Breaking New Ground: Moodiness Slows Down Your Soul’s Progress | EP 014

Welcome to mash in life's adventures, an educational podcast about tapping into your true self, the soul, your soul, the substance of your life, to discover what life's ups and downs are really about, and how to have a greater sense of purpose, peace, joy, and fulfillment. I am Dr. Judith holder and your host, Coach psychologist Delos seeker, he enjoys diving into the connections between spirituality, psychology, wellness, and your everyday life's adventures. All comparing and polishing you like the fast is a magnificent diamond to be your best self. If you're craving more from your life, you are in the right place. Come let's journey together and transforming what you know. And to who you really are mastering mice adventures begins now.

Glad to be back to talk about something that a lot of people experience and they don't quite know what to do with what they are experiencing. So I just have a few thoughts about that. That might be helpful. So one of the things I wanted to talk about was moodiness. You got it moodiness and you wake up in the morning time and you feel you got a bad mood, or it's irritable. Or the things seem like they're bothering you just upon waking up in the morning time. And it's as if you got out of the wrong side of the bed. You didn't get on the right side you got on the wrong side of the bed. And it feels like this moodiness is like a dark cloud that's hanging over you, following you wherever you go. Creating kind of the darkness, in your temperament in your discussions in your verbal and nonverbal behaviors. What happens that moodiness seems like you're waked up with it? Have you thought about that? Think of that analogy I told you. And another episode about the drawbridge and the moat, that you have a castle and the castle is you. And, and the drawbridge is down in the moat is around you as a protective element, but because you have the drawbridge down, many things can come across that drawbridge. These may have been things that have happened over a week period of time, or something that's happened over a month period of time, over a year, over decades. So we've had this drawbridge down as relates to our feelings and what triggers us to feel moody. And so you may think about well, it's okay for me to be moody, if I'm having a bad day. Actually, it is not because it does not help your soul and your soul evolution and growth. And that we're working on itself mastery of ourselves. So let's get back to that drawbridge so it is down. So you have the things that are coming across it. And you have experiences and situations and that are creating some degree of negativity or some degree in which you're finding you're fretting or worrying or feeling anxious about or feeling overwhelmed about and all this is coming all over the drawbridge and we're not realizing that brought drawbridge let's down all this is going to have an impact upon your internal Castle, which is you your your sense of self, and your sense of the good qualities in which you can be able to give to others. So over time, come across to Dr breaks all these different types of triggers that can attack your confidence that impact your self esteem, impacting your attitude, or your sense of what's just and what is injustice being done. And you're finding that you're getting more irritable because of some of the situations or conversations you had, you know with your spouse, or the situation that you had with a colleague at work or a situation that you had with being in the doctor's office and getting some bad news, all impacting your your sense of self and also your sense of feeling moody all this revolving around person event situations with other individuals circumstances that are how not be to your liking is creating an upsetness and it can also create a sense that you're being moody with friends. Moody moodiness as friends so you have the moodiness and friends that occupying more your attention, your thoughts, your feelings, even your behaviors. So what are these this moodiness for friends? First blueness is a state in which we feel that there is this kind of shroud of negativity or feeling bad or feeling awkward, or feeling sulky, or feeling that you're more morose and how you're feeling status. And the friends that are helping you with that isn't the irritability friend and the anger friend, and, you know, humor friend, that is making jokes that are maybe inappropriate, that that's taking place, you also have this other quality of the silent treatment, you know, and that's kind of the moodiness part, or the friend factor, you know, is like I'm being moody. And now I, you know, in order to show you that, you know, I'm not in a great mood, and don't bother me, it ends up being you get the silent treatment, you give the silent treatment to other individuals, so you don't tell them what's going on with you. But they can experience and sense your energetic level, to know that something's up. You're not a happy camper at all. And maybe I don't need to be around you for that purposes. And so what this creates off sometimes, and I'm reading this too, is greater isolation. And to the degree that we get more isolated, the more we make it even more moodier as well. And then there is the