Discover Your Why With Jannette Anderson | MDIDS2E33

Welcome, welcome. Welcome everyone. Yes, this is Paul Finck Maverick Millionaire and yes, you are listening to Mavericks Do It Different podcast. And this is where we create a difference in your world by thinking different, being different doing it different approaching life in a different way to create a different result for you, for us, for our society or community, everyone at large that's listening to this podcast, and creating that difference. We've got some amazing people here, one in particular is here with us today. And so excited to have her here she is and get this the Y whisperer, passionate about showing entrepreneurs how to tap into the three why's and the one wants, so that you can market and sell your way to success. Across the board on your terms. This really key. She's just obsessed with entrepreneurism roots and trying to survive a childhood of challenging lack and persist to this day to show women hit and men. For those of you out there we are target is showing women how to profit from their passions, business development experts, 38 years of strategic planning, sales marketing expertise. Please welcome Jeanette Anderson. Thank you so much. The Why whisperer.

How are you? I'm awesome. Paul, thank you so much for having me and for playing with me today. Here here. Here

We are. So we've got to dive right in. Why Why? Why is why is so important.

It's one of my favorite questions. So I believe whether you call it purpose or mission, or whatever the word is you may use, I tend to find those terms kind of latent. And a lot of meaning that people apply to them that may sometimes not serve them tends to feel like it's externally bestowed. Whereas your y is, I call it or my definition for it is the intersection of what we're healing from the past, and what we long for, for the future for ourselves and others. So our Y is a thread that weaves through the tapestry of our life is a consistent thing that motivates us and pulls us or pushes us at times. And it's it's really, there's a number of different ways you can look at it. It's what we're exploring for God, it's our way of being that most helps us grow. It is why we do what we do. So it's the intersection of what we're healing from our past and what we long for, for our future. And especially for people who work in a we're in a business or in a career where that is part of what they're selling. It's so important for so many reasons. So if you're in a career, it helps you to stay on track, make strategic decisions. If you're an entrepreneur, it helps you differentiate yourself in the marketplace. Because as my friend of mine, Simon Sinek says people buy why you do what you do, not what you do. So people need to stop selling the what, and start selling the why it makes a difference when you're one of millions, and we all are selling what we sell doing what we do, then there's got to be a way for people to choose Why should I work with you. And our why helps us with that. It's also great for helping us stay on track, and in integrity with who we want to be and what we want to do in the world. It's so important for so many reasons, but not the least of which is human beings are meaning making machines. So when we're focused on meaning that supports us, inspires us, uplifts us motivates us. That's a lot more productive and effective than when we're applying meaning and stories aka stories that undermine us stop us that not enough BS, all of those kinds of stories and meanings that we apply to things that that don't help us be who we want to be. So, two reasons why it's important, but there's a there's a few.

I want to unpack a couple of them, you know, definitely resonates with me as far as the connecting to your journey as far as connecting to the past in the present in the future. I know my Y has everything to do with the pain I have from from my father and my my childhood and how to shift into change that with being now the parent and what I've done with my children and for the last now 27 years years, 28 years, being a parent, that's been one of my major focuses is everything is being the antithesis of the pain I grew up with, has been my major underlying why with everything I've done. So So resonates. Yeah. You, you mentioned how the y then dictates or connects with what you do? Can you go a little bit deeper in that? What? What do you mean by that?

