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Acknowledgment, Celebration (or not), and Reality. Where are you at?
This year has been a big one in so many ways: Big Emotions. Big Developments. Big Changes. Big Adjustments (or not). Just… well. Big.
Listen in as Jen + Jane debate on what (if anything) to celebrate, how to acknowledge what this year has been, and some tools and tips to support you over the Holiday season.
One of those tools is The Empowerment Playbook. If you haven’t already downloaded it, we encourage you to do that and set aside 20 minutes where you can move through some of the feelings you’re experiencing. It will support you with observing, noticing, and accepting where you’re at. It will help you articulate more clearly what you might be needing. Above all, we hope it will help bring you an opportunity for calm as we move through this.
Additional Resources/Reading:
Disclaimer:
On the No Halos Here Podcast, we explore a wide range of topics broadly categorized as well-being. We encourage you to do your own research and make informed choices about your health and wellbeing. The information we provide is never a substitute for qualified advice specific to your individual needs. In listening, you take full responsibility for implementing any suggestions shared on the podcast and you agree to indemnify us completely against all consequences arising directly or indirectly from your choices.
About Jen and Jane
Jen Lang
Jen believes in the power and wisdom of women’s voices. She’s a guide for women who want to tune into and align their inner voice so their outer voice can shine; uniting physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual energies into a powerful voice ready to share your message.
Jane Stark
Passionate about energetic alignment and living life from a place of personal power, Jane is a heart-centered leader, certified health and life coach, and marketing strategist. She leads others to play bigger and feel lighter by helping them see and navigate their blocks and connect more deeply with themselves.
Continue the conversation:
Instagram: www.instagram.com/wearejenandjane
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/WeareJenandJane
Community: Get the Empowerment Playbook (and access our Community Calls) here: https://www.wearejenandjane.com/playbook
Thanks for listening!
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This is no halos here hosted by Jen Lang and Jane
Jen Lang:Stark, the place to inspire a change in your consciousness to
Jen Lang:elevate the world. We're to heart centered business owners
Jen Lang:nourishing our inner rebels while growing our respective
Jen Lang:businesses.
Jane Stark:No halos here is the result of bringing together an
Jane Stark:opera singer turn spiritual mentor and a marketing
Jane Stark:professional turned well being coached to meditate daily.
Jane Stark:Together, we unite physical, mental, emotional and spiritual
Jane Stark:energies into a powerful presence to lead, heal and
Jane Stark:inspire. We love exploring the shadowed edges of life, the
Jane Stark:universe and beyond through honest and thought provoking
Jane Stark:conversations. Let's dive in.
Jen Lang:Hi, and welcome back to another episode of no halos
Jen Lang:here with Jen Lang and Jane Stark. We are excited to have
Jen Lang:you here with us for our holiday wrap episode. And we had to set
Jen Lang:a different direction about way we each had our own ideas about
Jen Lang:the way this episode might roll out. And so I'm going to hand
Jen Lang:this over to Jane to sort of get us started on it. And then we're
Jen Lang:going to provide some wonderful guidance and content for you for
Jen Lang:the end of the year.
Jane Stark:Okay. Yeah, we were just reflecting on our years, I
Jane Stark:think, you know, and what, what we've been through, and not just
Jane Stark:us, but reflecting on how big of a year 2021 seems to have been
Jane Stark:for everyone. I'm gonna enjoy everyone. Everything. Yeah. You
Jane Stark:know, and it's been a common theme. I think Jen and I both
Jane Stark:noticed in talking to people in our own circles in our personal
Jane Stark:lives, just how much stuff shit has been happening in people's
Jane Stark:lives. It's not I mean, yes, we all know that we're living
Jane Stark:through a pandemic, but it's not just that it's like, it just
Jane Stark:seems to be you know, there's loss of loved ones, there's
Jane Stark:divorce, there's, you know, mental health, there's, like,
Jane Stark:there's just so many layers and levels happening. And, you know,
Jane Stark:in I think in, in the self help world, in our, in our world, you
Jane Stark:know, we, we don't want to get down a rabbit hole of just
Jane Stark:looking at the negative and going, Oh, my God, it's been so
Jane Stark:horrible. And so Jen was like, you know, what, like, we also
Jane Stark:want to look for the things that to celebrate, and maybe we
Jane Stark:should start out with a celebration. And I had a really
Jane Stark:strong reaction. I was like, I do not feel the celebration
Jane Stark:energy right now at all. Like, yes, we're headed into the
Jane Stark:holidays, and I don't get me wrong. I'm not like, I'm not in
Jane Stark:a scrooge mentality. But I'm like, celebrate just didn't land
Jane Stark:for me. And so we wanted to bring that here to the show and
Jane Stark:talk about that, and how, you know, there are different things
Jane Stark:that work for each of us. And so, what we kind of what we came
Jane Stark:to was acknowledgment. And what if we could just acknowledge
Jane Stark:everything that we all have been through individually and
Jane Stark:collectively over the last year. And that landed a lot better for
Jane Stark:me. I'm like, Yeah, I can, I can do that. That feels neutral.
