really
Anna Maydonova:brilliant an amazing point. Thank you candy. And still
Anna Maydonova:reminding people, what is their why and what is awaiting for
Anna Maydonova:them. But how to make them enjoy each island is to teach them how
Anna Maydonova:to be present. Right here, right now. Because what's happening
Anna Maydonova:right now in this moment, that's a life. That's a magic. It's a
Anna Maydonova:it's a gift. That's why it's called present. Right now. Look
Anna Maydonova:at look at it. Look around yourself. You have you see
Anna Maydonova:beautiful trees, beautiful sky, or maybe you can see the beach
Anna Maydonova:and the ocean. Maybe you can see the beautiful buildings,
Anna Maydonova:whatever you enjoy, just stop. And enjoy. That's where the
Anna Maydonova:magic happening. That's, that's why the present a gift of our
Anna Maydonova:life.
Candy Motzek:Okay, so to wrap it up. We talked about a lot of
Candy Motzek:things. What's flow, one action that you will take as a result
Candy Motzek:of this conversation? What will you do because of this
Candy Motzek:conversation?
Anna Maydonova:I am getting clear about my strategy and
Anna Maydonova:about my plan. The action, what I want to take is to just start
Anna Maydonova:thinking about what steps I took to get me in this place. What
Anna Maydonova:are the the most challenging moments so I can be prepared for
Anna Maydonova:my clients? And what were the most easy and effortless and fun
Anna Maydonova:moments that I went through? And what what was my why? So just to
Anna Maydonova:stick to this? Yeah, it's it's about building my strategy, will
Anna Maydonova:you? How will
Candy Motzek:your you're gonna think about that. But how are
Candy Motzek:you accurate? So I'm like right now what we're bringing it down
Candy Motzek:to is okay, we're going to actually do something that makes
Candy Motzek:use of what the new insight that you have, what will you do? Is
Candy Motzek:it like, will you record yourself? Will you do videos of
Candy Motzek:yourself? Will you write notes? Will you create some kind of a
Candy Motzek:diagram would you paint? What would you do?
Anna Maydonova:I'm gonna write my notes. And I'm gonna make I'm
Anna Maydonova:gonna make a board where we're probably going to paint those
Anna Maydonova:bridges with islands. And also, I'm going to use it in my wreck
Anna Maydonova:my podcasts.
Candy Motzek:Thank you. Thanks again for listening today.
Candy Motzek:Please hop on over to Apple podcasts and leave a review.
Candy Motzek:Also, I would love to hear from you did something that I say
Candy Motzek:resonate? What else would you like to learn about? Click the
Candy Motzek:link in the player and leave a comment on the post. This is
Candy Motzek:going to give me great ideas for future episodes so I can help
Candy Motzek:you best. Join me again next week. For more coaching, support
Candy Motzek:and teaching to help you become the confident coach. You are
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