Sure. So my y just to give you an example, for thread to follow my why is that I want you to get that you matter, and live like you do. And the reason that that's the case is because I always wanted to matter, I wanted to get on the damn list. Never mind the top a list, I just wanted to get on the list. And, and so what I see what I resonate with is people who longed to matter. And because it's the filter that I see the world through, and and everything I've done from being a print shop operator to being a VP and a fortune 500 company to the four iterations of my business, underlying everything is always that I want people to get that they matter. And, and so it comes through now, as a coach, of course, a big part of what I do coach trainer is really underneath everything is that it's counterbalancing, the BS story of not enough, and supporting people in being the difference that only they can be. Why? Because they matter, their voice, their contribution matters. So my y drives everything I do. If I'm making a decision about working with someone, does it support me and moving closer to that? Why? Or does it take me further away? If I'm thinking about how I'm showing up in the world? Am I getting that I matter? Am I showing up that way? Am I living into it? You know, I have clients who we ultimately especially in the coaching world, most coaches in my experience, all but most coaches come from that space of wanting to have the support they wish they had had at a certain point in their life. They they saw pain, they saw me they saw something that wasn't working, and they wanted to be the opposite of that. So like in your example, you didn't get the love you wanted in the way you wanted when you were a kid and you want it to be that for your children. And I would say for your tribe, which are just your extended children really. And, and be that loving support and and progress, you know, progress provider for them. Because that's what you really wanted when you were little right. So I think knowing our why helps inform what we do, how we do it, who we do it with, and really being able to check, are we on track? Or are we off track. And ultimately, it's our motivator. It's our drive. It's our thing that we're trying to get met. So from a from an internal spiritual grounding context, whatever you want to call that perspective, we need to know this. But also very practically, we need to convey it. So if we can't tell people why we do what we do, then how are they going to know whether or not we can help them. positioning our why, for example, in our about us as a really practical level really makes a difference. Most people think your about us is about you. It's not really it's about what, what you can do for them. And so as all of our marketing and our websites and all of that, like you know that I've heard you say, a bunch of times yourself, and our why is that way to connect with people. So my y that I use in speeches that I talk about, I use what I call a Genesis story, a really practical story or an experience that I had when I was little, that kind of explains why I love entrepreneurship, why it's so important for me, to empower women to live on purpose, but more importantly, to profit from it. And, and the simple story is that when I grew up, I grew up really rough for lots of chaos. And I really wanted to book Heidi when I was four, almost five, and really wanted it because books were my refuge was my place to be run away and be safe. I had taught myself how to read. And that was my safe place. So there were lots of chaos and violence in the home. And I begged my mom for this book as only a very determined area shell can over and over. Mom, can we have it Mom, can we buy the book? Please, please, please can we go get it? I really want this book. Please. Please. How about now how about now how about now? Finally she turned around one day and screamed at me and said no, we can't afford it. Now I'd heard that a lot growing up, but That day, I still remember viscerally to this day, the look on her face, the look of shame, and anger and sadness and frustration. And I can remember as a five year old, swearing to myself that I never wanted to see that look on her face. Again, I never wanted to see it on mine, and I never wanted to see it on anyone else's. And that's part of why it's so important to me. You know, you said women and men, I love men, I love working with men. And one of the things the best things I do with them for them, is have a bunch of happy, healthy women show up to be with them. And, and I work with a few smart men too, but but the the thing is when women, when women can say yes to the contribution they they can want to be and want to make their happier. So are the kids are the men, so it's the planet. So that's why I do what I do.

Knowing your why. And being able to identify really important it builds that story builds that that connectivity with the people that you're that you're looking to share with? How do we actually utilize it? Are there specific steps specific things to do to utilize it to help increase our sales to market our products or services? In that regard? What What is it where to do with this?

Well, first of all, it lots and first of all, it can be really hard to figure out your why on your own. That's why it really helps to have someone be able to reflect back to you listen, and and pull it out of you and help you craft it. Because because we're just too close to it, right? Like we can't see the label from inside the jar.

So before you move on with that, I absolutely want to double down on that. It is one of those processes that it took me years. And I started off with a background in clinical psychology, a background in social psychology, a background and in talking about personal development. For decades before I got crystal clear with what is my underlying real focused energy, why with purposeful intent it and it took all the outside people really helping me working me through it, talking it telling the story, retelling it and sharing. So that process is so powerful. Because once you have it, it sets you free. Because for me, I know that when I got clear with my why it enabled me to not only talk about it and share it, which was therapeutic. It, it helped me release the angst and the pain around it. So that all that was left was the empowerment. Yes. Yeah. And that's really key. And so, so important. I didn't want that to get lost in the shuffle to work with someone to work through it is vital. Chances are you won't go deep enough you won't. You'll just barely scratch the surface. And I don't know and I'm gonna sidetrack ours our question for just a moment. Because that's really key. Have you had people and I know I have where I started talking to them about what their y was. And they stop at a superficial level. They stop at well, I want to help the world I just love everyone. And and when you when I started there was one person in particular I did this I started scratching the surface and the angst and anger that came through as I was as I was looking to get past that they were not going to move that wall no matter what. Yes, but have you experienced that and what what what's your reaction? How do you manage that? Oh, what are what are what is that about?