Jane Stark:Celebration felt a bit
Jen Lang:worst, I would say Forrest Yeah, me. But maybe.
Jane Stark:So can you give us a little bit of a backer like what
Jane Stark:did celebration bring up for you and feel like and it's always
Jane Stark:more aligned for you. It's
Jen Lang:it's definitely more aligned for me. And and I'm not
Jen Lang:saying because we we did talk about the word celebration, and
Jen Lang:especially in self help communities, celebration can be
Jen Lang:a way of Yes, acknowledging the good and moving into a higher
Jen Lang:vibe, higher vibration. And it can also be a way of bypassing
Jen Lang:the actual problems underneath. Right.
Jane Stark:And that's what I said. Right? So bypassing, like,
Jane Stark:I feel like we're bypassing all of the shit that went on this
Jane Stark:year.
Jen Lang:Yeah. So from my perspective, and with a lot of
Jen Lang:the coaches that I've worked with, I always feel it's
Jen Lang:actually helpful to start with celebration as a way to
Jen Lang:acknowledge all the awesome stuff that has happened. Yeah.
Jen Lang:And so for example, like, there's no reason why we
Jen Lang:couldn't celebrate the fact that we launched our podcast this
Jen Lang:year, which is an awesome way to celebrate.
Jane Stark:Yeah, don't get me wrong. I'm not saying I don't
Jane Stark:want to acknowledge any of the positives. I totally agree with
Jane Stark:it. Yeah, important to
Jen Lang:us. But the celebration space is can feel
Jen Lang:forced. So it kind of serves a dual purpose where there's this.
Jen Lang:If we don't move into that space of celebration of consciously
Jen Lang:celebrating the accomplishments and constantly celebrating, you
Jen Lang:know, what we have all lived through and experienced this
Jen Lang:year, then we run the risk of being dragged down into the
Jen Lang:space of this year is so hard. Everything about this year was
Jen Lang:so hard. And we fall into that judgment space.
Jen Lang:I'm like, oh, yeah, clearly I, I'm a singer, I express myself
Jen Lang:through tones and tonality. Kurt calls me out on that sometimes,
Jen Lang:too, it's pretty funny. So, if we are always caught in how hard
Jen Lang:something is, then it's hard. It's harder and harder to see
Jen Lang:where the good isn't where the shining light is. And it's like,
Jen Lang:I think it's Leonard Cohen, piece of piece of poetry, where
Jen Lang:the cracks are where the light comes in. And
Jane Stark:I think it's a Go ahead. Did you talk about is
Jane Stark:there? Okay. You say? I think it's, it's a real balance. For
Jane Stark:me, it feels like, between, because I 100% agree. And, you
Jane Stark:know, I mean, I start most of my coaching sessions off with Ken
Jane Stark:want you to tell me what went well, because I know what's
Jane Stark:gonna I know that we're gonna get into the what's not going?
