From Self-Improvement to Life Fulfillment: Daryl Dittmer's Path | EP083

Hello, my name is Shannan Mondor. And I want to welcome you to my podcast fulfilment in faith. Today, our guest is Daryl Dittemrr. And I am so excited to have him. So welcome Daryl, how are you today?

Thank you, Shannan, thank you so much for having me. Wonderful to join you. I am, I am doing really well. Thank you.

So Daryl let's get right into this. And the first thing that I would like you to do for the audience is share with the audience a little bit about yourself, where you are from, and and then you can just go into your story, because you do have an amazing story. And I want everybody to just know what your experiences were.

For sure, no, and it's so important right to share our experiences in the hope that, you know, folks can relate to our stories and maybe find some nuggets that that help them in their lives. And that's, that's my entire purpose at this point, in terms of just wanting to give back what I've been given so so I started off in the Midwest, actually, Michigan is where I was born and raised for the first several years of my life. And at that point in, in Michigan, everybody's dad worked for either GM, Ford or Chrysler. And so my dad was a mechanic and, and that was just that was just how we grew up, I grew up with, with, you know, the old sort of Protestant work ethic that was, that was what was instilled with me instilled in me and imbued in me, and then just ran through every fiber of my being because my dad was a very hard working guy, he worked a ton of overtime, you know, I had an older brother and a younger sister, and, and my mom worked, you know, probably harder, quite honestly, because she took care of his kids at home. And that's a gigantic job, especially the way we sort of sighted to go through our lives early on, but so it was, it was a disciplined household, my mom was sort of in charge of manners, and, you know, just being as solid as we could be. And but it was interesting, because it was kind of, you know, the other side of that was my dad was, was pretty loose, you know, he's a very strict guy, and a guy that you didn't want to trifle with, or, you know, make angry, and, you know, that kind of thing. But, but overall, he was, you know, there was a part of him, that was pretty light. And there was, there was not a whole lot about my mom, that was light. And, and, you know, there was just, there's just stuff, you know, as everybody's family has, and, and so I, I like to think I was into sports, and I was in all those sorts of things and got pretty decent grades when I was a kid. And, and, and then when I was 13, and I swear, the more people I talk about that, you know, in sobriety or in recovery, that, that most of them started when they were 13. I don't know what that is, but I had my first drink. And, and I was, I would say, I was pretty close to drunk by the end of the evening, and I got into trouble right away. And it wasn't any big trouble. It was just this, I was 13. And there was this high school kid, he was older than me bigger than me and, and I kept throwing peanuts in his drink. And he kept getting angry, and I kept doing it, and he kept getting angry. And by the end of that time, he was, he was ready to have his way with me in terms of, you know, just, like knock it off, you're gonna end up in the hospital. And that wasn't me, I didn't like I didn't like trouble. I didn't like, I didn't like pressing anybody, I didn't like any sort of, you know, angst or friction or anything like that. And, and that was a, that was a huge theme in my life at that time. Because on the one hand, you know, I started, I started drinking, and I started doing drugs, and I got into, you know, harder drugs as time went on. But then the other part of me, the other side of me, and it was kind of ripping me in half honestly was, I didn't want to let anybody down. I didn't want anybody mad at me. I didn't want anybody, you know, angry with me or anything like that. So, so I'm doing all these things and I'm getting in trouble and you know, getting in trouble in school and whatever, all that sort of stuff and, and the drinking and the drugging progressed and actually progressed fairly quickly. You know, I didn't have a lot of inhibitions when it came to trying things and that's just kind of what we did. And that's what the group that I hung out with did. And, and some of the group that I hung out with, and this was probably should have been a good indicator that, that there was something going awry. But some of the ones that didn't actually have an issue with it started to fall away, and they started to do other things. And they started to, you know, befriend other people, or at least not engage in some of the things that that myself and some of my colleagues who probably had issues, you know, similar to mine, you know, we just kind of kept going, and I played, I played basketball in high school. And that was something that kind of anchored me a little bit, you know, maybe kept me in a decent spot. I'm tall, I'm six, six, now, I was 6464 and a half as a senior in high school, so. And I played basketball, and I enjoy that I've always enjoyed sports.