walking on eggshells that happens with as part of this moodiness and friends. So we're walking other people around, you may be walking on eggshells, because they just don't know what's gonna go on or how you're going to respond or react to their questions, and so they're tiptoeing around you. And then, because the moodiness has been such a big issue for you, because even if their cycles, they mean you may be fine for a period of time or anyone that is around you may be fine. And then when they get into the fall time, then that's when they experience the greater degrees of moodiness, some of that may be something that they have to take up with a practitioner in terms of the sad which is seasonal affective disorder, to be able to help them there may be some chemical imbalances that are taking place and neurotransmitters that are needed through a medication, but I'm not necessarily a proponent of the first thing you do is go to medication, or I my first proponent is CPOE be aware of what's going on and see if you can have some mastery over it. But I'm not disowning the need for medication for some individuals because that moodiness moves into clinical depression for example. So let's just keep focused around the moodiness and, and realize that there's some complexities that are around moodiness that may be related to neurochemical imbalances that are taking place. But that's not what we're getting into in our discussion. And this episode is just talking about overall moodiness that we wake up on in the morning time is a long side of the bed, and we are now having to have other people experience on moodiness. And that is something we have to be aware of that we can be what is what I calls a willfulness stance, I'm gonna stick I'm gonna stick with my moodiness even though it's not helping you, but you know, it's just the way yeah, that is what people will say. Even again, again, it's not helping you. It's not helping your soul. And the growth of your soul of the soul needs to be able to move forward because it's weighing it down. And that moodiness can be a habit. And we're not realizing there's certain times certain situations moodiness seems to happen every Thursday before I have to meet but blah, blah, blah, I get really moody about it. Or every time then I hit the month and fill in the blank September or or February or January, I get into that moodiness may have been related to events that have occurred to you in those months or situations and those months. So it can become a habit is similar to like a hamster wheel of negative emotions, the wheel goes on and the mice is in that hamster wheel and is just key and continues and the same thing continue to do the same thing. And around and around and around dude goes. But that's what a habit pattern is. That habit pattern forms over a period of time, and it's around and around and around gets tighter and tighter becomes until it becomes like an automatic expression or our habits or behaviors. What I want to say is that he becomes a habit that is a behavior that we think is automatic, and therefore since it's automatic, it's must be me, right? No. It's just that a habit can habits can be broken by intention, consistency.

in being able to work on another path to develop a ritual or a momentum around becomes a new habit for yourself. But moodiness can also be like the murkiness of a deep love pond. It's murky, you don't know how even deep that pond is, you just know Oh, it's kind of deep, but maybe a lot deeper than you realize. Because that deep pond is dark. So you really can't see because it's murky. The depths of what this moodiness is, and we're where it's coming from, at the subconscious unconscious levels within us, which we've talked about another episode. So the subconscious and unconscious have a play of sometimes why we wake up on the wrong side of the bed, is because we're not consciously aware that for the past six months past year, we have experienced a lot of stress under a particular situation that has happened to you or with a particular person that has gone on or a particular circumstance that has taken place, and now is kind of developed itself and just feeling moody, about things. But remember, I said our moodiness puts your soul, which is a substance of your life in a straitjacket. It immobilizes you, it does allow you to be able to make contact with the soul, which allows you to have a greater sense of what is the wise thing that I need to do here. So you have to be a lot more intentional about the choices that you want to make to move yourself at it the moodiness and those choices are thinking about how can I take the high road or the highest road and not allow my moodiness to dictate my now illness. Instead, I'm going to allow the high end living of each day to say what I want and how I want to be how I want to show up how I what I want to cultivate and myself. So that is not the moodiness is just rampant. And it's just it is what it is. So when I talk about this, cultivating quality, want to cultivate peace, happiness, kindness. pleasantness even in the midst of experiencing this moodiness it doesn't dictate who you really are. Who you really are, is your sole substance. It's just an issue that has come up, because this develops a habit with you. And as I said, habits