Jane Stark:Well, that's why we're, you know, part of the reasons, we're
Jane Stark:often talking, but so what went well, for the exact reasons that
Jane Stark:you just shared, right that you have to, it's very easy for our
Jane Stark:brains to just want to focus on the negative. Yeah, and we like
Jane Stark:to bypass the positives. However, I guess, where I was
Jane Stark:coming from, and what I was feeling when we first had this
Jane Stark:discussion is around, also just acknowledging what was and like,
Jane Stark:not trying to sugarcoat it, like 2021 was a really hard year, I
Jane Stark:think, for a lot of people. And we were reflecting, reflecting
Jane Stark:earlier, Jen and I, in another conversation with a friend that,
Jane Stark:you know, 2020 was rough. And we all kind of were like, I mean, I
Jane Stark:feel like a little bit like we were all just in shock with
Jane Stark:2020. Right, like what just happened. But I know, you know,
Jane Stark:you and I both shared last year at the beginning of this year
Jane Stark:that like 2020 was actually a really great year for me
Jane Stark:personally. Yeah. I felt like 2020 was a really good year.
Jane Stark:2021 has been different. Yeah. Not that it hasn't had its its
Jane Stark:highlights, and it's good things but 2021. And I've talked to a
Jane Stark:few people that are just like a, how did we get to December of
Jane Stark:2021? Like what just happened? Clip? Yeah, I was I was at the
Jane Stark:hair salon yesterday, actually, we were talking and one of the
Jane Stark:girls was like, she's like, somebody pointed out to me the
Jane Stark:other day that we've basically been in this pandemic for two
Jane Stark:years. And it's like, and we were like, Whoa, yeah, that's
Jane Stark:crazy. Right? We still think back to like, oh, yeah, when the
Jane Stark:pandemic started, and it doesn't, I don't know, I don't
Jane Stark:feel like it feels like almost two years ago. No. But so 2021
Jane Stark:has just, it's had a different energy. It's how to, there has
Jane Stark:been sort of a heaviness to it, and a, you know, just, you know,
Jane Stark:like, yes, continuing to navigate a pandemic, and and
Jane Stark:just the highs and the lows that have come with that. You know,
Jane Stark:we're, we're getting out of it. Oh, we're not getting out of it.
Jane Stark:Oh, we're getting out of it. Oh, here's another variant. Like,
Jane Stark:it's that constant
Jen Lang:cycling through highs and lows. I think. Well, there
Jen Lang:was that New York Times article, I think it about the there was
Jen Lang:two, there were two books. We'll find them and we'll put them in
Jen Lang:the show notes. But one thing of languishing, yes. That was the
Jen Lang:other one, I think was it Brene. Brown. She was Adam Grant.
Jane Stark:And you get it, we'll get it link it up with the
Jane Stark:correct will get the correct author. Yeah, they don't. But
Jane Stark:yeah, languishing was the term. And so yeah, if we feel
Jen Lang:like we've been languishing through 2021 hit for
Jen Lang:you feel that way, you're definitely not alone. And this
Jen Lang:constant cycling through, up and down and up and down. You know,
Jen Lang:or through different regulations. Depending on where
Jen Lang:you are in the world, you can travel, you can't travel, oh,
Jen Lang:you've traveled, oh, it's gonna be more complicated to get back
Jen Lang:to your home country. Or if you leave, you can't come back to
Jen Lang:your home countries, a lot of my friends in Australia and New
Jen Lang:Zealand are experiencing. So there's a lot of nuance in this.
Jen Lang:Recognizing and acknowledging 2021 where you might not want
Jen Lang:to, you might want to just be like, fuck, and burn it all
Jen Lang:down. I'm just gonna leave it in the past and move forward, which
Jen Lang:is one way of approaching it and not saying it's right or wrong.