Question. Oh, yeah. When you were that age, Darryl, what was your personality? Like? Because I know, like, for my, my experiences, through my experiences, with me being addicted to alcohol, like, were you a quieter person, when you didn't have those substances in your body? Did it draw out? You know, what you want it to be? When you have those substances within your body? What were you acquired, or individual or what made you want to drink so much at those times?

I was born I think, very much. So to be an introvert. I believe I was very. And that's kind of what I'm back to. And some of the things you know, honestly, like podcasts, and all that sort of stuff aren't the most comfortable thing in the world for me to do. And, and but I do them because I know, you know, they can be useful, and they can be helpful. And you know, we can help people by doing these kinds of things. So, so I was definitely an introvert. And, and part of the story is, is is we moved from a little more of a suburban area to more of a country area, when I was 13. And, and we got there and, you know, my dad being about work ethic, he put me in front of this farmer at church, and I grew up Lutheran. So I was I was, you know, here's your box of stuff you have to believe and that was, you know, that was what was handed to me. But he put me in front of this farmer and said, Can you put them to work? And the farmer said, Yeah, I can put them to work. And so you know, I started being a farmhand at a fairly young age, and I wanted to fit in. So I was in this new school, I wanted to fit in, I wanted to be cool. I wanted to hang out with, you know, the people who were, who were popular. And that was, that was the way that I was able to do that. By, you know, just partying as hard or harder than then they did. And, yeah, it was definitely I, it, it, it allowed me to become something that I probably naturally wouldn't necessarily be or wouldn't or didn't grow up being. You know, nowadays I can be as as introverted or as extroverted as I want to be, but I definitely lean toward introvert. So.

And the reason I wanted to ask you that is because the, you know, even before, you know, when I had met you before, and we had the conversation about you even coming on the podcast, I could tell that you were more of an introvert. And I know many people out there that, you know, that I grew up with that are very much introverts, and then just as soon as they had alcohol, it, it was just like, wow, where is this person? You know, I've never seen this person before. So yeah, that was why I asked the question, so

no, I'm glad you did. And I think about that, because I don't I, there's just been so much to the story, but, but I, I was in a yoga class at one point, this was 25 years ago. And we were talking about being introverts or extroverts, and I'm like, oh, yeah, I'm an extrovert. And I was sober at the time and, you know, a little bit for sober for a while at that time, and, and everybody's like, no, no, you're an introvert, what's wrong with you? And I don't, you know, I just never really thought about it. So I, I kind of embrace the introvert. Part of me because, to me, this is getting a little off topic, but to me, it allows me to be to be quiet, it allows me to settle down it allows me to go inward and and I think those are all really, you know, positive things for building my inner life.

Absolutely. I couldn't agree with you more like I really embrace that introvert aspect of me now. Because I know that that is my connection between me and the universe. And that's when I get my intuitive hits, my creativity comes through, and I just embrace it. And that is such a blessing that I have that awareness to. And that's the same with you. And it's beautiful and amazing thing ever. Because when we're constantly being an extrovert, right, that's usually when that those are busy times, though, those are our masculine energy times where we're doo doo doo, doo doo. But at the same time, the extrovert in us, is the times where we don't want to cope with things. Because if we go into our introvert stage, then we have to sit with ourselves, and so many people are so uncomfortable doing that, and I just look at that as that's an absolute blessing. And Saudi, and that's the most wonderful, beautiful thing of awareness. Right?

It is, it is, I, I feel like my time and I, and I'm, I have the personality to be, you know, just extreme and go and drive and, you know, all that sort of stuff. And so I, I love tempering that with with the quiet and breathing practices, and meditation practices and those sorts of things. And, and when I come out of those, and I'm, you know, and I'm, and I nurture that awareness throughout the day, and that sort of thing, and gratitude and all those kinds of things, but, but you know, I can get back to it. And I can do it from a different frame. I can get back to the business, I can, but it's, but it's a different. It's coming from a different place. It's not a frenetic place. It's, it's a call and place. And it's, you know, it's a it's a pretty cool process. So I know yeah,

now I totally took us in a totally different direction. So let's get back to your story. So you were playing basketball in high school?