can be broken. And yes, I know there's some more complicating issues and neuro chemistry that happens in the body and what goes on with people. Yeah, but if you need to see the appropriate resource or for a practitioner, to help you be physical, in terms of the physician, or for a psycho emotional for a therapy, then yes, go for, go forth and do that. But overall, our moodiness can be tackled can be mastered. Or you can have greater mastery over it does require a choice, that consistent choice and not to believe that your moodiness is who you are. Again, the substance of your life is your soul. That is really who you are. And it's continuously learning to evolve and to grow into advance. And so, one of the things that one has to do, if you're trying to now develop triggers of happiness and kindness and pleasantness, then first and foremost, you got to stop the should be the should be is yes, should be should do this, this person should have done that. I should have done this. This should never have happened. Should keeps us stuck. The reality is a may have happened. It may have taken place. We've got to deal with what is that's the mastery on a day to day basis that we're learning to be able to do in real life. I will always get it right. But we keep on trying to do our best. Because we're seekers walking a spiritual path to something greater and something higher. In our daily living of life, we have to be moving away from the BS, which actually just poison our mind, the poisoning to our mind, because our mind revolves around the shirts, and revolves around how the shirts didn't happen, and why need to be angry, or had an impact on my confidence, or had an impact upon my ability to really speak my mind. I'm just like, you know, those all saboteurs to your greater good? Or could be those should bees get into the negative vortex of feelings. It's like you get into this vortex of how you feel. And you now make those feelings, negative feelings as if they're your reality. And we have to be the same. Just because I feel this negativity. But is this truly the substance of who I am? No, it isn't. It's just a negativity. It's another form saboteurs trying to occupy space within you. That drawbridge analogy, remember, and that drawbridge, you've got to pull it up. You got to say, I'm not going to continue to evolve around these thoughts and these feelings and memories and reactions, what are they giving me? What are they getting me. And if they're not getting you are giving you something that is uplifting, that is harmonious, that is allowing you to be able to continue to grow and be alert and aware to how your ego persona is getting in the way. She already talked about that about ego persona, how it may be getting in the way if we're not be intentional as seekers, and what are we doing? Seekers, what's something greater than themselves, they want something more they know there's something more. And they're, they're pleased when they are walking that path and having greater self mastery of themselves. Because it gets them further along. And that light in love and a greater stillness and hearing the inner voice, which is the wise part of ourselves. So when we can clear the deck of this moodiness and get away from the shirts, and start to develop triggers of happiness and kindness and pleasantness by the thoughts, the feelings and the actions and the physical things that we do. We're headed in the right direction to reducing the moodiness and increasing our inner contact with our soul, the substance of our life. So what are things can we do to help us to develop the triggers of if you want to call them that, just as you have triggers that make you more negative or moody or morose or sullen or sad? It's like, okay, can't we also have triggers that enlighten us, that help us to boy us up and help us feel better? And move us in the direction of positivity that we would like to go in? Yeah, I think we can. So what are some of those triggers? I want you to start thinking about those triggers, that can give you the positiveness that frees your soul, a freeze your inner slough, you know, to have the space for your soul, to be able to give you the guidance that you need. So one trigger is uplifting music, not this jagged, jagged type of music that we kind of have going on in the world right now, in some places, but the the classic music of the Beethoven's box the music, the hands, like a for timing. I did research when I was an undergrad, about the impact of music on our being and, and one of the things that I walked away with when I was doing some research, literature, reviews of music was is that music that had a four four timing to it actually was in the rhythm of the heart, which gave us a greater sense of harmony and peace and not have a syncopated beat to it. But had that for for timing. So look for music that has a for for timing, that gets in the rhythm of the cadence of the heart, which we're trying to cultivate too. And then another quality is being out in nature. It's like when you're moody, get out, have some sun walk Smile, they literally smile, you know, they say, I am choose to be happy. We have to make a conscious choice, to be happy, to be pleasant, to be intentional, and our kindness that we give to others. And we give to ourselves.