Jen Lang:It is one way of approaching with it. So
Jane Stark:I think that's the piece though. That's where Yeah,
Jane Stark:I just I feel like a little bit like, let's call it out for what
Jane Stark:it was like, and for the last two years, for that matter,
Jane Stark:right? These have been probably some like these are, these are
Jane Stark:times that are going to be in the history books like we are
Jane Stark:living through, you know, our version of World Wars, really on
Jane Stark:a totally different level. Exactly. Yeah, not the same, but
Jane Stark:like, a new version of it. And I think there is something to be
Jane Stark:said for needing to recognize that and recognize what we're
Jane Stark:in. And in that, we can find a little bit of compassion or a
Jane Stark:little bit of grace for ourselves. And I know for me
Jane Stark:personally, and again, in conversations I've had with
Jane Stark:others, it's like, the macro is reflecting in the micro, or vice
Jane Stark:versa. But like, you know, it's definitely I'm seeing that where
Jane Stark:what we just talked about, that's happening kind of
Jane Stark:globally and for the collective, we're also seeing happen
Jane Stark:individually. Yes, in our own in our own lives. And so we've
Jen Lang:seen a lot unfolding. Yeah, and it's a lot, it's we're
Jen Lang:seeing it unfolding in personal relationships and marriages,
Jen Lang:relationships with, with loved ones, you know, and that's what
Jen Lang:we want to bring your attention to, with this episode,
Jen Lang:especially with this holiday wrap piece is moving into the
Jen Lang:state of observation and reflection, without reliving
Jen Lang:some of the extreme emotions that you may have experienced in
Jen Lang:the past year. So what can you observe? And it is that aspect
Jen Lang:of hindsight brings clarity. And I was actually thinking when you
Jen Lang:were talking just now, Jane, about 10 years from now, when we
Jen Lang:look back on this time, what will what will be the narrative
Jen Lang:and what will be the dialogue that is put out into the world?
Jen Lang:Because there will be the lived experiences of it. You know,
Jen Lang:there will be, you know, kids who were born during the
Jen Lang:pandemic, will they be identified as like the pandemic
Jen Lang:generated babies or COVID? Babies, you know, and so when we
Jen Lang:have this, if you can bring yourself forward, five or 10
Jen Lang:years, and after this transition time has passed, what do you
Jen Lang:want it to be like, and we'll probably touch on that. And then
Jen Lang:in the new year, as well. But looking back, and reflecting on
Jen Lang:this time, will give you fuel? And I'm hoping inspiration as to
Jen Lang:how you want to move forward. Yep. And that might just be the
Jen Lang:next three weeks. Yeah,
Jane Stark:I mean, I think that was the intention of this
Jane Stark:episode, right? We have to look and go, Okay, this is going to
Jane Stark:come out on December 14, as we head into prime holiday time.
Jane Stark:And, and the whole conversation around celebrating or
Jane Stark:acknowledging or whichever term lands for you was really about
Jane Stark:reflecting but not in that January reflection energy, but
Jane Stark:in this, okay, it's been a big year. How do I want to move
Jane Stark:through this big season? Because this is kind of the big finale
Jane Stark:of our year, every year. Right? And, and it's often so frantic,
Jane Stark:I saw a really funny meme yesterday. And it was of it was
Jane Stark:a picture of an animal. I don't remember what it was, it wasn't
Jane Stark:a bear. But it was an animal that hibernates and it was
Jane Stark:talking about how animals in the winter sleep, and rest and
Jane Stark:whatnot. And then the other picture was like this picture of
Jane Stark:like, Christmas chaos and like, you know, and they're like
Jane Stark:humans, on the other hand in the winter, start shopping, and
Jane Stark:visiting and baking, and did it and hosting and doing all the
Jane Stark:things and I was like, wow, it's and they're like, Yeah, we kind
Jane Stark:of got this wrong. Like, it just it was really accurate. Like,
Jane Stark:yeah, it's so fascinating. Hey, like, we're headed into the
Jane Stark:solstice on the 21st in North America, that means we're headed
Jane Stark:into like, you know, the dark hibernation hibernation time and
Jane Stark:what do we do we push ourselves like no other to be out there.