Yeah, so So the reason I say that is because I was I was a decent athlete, and I got I got a letter, there was a letter that showed up at the high school that I went to, from the University of Wisconsin Stout, and they asked me to play basketball for them. And, and Mrs. W came in with that with that letter one day, and she said, Hey, I got this. And, you know, what do you think and I and I was from it was a small town. So people kind of knew, and, and I didn't care at that point, I didn't care I didn't, there was I don't come from a college educated family. So there wasn't any real expectation, like, oh, Daryl is going to go to college, he's going to become this and that, whatever it just, it just wasn't that way, in my family. So. So I get this, you know, I see this letter, and I just don't think about it, all I can think about is the next drink the next drug the next time, you know, I'm gonna be able to have time and be able to do that. And, you know, it got to be several times a day, every single day. And, and it got to a point and I'll, you know, there was there was trouble. That was all there was all kinds of, you know, crazy stories and that kind of thing, but, but it got to a point where it my my parents, it was basically an intervention. I don't know if that's what they call them way back then. But it was an intervention, they, you know, they they approached me and confronted me and, and it was it was basically a decision where I needed to either go talk to this drug and alcohol counselor, or just go away and, you know, figure my stuff out alone and get out of their lives. So that was

a bad was it getting for you, Daryl at that time?

I was well, so here's the here's the sort of pivotal story that I like to share, just so. So we know. After I wanted to talk to this counselor between then and when I went to treatment and went to treatment on January 3 of 1985, the the so I was just over, just became 19 years old. I was a freshly minted 19 year old and, and New Year's Eve 1984 Going into 1985 I was at this party with I don't know, I don't even remember it was a couple 100 people or 100 people or something and it was it was a large group people a lot of friends a lot of people that I knew and but I was the loneliest I'd ever been in my life. I was the most distraught I'd ever been in my life and I and I seriously considered just ending it at that point. And that was that was what it came to for me and and I think there's you know, there's there's there's the stories, there's the stuff there's the cops, there's the this there's the that but we all we all come together On the playing field of what's going on in here, you know, the all the stories out, there are what they are. But we all are on the level playing field of, you know, we're all going to feel the fears, we're all going to feel the angst, we're all going to feel the, you know, the, the anger and the trepidation, and the, and the despair and all of those things. And, and that's the point it got to for me, where I just, I didn't feel like I really wanted to be on this earth anymore. And, and so a couple days later, I go into treatment. And, you know, that was, I don't even remember that I remember being in detox for three days, and I and there was a, I was I felt like I was being pulled down into something evil. And I remember this and I was in I was like, I was being pulled like, down. And it was just such a creepy, intense, powerful feeling, but in a very negative way. And I remember when I came to, and I don't remember how it actually happened, but I sort of came out of it. And I was my body was being pulled off the bed down onto the floor. And, and it was just this very surreal sort of circumstance and, and I woke up from that. And I think I went to sleep, but it was like, I was just I was so taken by that and so affected by that it just felt like I was being like, that was almost the point where there was a choice, like which way you're going to go, are you going to go down are you going to get back up. And, and so over the course of time, and I you know, I haven't relapsed since that time. But I also, you know, that's when life starts. And, and for me, that's when my life actually kicked off. Because because I was 19 years old, I didn't have a clue about how to live anyway, I didn't have a prayer on anything to do within here, you know, I just didn't know what it was what to do. But, but I got involved in the 12 steps. And then that was one of the things I got out of treatment treatment was a 30 day program inpatient for me and, and two things I got out of treatment. One was, I got the 12 steps as a blueprint, and this is how I look at it now. But a blueprint for living, it was a blueprint for how to they say, trust God, clean house help others, right, that's, that's how I've broken down the steps for a long time. And, and so it showed me how to how to finally surrender how to, you know, stop all of this, this fighting and believe in something greater than me. And, and, and then you know, clean up the garbage, clean out the clean the streets, you know, clean my side of the street, all of those lessons came from the 12 steps for me.