There's like three quest for questions in there. But yes, absolutely. In the 300 plus interviews I've done on my podcast over the last three four years. I always ask them what's your why two people in that time have actually answered with their why the rest answer with what they do. How they do what they do their tools their this their that I love people I just have to be you know, I love to help people all of that world peace. Yeah, exactly. And, and that just makes us sound like everyone else right? When I say to people, I never want to see the look on another woman's face of having to say no to your kid about buying a book and So I want you to have the power to say yes to what matters to you. They get that more viscerally than then if I just say, hey, I want you to be empowered, or I want you to be able to make money or look the stuff that everyone else says. And then I go on and talk about the fact that, you know, kids don't overcomplicate things adults do and so I was like, oh, problem, no money solution, get money. And so I had seen someone have a garage sale, so I decided I was gonna have a garage sale. My mom was gone at work, she worked three jobs if someone was probably supposed to be watching me, but you know, it was 1964, not so much then. And 65. And so I just hold everything I carry out of the house priced it because I'd seen someone do this, sold it. And I was so thrilled. Paul, when I mom came home, I had $13.72, which I remember to this day, I came out of the womb entrepreneurial, I'm pretty sure I could count before I could talk think read. And I ran up to her and said, look, look $13.72 I had a bidness or now we can get the book. And I was thrilled. And I thought problem solution, right? He didn't quite see it that way. When she found out I told her brand new dress and some household knickknacks, and an iron and a bunch of stuff, including my toys, too. Anyway, I got spanked took my money, the short version of the story is I got spanked, she took my money, I had to go back and buy back things didn't get my toys back, didn't get the book. And so many people would say not a very good entrepreneurial first venture. But to me, I learned some valuable things. The first is don't go into business with family. It's bad idea. Number Number two is business absolutely can be the way to have what you want in life, to say yes and to to solve problems. And to get what you desire. For me, it was learning and knowledge and and still is. And so it is a powerful tool, and our destinies in our hands, we can make choices and make decisions. So that's why I've been supporting entrepreneurs for over 40 years now. Because I still love it. I still love that that is the case, there's a cause and effect. And there is a control the illusion of control that we have more so than when you're an employee that is wonderful about this, but it also allows us to put our gifts in the world. So I'm segwaying a bit but let me come back to your question. So yes, people struggle with that. Why did they resist it? Mostly because they don't know. They really don't. And it's deep. And it's often connected to one of our biggest wounds. I was listening to an audio book by Viola de lis Davis. her autobiography, I can't remember the title right now. It was a brilliant line in there about a conversation with Will Smith. about who are you? And and you know, it's a brilliant conversation. I highly recommend the book if only for that. His answer was I'm that 15 year old boy that got dumped by the girl and and never has felt quite good enough since then. That's who he is that what's motivates him what drives him. Now, you know, I bet that there's something before that 15 year old experience, but still, it's what it's what makes us it's what gives us our frame on the world. And it's really hard to see, you know, it's like the glasses we look through. I can't see my glasses, but I look through them every day. Right so other people can see our glasses. So part of it is it's hard for us to see. Another part is people think well it's business I shouldn't be talking about personal stuff. My short answer to that is poppycock. Let's get over it. We are human beings, and people need to know who you are so they can trust you. Really your why expedites the know like trust factor. It separates you and let them know that not only do you have a brain, but you've got a heart. And that matters more than ever these days, especially post COVID. It helps with fostering connection faster. There's so many ways that it is practical for us, but practical in our business and in the world. It has people show up more authentically. And authenticity can be scary, because we have that not enough story running. If I am just who I am, it won't be enough. Whether it's I'm not smart enough, I'm not good enough. I'm not, you know, skinny enough, old enough, young enough whatever the story is, that's running for everyone. And so that's typically what blocks the why being enough. And and it's it's not about enough, it's just what is so we might as well capitalize on it and profit ourselves and others from it by by bringing that to the table in some practical ways.