Jane Stark:And so I guess really what we want to offer up is that moment
Jane Stark:for you guys to pause and go How do I want to move through these
Jane Stark:next couple of weeks and through this season? Knowing too that
Jane Stark:that can really set us up for the next year? Yeah, and I don't
Jane Stark:know I'm not really feeling the hole at this point. All of the
Jane Stark:set your you know, what do you want January to be and look
Jane Stark:forward to like you know what's 22 to kind of bring what are you
Jane Stark:leaving behind
Jen Lang:that internationals frantic right now it does a you
Jen Lang:can do planning any time this is the this is the other face. You
Jen Lang:don't have to do the planning now. You can you can sit with
Jen Lang:where you're at probably is the most valuable piece of guidance
Jen Lang:we can offer on today's episode. Even if you're just listening,
Jen Lang:whatever it is you're doing, whatever it is you're feeling,
Jen Lang:whoever you're with, sit with where you were at today, right
Jen Lang:now, and give it the acknowledgement and recognition
Jen Lang:that you deserve.
Jane Stark:Yeah, except what is in front of you right now. And
Jane Stark:what do you need and tune in? Like what do you need? I think a
Jane Stark:big piece of this and again, a big theme of the last couple of
Jane Stark:years that has been shown to us is around, like regulating our
Jane Stark:nervous system, right and figuring that out, which is, you
Jane Stark:know, self care was heard of the term that's always thrown
Jane Stark:around. But really, at the root of self care, the reason that we
Jane Stark:do it is to keep ourselves regulated and to keep our and to
Jane Stark:help our nervous systems stay in that healthy state. So
Jen Lang:we're at least come down from redlining. So this is
Jen Lang:this is the other part of this whole cycling process over 2021
Jen Lang:is if you have been in a near constant state of accelerated
Jen Lang:energy or Accelerated stress, then there are certain
Jen Lang:physiological responses that your body will have. And we
Jen Lang:talked about that on last week's episode with Laura Craddock. So
Jen Lang:if you haven't, do go back and listen to that one, for sure. So
Jen Lang:when you're in this state, and you're needing to restore your
Jen Lang:nervous system to a bit more of a natural level, it's not a
Jen Lang:question of I'm going to throw 10 tools at it and hope for the
Jen Lang:best. It's my quiz. You know, this is also this is also the
Jen Lang:season of extremes. And this season of excess. So whether
Jen Lang:you're in the summer or winter, southern hemisphere, or northern
Jen Lang:hemisphere, so it might just be what, again, what I said, What
Jen Lang:do you need right now? What's one easy, simple thing you can
Jen Lang:do right now to just back?
Jane Stark:I've, I've actually really been trying to be
Jane Stark:conscious of doing some of the deep breathing. And it sounds so
Jane Stark:simple, but I mean, and I, you know, I told it, and I don't do
Jane Stark:it all the time, like, and but I've found myself lately, just
Jane Stark:being like literally, okay, just like stop and take three
Jane Stark:conscious breaths. Yeah. And it can be as small as that. And it
Jane Stark:actually does, it really does help. Or this morning, you know,
Jane Stark:I was sharing with Jen. Before we got on that I just, I woke up
Jane Stark:feeling kind of anxious, I woke up with some tightness in my
Jane Stark:chest. And I just, rather than just pushing through my day, and
Jane Stark:going oh, like trying to ignore it, and and busy myself, which I
Jane Stark:can very easily do, I really made the conscious effort to
Jane Stark:just sit with it and be like, What is this? Is this even mine.
Jane Stark:And, you know, going through a little bit of my practices and
Jane Stark:tools to just let that go and move it. And in all honesty, I
Jane Stark:did that this morning. And it didn't, it shifted it a little
Jane Stark:bit, but it still was there about an hour later. And then I
Jane Stark:had to check in again. And I was like, I wonder if I need to like
Jane Stark:hop on the bike and just X like sweat this out. And, you know,
Jane Stark:so looking for those different ways. But the first piece is
Jane Stark:actually being able to witness and see and acknowledge that
Jane Stark:hey, actually I've got I can feel that tightness in my chest,
Jane Stark:or I can feel that emotion sitting there right under the
Jane Stark:surface. I think that's that's the other piece is just like you
Jane Stark:say, allowing what's here? Yeah, so if there's an emotion right
Jane Stark:there, and you can, you know, allow yourself five minutes to
Jane Stark:go and have a little cry. Could you give that to yourself this
Jane Stark:year?
Jen Lang:Yeah, but gift that literally gift that to yourself.
Jen Lang:On the other extreme, you might be feeling angry and frustrated.