What really attracted me to you when we did our meet and greet was the fact that you were 19 years old. And you had your awakening to awareness at 19 years old. And that was one thing that I really, really, you know, I look back and it took me August 17 2019, when I was 50 years old, to have that same experience that you had at such a young young age. And that is something that yeah, I was just so amazed with because how many other people out there aren't even there yet. And they're older than I am old, older than us. And I just you know, I just think for anybody that's listening out there, that's, you know, they're you, you are so blessed. Yeah, that was one thing. I was just like, gosh, you know, we can never go back on our past. But you know, anybody that's listening right now that you're struggling, you can be 19 You could be 50 like I was, but you know what, there's always that starting point. And that is so true. When you would said that was when your life began. My life began actually on August 17. And I was 50 years old. And I've never been more alive. I've never been more happy. I've never created so much in my entire life, like I'm at the happiest state that I could ever ever be in. And it's that was my time to start. That was your time to start. So you can start at any age. And that's the biggest thing that I want people to understand is that that that's it right? You know, so and what a powerful moment for you. You don't have to experience that and you did actually experience that right in the treatment there. You know I mean, you, you could feel something happened within you.

Powerful, unbelievably powerful. That was. Yeah, that was and it's it's difficult to interpret, but the only way I can interpret it is there was that tug between good and evil was I going up? Or was I going down? You know, that was that was kind of what it was. And, and

I was the same way, when I woke up that day, when I decided I'm not going to drink anymore, there is something going on within you. And it's and that's the thing, what path am I going to take, because the path that I'm on obviously hasn't worked. So you know, if I can get past that fear, that anxiety, all of that, to just push through, you know, to go to that next level, which I'm being pulled to or being called to do. But But I think once you have that awakening to awareness, we all experience that, when when we decide once and for all with the guidance of the universe, but it's just a matter of how we interpret it. You know, it is, it's, it's the most powerful thing that that you will ever experience. And still to this day, there's still nothing that can compare to it.

100% agree, and I get those, I at this point in my life, and I will say I'm so grateful. And you mentioned being blessed, and I and 100% there is there is no doubt, it's, it's a blessing to be, to have been able to embrace a different life at such a young age. And I'm, I don't know how that all works, you know, but I do feel like, like, it's my, my opportunities to help others started a long time ago. And it took me a long time to, to feel like I could contribute to others and I could, you know, help other people and, and that's a wonderful feeling. But, but it really does just keep getting better. I'm I'm fascinated by. And I know that, you know, fulfilment and faith. Faith is one of the most important things for me. Because I know I'm being led, I know I'm being I'm being shown. And and that's just a, it's a really cool feeling. And I don't have to define who's showing me it doesn't have to be the God that I grew up with. It doesn't have to be anything else. It doesn't there's there is no definition. It's just, it's as simple as I'm being led, I'm being shown. And I either listen, and go along, or I go kicking and screaming. And normally when I'm kicking and screaming, and that's, you know, that's when I get myself into trouble.

And what I love about it is the clarity. Individuals like us now that we have none of those substances within our body, we know deep in our heart that it's from we're being guided because of the clarity that we feel within ourselves. And I think that's the most important thing ever. Yeah, everything is crystal clear.

Yep, the messages are there, the the little that still small voice is there. I had a sponsor a long time ago. And, and one of the things he said to me, they're, they're, you know, pivotal moments right in our lives where we hear something or somebody tells us something, and it just pings and then it sticks around for the rest of your life. And one of those moments for me was when my sponsor said, you know, we all see in the 12 steps, if we're involved in 12 steps, and however, anybody decides to get sober, that's completely cool. As long as it works, that's all I care about. But in the 12 steps, they would say things like First things first and one day at a time, and, you know, all of those little sayings and and I didn't really know what they meant. I didn't have a clue. And I was young. And my sponsor said to me, he said Daryl, first things first, and the rest will be added on. He said, This is how it works. If you take care of here first, all of this stuff works out if you if you there's a chapter in my book, I call it the nouns and, and there's only three things in this world that we don't have any control over people, places and things right now and so, so the only thing that I can affect is here. And and if I do that, and I take that responsibility, and I move my life from that perspective, that's how everything else works out. That's that's the end the rest will be added on.

