Dec. 26, 2019

Expectation of happiness rises with a gratitude attitude

Expectation of happiness rises with a gratitude attitude

What happens when you expect rain

Flowers? Would we go buy a car and have low expectations? There are studies that say the more people expect from a product the less likely they are to be satisfied. But what happens inside our mind? Need a session

Because the neuroscience of low expectation has some holes. One the one hand, it has been said that having low expectations can sidestep unhappiness. You know, a family gathering full of expectations and when it doesn't turn out the way we thought it could be. We could feel unhappy.

I have said to many clients, expect nothing and let the day unfold. I believe this is different from having high or low expectations.

But we do have expectations don't we. We expect safety at the airport, in our schools. We don't send our kids to school expecting something bad to happen. We go out to eat and we expect the food to be fresh and the kitchen clean. We expect much in life.

Why? Because expectation is a fundamental brain process.

Deep within our subconscious brain the process of expectation functions. As we walk down a street, our mind makes choices on which street or dark alley way to walk. When to cross the street; at the crosswalk or run through a break in traffic. Expectation is actionable. Because our mind predicts a certain outcome.

Like planning a vacation and expecting it to rain. If you were going to the beach, maybe that wouldn't be your best case scenario, but if you were going to a rain forest, then it would be grand!

Raj Raghunathan PHd. once wrote about his Grandmother's happiness formula. According to his memory, happiness rose if expectation fell. But is this true?

The fact that low expectation could lead us directly into failure. Who would strive for greatness with low expectation? It is after all a negative mindset, built on a fundamental belief that low expectations make a happier life. Yet our belief would then create the behavior to fulfill our low expectations of ourselves. Of which we would have an opinion about ourselves that could again be negative.

We can probably consider for the most part that the human inside us could achieve more with a strong sense of self esteem, self worth and self love.

And that our lost expectation of ourselves and others can be greatly overcome through compassion. Accepting and forgiving when ours or others expectations are not met. Being grateful for what we do have, with the intention of striving towards improving ourselves.

Where on the other hand, maintaining low expectations simply leads us into settling for less in ourselves, in others and in life

Jeremy E. Sherman PHD reflects on these three ideals. Gratitude, compassion and striving. He postulates that by living with these three ideals in mind we naturally become better.

Better at being us. Better at dealing with our experiences and with others. 

So how do we begin. We enhance our own experience through striving to enhance ourselves. letting go; as the old saying goes; of the things we can not control. because psychology tells us that the human psyche requires a sense of control, even if that control is perceived. 

It makes a winning mindset but also is a proven mindset for recovering lost health. 

But what else? Self love. Ensuing that the most important person in your life is taken care of. That person is you. Once we take care of ourselves and put our needs first, we enter the realm of magic.

Why? because we find ourselves doing more of what we love. Striving for excellence and letting go of the things we have no control over. Be are happier, follow our dreams, eat better and exercise more. We simply are happier, and happier people are known to have lasting friendships and loving relationships. They earn more money and get offered more opportunities. 

Within their self love, they appreciate themselves and that flows into everyone around them. People are naturally drawn towards them. 

Because they are dancing in the rain. #myfreedomdomday #whatdoesfreedommeantoyou #mindyourfreedom

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Adele's bio: I live through passion and purpose. In love with neuroscience, drawn to the power of the mind; as a survivor of a plane that crashed and flipped in water. What I experienced while drowning. The stuff I now know to be true.

I consciously live my values. Being clear about what I do and don;t want. Living a life I love waking up to every day. 

I thrive on learning, growing and expanding my awareness so I can embrace all that life has to offer.

My clients are successful professionals looking for or going through change. They want to be listened to and are looking for a personalized caring approach.

If you are tired of repeating old patterns of behavior.

Feel stuck. 

Experience uncomfortable or imbalanced feelings in your body.

Wake up feeling dis-satisfied. Are living under stress or simply looking for a new beginning that fulfills your inner purpose. Then you have found your safe haven.

As a NLP trainer, I create perceptual shifts, teach and provide life skills. Plus install the neuro-networking necessary fro transformation.

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