Jen Lang:So what would it take for you to a acknowledge that anger and
Jen Lang:frustration to yourself without taking it out on loved ones? Or
Jen Lang:be finding an outlet for that anger and frustration, that
Jen Lang:doesn't hurt anybody. And so when you bottle up that anger
Jen Lang:and frustration inside, all you're doing is you're turning
Jen Lang:that inward to yourself and your physiological body is going to
Jen Lang:show those effects. But if you are finding an outlet for you
Jen Lang:know, get exercise, move your body, like join some martial
Jen Lang:arts or something
Jane Stark:that cannot our empowerment playbook. Yes, well,
Jane Stark:actually, yes,
Jen Lang:let's actually do that. So the empowerment
Jen Lang:playbook is that tool that we've designed that's available for
Jen Lang:anybody and everybody to use. It's full of creative ideas to
Jen Lang:move through those emotions. It's a guided process. We meet
Jen Lang:once a month in a community to talk about aspects of the
Jen Lang:process. And actually, in the new year, we're gonna have some
Jen Lang:pop up calls to work through the playbook together, which is
Jen Lang:really excited.
Jane Stark:But the end the way we designed it, is sort of to
Jane Stark:that hybrid of what you were just sharing, right? Where it's
Jane Stark:like, there's a guided process to get you to reflect, to
Jane Stark:identify the emotions. And then there's a step where it's like,
Jane Stark:actually now get into the embodiment piece and how do you
Jane Stark:need to move that emotion? Is it through art? Is it through
Jane Stark:music? Is it through movement? Is it through tears, but just,
Jane Stark:you know, so if you need some support with that it might be a
Jane Stark:place to look. Yeah, and help through that. I wanted to touch
Jane Stark:Jen on We talked briefly about how we follow you know, some of
Jane Stark:the As the astrologers and various different people in our
Jane Stark:circles that are all talking about the energy that's out
Jane Stark:there right now, a lot about what we're feeling, I have to
Jane Stark:say, as I've started to follow some of this stuff more closely
Jane Stark:in the last two years, it never fails to amaze me how accurate
Jane Stark:Stroud of it has been. And it's really more, it's not accurate.
Jane Stark:This is not about predicting events, yes, about predicting,
Jane Stark:or looking at themes of what things might feel like. And that
Jane Stark:part has been really interesting for me to be like, huh, I never
Jane Stark:would have seen this coming. But this is exactly what they said
Jane Stark:in terms of how this felt. So I was thinking, you know, where
Jane Stark:we're at right now. And looking forward, a little bit into 2022.
Jane Stark:What's the energy you're picking up on? What are you?
Jen Lang:Oh, you know, I described it to someone this
Jen Lang:week as sort of where we're currently at as we're being
Jen Lang:squeezed smaller and smaller through a smaller and smaller
Jen Lang:space. And it is, it feels like it's is an aspect of rebirthing
Jen Lang:if you want to go down those terms, but they like we're
Jen Lang:feeling the squeeze and the energy of where we're going, I
Jen Lang:feel is not the pressure is not going to be letting up in the
Jen Lang:next. Yeah. period of time. I'm just I'm not going to say weeks
Jen Lang:or months or years. There is no timeline in that respect. It's
Jen Lang:going to get crunchier. And so part of the reason we've created
Jen Lang:those tools, like the empowerment playbook is to help
Jen Lang:you through these crunchy times help you through those Squeezy
Jen Lang:spots, and to provide that guidance and support. So where I
Jen Lang:see it going, is still crunchier and still squeeze here. And at
Jen Lang:the same time, I know he's totally technical words easier,
Jen Lang:it's easier, squeeze, get your squeeze on. And at the same
Jen Lang:time, it's unnecessary process. So is there there is, from a
Jen Lang:listeners perspective, if you don't have a lot of these tools
Jen Lang:at your fingertips, then start building your toolbox and start
Jen Lang:building the skills and ways that you can go further inward.
Jen Lang:It's it's not the the external journey is causing the inward
Jen Lang:squeezing. So the inward squeezing is where you can begin
Jen Lang:to resolve and let off the pressure. That's your tool.