Now I want to go a little bit into you would mentioned earlier that you know, helping others. So from that pivotal point in your life, of course your life shifted obviously. Then you started into hell seeing others and caring about others in that, can you go more into depth of that, because of course, that led you to write your book, which took many years. And you did find it completed. And that is a journey all in itself. So if you can go into that aspect of your life now.

Sure. It's interesting, because, because as we grow, and as we change, and as we move our lives forward and worry about this part of us, or pay attention to this part of us, it's almost paradoxical. But we, but we tend we can, we can lose interest in ourselves at that point, you know, we can lose interest in oh, I need this, and I need that and please, you know, take care of me and blah, blah, blah. It's just how that process works. That's how it worked for me. So. So once that started to happen for me, and it takes a long time, and it's not a conscious thing, it's just, it's simply, can I, can I give somebody a smile? When I'm walking down the street? Can I can I help a colleague at work, can I lend an ear to somebody can I can I forget about myself long enough to pay attention to helping other people. And that is, it's such a powerful thing as we, as we lose interest in what we think we need. And to me, it ties back into faith, you know, it ties back into knowing that I am being taken care of. And, and, and I will say this, that, it doesn't matter what's happening in my life outside of me, I know I'm being taken care of. And so that's a powerful place to be, and that's a powerful place to, to live from in the world, because then I can help others. And I don't look at it, like just helping, you know, just people who are suffering from addiction, or, you know, that kind of thing. It's, it is as simple as, give a smile to the person who's checking me out at the grocery store, you know, strike up a conversation with somebody at the gas station, just chat, you know, like, those kinds of things can change a person's day. But then there also came a point where, and this was 20 years ago or so. So I was relating, I didn't get married till I was about almost, I guess, 20 years sober. So I was talking to my, I believe girlfriend or fiancee at that point, and I was relating some story or, you know, some crazy thing that happened. And, and she's looking at me, and she's like, you know, I don't see it. You're not that guy. You know, you're, you're, there's a lot wrong with you. You're not that guy anymore. And, and, and so my response to that was will remind me to write a book someday. And, and so that was how the whole thing started. But then it took me another almost 19 years to to, to actually write the book. And and over that 19 years, I probably wrote three paragraphs, and I said,

Did you dabble here and there or did? Yeah. Okay. Okay. And then when you actually sat down to write your book, how long did it take you to write your book?

It took me it's somewhere between two and three months to get it written. And then within five months, I had two books written so Wow, anybody who thinks I'm not, you know, a nut job. I got news. I can just grab things. And that's, that's how I'm built. And that's how I am and but it was a wonderful, cleansing, beautiful process, because because once I started and committed to doing it, I sat down at the computer and I'd sit down for hours, and it was just such a beautiful, just these things just kept coming out and things that I didn't remember and and it was it was wonderful. So So yeah, it was two or three months to write the first one a total of about five to write to and the second one's actually coming out toward the end of July. So you

know, you talking about how long it took you to write your book and it was just a beautiful experience. Just by you saying that it brought me back to the memory of what I wrote sat down to write wrote my book and it's so funny when you would set about you know, sat down at your computer and you would write for hours. And that's exactly how it was for me, because it took me under three months as well to write my book and it just flowed through me. And you know, going back to those times, or whatever, it was so therapeutic. But I didn't realize that at that time how therapeutic it was, it wasn't until months later. Because my whole intention when I wrote my book was to just help one person, that's all I wanted to do. I just wanted to help one person that was going through that exact same experience that I went through, and anything that I could do to help them. That's all I wanted. And it wasn't until after my book was published, and you know, everything was going on in my life that I realized, like, Oh, my God, it did, it healed me so much. Because of the things that I'm going through right now, I would have never been able to do. But now that I've cleansed out my soul, and I'm on my journey, I'm strong enough to handle these things that are coming at me full force that I would have never ever thought would have come to me that way. Right? So what were you the same way as well, too?