Have a mantra that you can say, that's kind of fun, that allows it to bounce off that allows you to say, you know, I may right now feel moodiness but this too will change. That can be a mantra, this too will change. I no longer accept this as my mood state. I accept as my state of being, which is the cultivation of my soul. That happiness, kindness, pleasantness, calmness, peace, joy. That's what my focus is on. That's what my direction is moving to. And all this other stuff is just, I see them as experiences that are teaching me how am I doing? teaching me how am I doing? So all the experiences around the moodiness and the circumstances of unloading nets and you know what happened to us and the person what they said to us, all experiences, teaching us, what will keep us in a state of being on that balance be in a state that allows us know what takes us off that balance be imperfect allows us get back on the balance be that gives us joy, and the happiness and allows us to feel as that we are expanding ourselves and have greater of that quality of mastery. Over this mood state. This moodiness and frets are no longer friends. Sorry, friends, you don't want to ask friends in the moodiness fret and friends is something you don't want to continue to occupy space within your castle within your temple, your body, again, put the drawbridge up, put the drawbridge up and say no Enough is enough. And all this other stuff in terms of people and situations and circumstances goes into the moment. You know, you are not affected me I shall not be moved. That's another mantra you can have, I shall not be moved by what this person is saying or what this situation is going, I choose not to be moved, I will see it for what it is our handle it has I need to handle it. But I'm not going to get it stuck to me. Yeah, stuck within my inner self creating, creating an occupying space that is within me. So another thing that we can do, as we're looking at developing triggers of happiness and kindness and pleasantness is laughing, laughing at yourself. Having a good show that allows you to chuckle you know about things that Chuck away in that laughter of seeing comedy good comedy on the TV or streaming or whatever device you use, that laughter brings out a form of happiness. It brings out endorphin releases in our body that helps us to get into a different state. So sometimes the trigger can be doing our passion, like a hobby that you enjoy doing, doing that whatever that is, some people love to be out in the garage and working on a project. Some individuals enjoy being in the garden planting. Others may enjoy pipelining and and preparing for a bike race. Their passion is, you know, wanting to be fit. So you're thinking about the things that can be helped you to develop. These are the triggers that trigger me into being at peace, harmony, that trigger me into kindness, in my words, my thoughts, my efforts that I'm doing and engaged in more intentionally that I'm not allowing my moods to be at the unconscious subconscious levels and just percolating up and coming up whenever it wants to know. Now, you say that's your day is done. You're not going to have that degree of control over me. Because that's what moodiness starts, it feels like it controls us. And we are the ones who is the captain of our ship. And that we have to say, this is the direction I choose to move in, in the benefit of my soul, and my soul growth and evolution. Sometimes we do need a buddy, someone who we know, we can say to them, there is a confidant I'm working on this quality that when it comes up, let me know, can you remind me of what I said I was going to do that we can make it forgetful. Because the moon is she's like, it's so badass and so much taking control over our state of being that sometimes we have a good friend, you know, or a good spouse, or even, you know, our adult children can be even helping you. You remember, I see coming up. Now when they're telling you they see this moon is coming up, you should not growl back at them, you should say thank you, thank you for allowing me to be more alert and more aware, and the things that I was going to do to keep moving myself in the right direction. It can be fun. They can you can laugh at yourself. And you do need to because you know moodiness is not it's just a state, it can be changed. And you have the availability to make that change? What you think so? What do you think? What are your thoughts about what you can do? When you find yourself? Or when you talk to other individuals who may want to change them readiness? How can you have for individual walking a spiritual path? We're about helping others to when they asked for it. Or we can ask, Do you need help? If they say, Yeah, I do, then you can step right on it and try to help in a particular way. If they say no, I don't, then you have to kind of take a step back and just say, they do have free will. Now, if they're doing something that's not there's conflict among themselves, you know, they'll know then you've got to move forward with that. But in general, they do have free will to say yes or no in terms of wanting your help or not wanting your house. So that brings up another point, that sometimes this moodiness is so vast, and has been so much of a what I call as density which I talked about in one of the other podcasts, that it's so dense, that it may require some professional help. So we can be encouraging of other individuals to get that professional help. But overall, for many individuals, moodiness is a state that we can be able to do something about. And I thought it would be something that would be good to talk about, and how that you may want to look at it from the lens of being a seeker and from the lens, that spiritually it does hinder your spiritual progress, you saw progress. And we are all about so progress, so evolution, and grow. So I look forward to talk with you in the next episode. Take care. Bye for now.