Jane Stark:Okay. Expand on that.
Jen Lang:Expand on that. All right, go deeper. Thank you.
Jen Lang:James gave me this look like? You mean, what are you talking
Jen Lang:about? This is a big metaphor,
Jane Stark:that's really deep. We need to unpack this. Okay. So
Jen Lang:all of the events we're experiencing in our day to
Jen Lang:day lives, whether it's in our relationships, whether it's on a
Jen Lang:global platform, whether it's like, virus, something, I don't
Jen Lang:know, variant number 7463. And you're having booster number
Jen Lang:10,000. I don't know, I don't know. But the all those external
Jen Lang:pressures on us, that caused us to have those internal
Jen Lang:responses, like the internal emotions, or the anger and the
Jen Lang:frustration, and the whatever it is, you're feeling, it's valid.
Jen Lang:And at the same time, it's by going deeper into those feelings
Jen Lang:for yourself and resolving them for yourself. That will take the
Jen Lang:pressure off. So when we do the inner work, the pressure
Jen Lang:reduces. But if you're constantly looking for external
Jen Lang:solutions, to internal problems, to internal problems, that are
Jen Lang:external problems, but they're manifesting as internal
Jen Lang:problems, if you're constantly looking. So for example, if
Jen Lang:you're numbing with overwork, or if you're numbing with alcohol
Jen Lang:or substances, then yes, it's going to take away the pain and
Jen Lang:the discomfort that you're feeling. But it's actually not
Jen Lang:taking the pressure off. So then, the question you need to
Jen Lang:ask is, why do I have this behavior? Why is this B and you
Jen Lang:might not even recognize it as a behavior because it's such an
Jen Lang:ingrained habit. Yeah. So again, that's process of observing.
Jen Lang:This is a prime opportunity to observe
Jane Stark:and observing so one of the things that I have
Jane Stark:started to do and found helpful with the observing is in
Jane Stark:journaling, or writing things out and noticing and allowing.
Jane Stark:So one of the things is you can almost write it as the third
Jane Stark:person. So that's one one way that sometimes we can trick our
Jane Stark:brain is start to write out whatever the situation is. or
Jane Stark:whatever the feelings and the emotions are, and write it as if
Jane Stark:you're the third person like reading a book.
Jen Lang:Even give yourself a different name if you want.
Jen Lang:Yeah, give your try reading with your middle name.
Jane Stark:Mm hmm. Or, alternatively, I have been able
Jane Stark:to, instead of writing the third person, but I can I literally
Jane Stark:have to step up almost step outside of myself, and look in
Jane Stark:and be like, What is she feeling? Or what and I can do it
Jane Stark:still, it's like, what am I feeling, but it is that
Jane Stark:separation and being able to witness and sometimes just
Jane Stark:writing it out and seeing it written on paper without being
Jane Stark:completely in the emotion is the piece that's really important
Jane Stark:when we can start to pull that away a little bit, then we can
Jane Stark:start to, to observe in what you were what Jen was sharing there.
Jane Stark:And that's, yeah, that's the enormous degree inside work.
Jen Lang:It is the inside work. And it's the other aspect of
Jen Lang:this is as it's I think it's even more important over the
Jen Lang:holiday season to double down on this work. So to carve out the
Jen Lang:time, and yes, we have lots on the go. And yes, you know,
Jen Lang:there's still seven Christmas gifts to pick up and or three
Jen Lang:parties to attend or whatever it is, that's playing out for you.
Jen Lang:Even if it means you getting up 30 minutes earlier each morning,
Jen Lang:carve out the time is invaluable, and you will never
Jen Lang:get that time back. So this, it is making your emotions a
Jen Lang:priority to yourself.