Your key to highlight the farm If I'm just who I am, it's not good enough. Yeah, I've known that as being called the imposter syndrome. Many people refer to it as that there are other names for it. It is that, that struggle of am I living congruently? Am I actually worthy? Am I creating the illusion? Or Is this really me? And and am I will I be loved? If all it all it is me, and they see that clearly? Yes, that resonates with so many people, if not every thought, yes.

They either feel that, yeah, they either resonate because they get it now. Or they kind of resonated because they will someday. And you know, you and I were talking before the show, you were very kindly listening to the fact that I'm going through some of that myself right now, I have been in business for over 40 years, have four iterations, my company have built multiple people's multiple, seven figure businesses have made millions over the year of myself. And I'm in a stage of up against my imposter stuff up against my, you know, fraud stuff, should I quit yada, yada? Which, by the way, I don't go through very often, but when I do, man, apparently I do. And I loved your brilliant comment about and in fact, I said, I'm gonna steal it make it a meme is, there is no level of success that is immune to our humanity, to being a human being. And so thank you, that really was very supportive. And you're right. And it just, there's no level of success at which the No, not enough doesn't come up. We just get hopefully a little better at not listening to it and giving it much credence,

Here, here. Yeah. And hear that loud and clear. Just because it's in your head doesn't mean it's worthy to listen to.

Yes, exactly. And, you know, one of the most brilliant questions I've ever been asked is, Whose voice is that? Because it's in our head and sounds like as we think it's us? Most of the time, it is not. So Whose voice is that? It's a great question to ask. But I, you know, I know we could talk forever, Paul, I want to come back to the really practical application piece. So one of the things I highly recommend is a get help getting your why clear? Be be willing to use it in your introduction, stop saying what you do for the love of God, when people say, what do you do? They don't care what you do. They care about what what you do will do for them? So answer that question. But answer it with a difference. You know, when when, you know, I'm networking, I never say I'm a coach or trainer or a business growth specialist. I don't even say I'm the expansionist or the why whisperer, I will say something that is relevant to that person about where they're at. And I'll say it relevant or connected to my why, you know, something like I, what I do is help people figure out the number one thing that they're missing, that's keeping them from actually stepping forward the way they want to, or something like that, that was a little bit lame, but it's usually a little more about action, but something like that, that is more connected to my why and their, their actual stage and what they're really asking. So use it in your introductions, use it in your networking, use it on your about us page lead with your why, for the love of God, go to your about us page, if you do nothing else from this podcast, and if you have at the beginning, you know, so and so person is a coach and this and that and and this and that, and they have this training and that training, take that off, or move it to the very last line. Because no one cares and all you're doing is blathering and they have to read until the or listen until you get to the part that they care about which is what's in that for them related to all of that so leave with that.

I love you and I'm thinking crap, what do I have on my about you pay

Change it,

I would absolutely almost predict it is the traditional rather than and here's something for all of you listening the congruence see of your marketing message is so important. And, and I know man over 16 years for me and and 3040 years for us both as entrepreneurs. It is that that oh we did this piece and then this piece this piece and we built it all in in segments in our world. Go back and figure and create that congruence. See? Because I know I tell my why verbally and I talk about it when I'm networking I took but I don't know what or it's on my about up on my website, I created that a while ago just cut and paste and kept moving forward. Yeah. So that's definitely go back to those key components to that congruence of messaging, it becomes so important. Highlight,