Jane Stark:Yep, it's funny. Gentlemen, we hopped on our call
Jane Stark:this morning. You said so I think many of you know if you
Jane Stark:don't know, this whole podcast was born out of 70 meditations
Jane Stark:that Jen and I started doing back in 2020. And we continued
Jane Stark:having those little they kind of evolved into life conversations
Jane Stark:meditation slash mini meetings, at 7am. And we, in the last
Jane Stark:couple months have stopped meetings so frequently and doing
Jane Stark:those. And you just said to me this morning, like, we need to
Jane Stark:get those back. Because we actually notice how much you
Jane Stark:know, it's a way for us, I think, to have that
Jane Stark:accountability piece. So that we're doing that. We're sharing,
Jane Stark:we're connecting. We're doing the meditations, we're carving
Jane Stark:out that time for ourselves. So I know it's hard. What I'm
Jane Stark:saying is we're in it to like we we do it to we've dropped it.
Jane Stark:And we're both noticing how impactful those 30 minutes 7am
Jane Stark:meetings are for us.
Jen Lang:I'm having a real time idea right now. Yeah. This might
Jen Lang:be I'm not saying this is going to happen. However, I'm thinking
Jen Lang:that it would be really cool to have a listener meditation,
Jen Lang:maybe twice a week, two mornings a week at 7am. Pacific. And it's
Jen Lang:a space where you can carve out that time. So like we create
Jen Lang:that time we create that time for people to show up. Cool, and
Jen Lang:just like 20 minutes. Yep. So it's a public open to you. 20
Jen Lang:minutes. Meditation spot. There's no preamble. You don't
Jen Lang:have to put cameras on. No cameras, seven, eight cameras.
Jen Lang:Definitely not Jameis.
Jane Stark:And I've always had that rule. No cameras, no
Jane Stark:cameras. Even when we did zoom. We it was always cameras off.
Jane Stark:Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Well, anyway, good idea. We'll play with that.
Jane Stark:Come back.
Jen Lang:We'll come back. We roll on back to that because it
Jen Lang:might not be zoom. It might be another platform. So we'll stay
Jen Lang:tuned on that. I'm just having this real time idea. Like maybe
Jen Lang:that's something we can do for our community. It's just short
Jen Lang:term. Yeah, twice. Yeah, twice a week. Moving through moving into
Jen Lang:2220 22.
Jane Stark:Yeah, I like it. Okay, so Okay, I think with
Jane Stark:that, but summarize here. So back crunchy here. denser,
Jane Stark:crunchy and wet squeezy,
Jen Lang:crunchy, and Squeezy. Crunchy and Squeezy. Time counts
Jen Lang:when you're feeling the squeeze?
Jane Stark:Yes, some more than others. Maybe you've had a
Jane Stark:really great year and that's awesome. celebrate that. Yes. I
Jane Stark:am not anti celebration. You know, celebrate that. And if
Jane Stark:not, if not acknowledge that. We see you were in it. Yeah, it's
Jane Stark:it's not easy. We don't need to sugarcoat and pretend like it's
Jane Stark:easy. It's not, you're not not been easy. And connect back in
Jane Stark:to what you need. Right now. What would what is your heart
Jane Stark:calling to you? Yeah. To do to be through the next couple of
Jane Stark:weeks through the holiday season. What can you give
Jane Stark:yourself to make it an enjoyable, soothing time?
Jen Lang:That's great advice. I think we'll roll out on that.
Jen Lang:All right. Have an amazing holiday season. We will not have
Jen Lang:any new episodes for the next two weeks. Our next episode will
Jen Lang:drop the first week of January. And we are going to be talking
Jen Lang:about Yeah, we have some really great topics mapped out. We're
Jen Lang:so excited. Thank you so much for being part of our first year
Jen Lang:of podcasting together. We are totally celebrating that
Jen Lang:celebrating that yeah, celebrating you and recognizing
Jen Lang:and acknowledging where you're at. Thank you, everybody. Have
Jen Lang:an amazing break. Take care. Thanks for joining us for these
Jen Lang:conscious combos. If you're ready to dive deeper, head on
Jen Lang:over to Dr. Jenn and jane.com to continue the conversation.
Jane Stark:If you'd love this episode, please take a moment to
Jane Stark:share with your friends or your network and leave us a review by
Jane Stark:going to Apple podcasts. Find us on Instagram at we are Jen and
Jane Stark:Jane and let us know what you enjoy and what you would like to
Jane Stark:see more of. We'd love to hear from you.