Yeah, put it into your introductions, put it into your bios, put it into your speeches, if you're making presentations lead with that, rather than saying, here, I should tell you about me. So that, you know, I tell the story about the book, or the Heidi book, or I tell I have a couple of other keynotes or key Genesis stories that I call them, that depending on the audience, and the purpose that I use, that lets them know who I am, what motivates me, and why I can help them with what it is that we're going to be talking about, because it creates credibility as well, because I tied into, you know, therefore, because that happened, I learned all of this and did all of this. And now I can support people with getting dealing with that. And it deepens the conversation, which automatically differentiates you. Differentiation is so important these days, because we are competing on a global market. We weren't five years ago, as much. And now, if you are a coach, you are competing with coaches around the world, millions of them who do what you do, or if you're any kind of service provider expert. You if you talk about what you do, you're not serving them are very quickly there's three things, four things that I tell my clients, one is premises the problem, what's the problem you saw? Promise is where you're going to take them to at the top of the mountain, what's the view process is how you're going to get them up there. No one cares about the process until they know that you get their problem. And they have clarity about Yes, I want that promise. Once you have those two things dialed in, maybe you can talk about the process, maybe not. But the third or the other component that ties into that and ties those things together is Why do you care about that problem? And getting them to that top of that mountain? Why does that matter to you that will make the difference in connecting and sales calls and converting in having more powerful stories in your speaking in being this more effective all around. So I think it's important. I'm passionate about supporting people in getting the meaning of that for themselves, and really just being more effective in their business because they're connecting at a much more authentic and effective level.

So powerful. First, first lesson is, you cannot go alone, you cannot do this alone, get assistance, get help to work through exactly what that that why isn't that story is then learn how to implement it into your business in your life, to build connections to build process, and to grow and develop. And really what we're talking about is growing and developing your network which serves both personal and business relationships, and results oriented conclusion to everything you want to achieve in your world has to do with your network and your connections with that network. And your why is the is the lynch T of it all, say the least and opens up so many doors. Yes. Yep, yep. Yep. Just amazing.

It's fun. It's fun to explore and play with and use. And it makes us not sound like everybody else, which is a great relief.

Yes, that I do highlight that to sound different kind of like what we're talking about here and doing things different. Yes. All these things are in play in your in your world, to create a difference in your life and in our society. With all the people that are listening in, we've got people from all around the world. bits of advice, last nugget that say, Man, I'd love you to know this.

Okay, well. And you might go to this next, but basically what I what I said earlier was that it's really hard to do yourself because it's right there on the end of our nose, we can't see it. And so it'd be kind of mean of me to say you really need this, and you need help, but I'm not gonna help you with that. So what I would love to do is offer your people and by the way, this is now a paid product that I that I offer for 297. But I would love to give to your people. A why whisper session and there will be a link potentially in the show notes where you can book directly on the calendar. It's a long URL, so I won't spell it out. If you if you don't see that you can't find that reach out to me at Jeanette At at badass city.ca Day A n n e t t e at badass at Bo da ci t y.ca for Canada and just say I heard John Paul, I want to know my why can we talk and I will be happy to do that work with you to support you in getting clarity about it. So you can apply it so you can use it. And so you can actually just be happier about the oh, okay, now I get it. Now I get why I get out of bed in the morning. Now I get what to say to people, when they asked me that damn question about what do you do? Now I now I have a lot of clarity about a lot of things. So happy to support with that, please reach out to me genetic audacity.ca. And I think probably the last thing I'd want to just offer is there was there's this beautiful quote that Viola Davis uses at the front of her book about it's from some great philosopher, and it's really long, so I can't really remember it right now. But the gist of it was, and all of a sudden done. What is important in our lives is the meaning that we have contributed and that we have experienced. And business is no different. We need to make sure we are contributing and being the difference that we're here to be. And one of the best ways to do that is to know your why.

Powerful. Oh my gosh, thank you so much. Absolutely take advantage. There is a link right here, wherever you're looking, there's a link right here to be able to get in touch with Jeanette to be able to grab hold of this consult. It is a just an amazing opportunity. do a deeper dive and get clarity with what your why is and watch it. open doors for you in so many ways. It's absolute pleasure, Jeannette, so pleased to have you here. Thank you so much for joining us.

Thank you, Paul. And thank you for being a maker of Mavericks because the world needs more people who are willing to do things differently.