I would say that, for me, and I don't, I don't know the effects, you know, what's going to happen over the next few months. So my book was published in officially in November. That's kind of what it became. I think the published date is September 26. But, but there was a period where we were doing some, like launch team stuff. So it became public, November 7. And so it's been out for a little bit, but I feel like most of it was, was kind of like, just felt so good to write for four hours, or five hours, or whatever it was. And, and so for me, I think it was more immediate, but but I don't know how that's going to translate. You know, six months from now, a year from now, in terms of how that sort of helps me clean out some of you know, whatever might still be wreckage in there. I just I don't know. But, but I know in my sobriety, so many things have, I should say, recovery. I know in my recovery, so many things over time, that didn't make sense. You know, six months later, a year later, five years later, whatever. It was like, Oh, now I know what they meant. Yes. And that's such a fascinating thing to have happened because it comes out of the blue. Yeah,

yeah. Yeah. And that's all a part of the clarity. And you can see why those things had taken place at that particular time. You know, and that if something repeats, you're like, Oh, okay. No, this is this is where, you know, I've learned the process. And this is where I'm being guided. Yeah, it's, it's just, it's so amazing. It's so amazing. So now let's get into the name of your book books. So if you can, please share, share, don't you know what, we're not going to go there right now? Nope, that's going to be at the latter part of the interview. Because I'm going to ask you the question now through that whole journey that you went through, what is it that you learned the most?

Well, it actually has to do with the title of my book and I'll just tie that in if that's okay. So my I decided once I got sober that I wanted to play basketball and I wanted to move that forward and I didn't get a hold of the the original school that got a hold of me but I I contacted another school a smaller school in Michigan and I ended up actually wanting to go to college so I did that. And you know shoe spring shoestring budget at best no money and coach I think helped me get through because I was I entered in on academic probation because my grades in high school were terrible. And so anyway, it all worked out and a few months into college, I had this sponsor and and he said to me as I was because I grew up with the walk it off, shake it off, you know, you're not hurt if you're not bleeding out kind of thing. Whatever, just be tough. I grew up, you know, to be tough, and that's what I was taught be tough. So okay, and wrestle with problems and you know, grab everything by the throat and deal with it and that sort of thing up suck it up. Suck it up. Yeah, no pain, no gain. Yeah. So, and that's been a part of my life since that time for forever, but I've gotten a lot better. But so so my sponsor said to me, as I was wrestling with some problem or whatever, just that angst and he could feel it and he could see it in me and he said, Daryl, when you stop fighting, the fighting stops. And that was a that was is probably the biggest moment of, of my recovering sober, newly sober life. And I've carried that with me ever since. And that's why I titled my book when I stopped fighting, because because it's so true, it's everything that goes on is going on in here. You know, all the things, we think they're out there, that are issues or problems, or it's this person, or it's that person, or it's that situation or whatever, almost has very little to do with it. It's amazing how the storm outside settles right down when I settle right down. Yeah, and, and so when I'm not fighting myself, which is where the fight is, that's where the fight is, is me fighting me, when I allow that to settle down, and I find out how to have that settle down. Life changes. So that was, that's probably the biggest, most important lesson I've carried with me over these these years.

Now, that's going to lead into the next question. And I'm almost wondering if it's almost the same advice, what would you give to others that are going through the exact same thing that you went through? What advice would you give them? Daryl?

There's a story that I love. And it's part of my early sobriety, too. And this will be the how do I how I think it's best imparted. There was a Friday night meeting that we used to go to, and it was at the community center. And it was just, you know, all these meetings have the names this this church, that church community center, whatever it is. And so this was the Friday night Community Center meeting, and I'm less than a year sober, and, and I'm hanging out with all my buddies, and et cetera, et cetera. And at meetings, and we go to meetings, some guys really wanted to be solvers. Some, you know, were weren't really that interested, I wanted to be sober, I wanted to grow, I wanted to have a better life, I didn't want to feel like crap anymore. So, so I was paying attention. And there was this gentleman named Jimmy. And he was a fairly slight gentleman, he was older, he's definitely in his 70s. At that time, he was about probably 40 years sober, if not more, and, and we used to look at Jimmy as a deity. And he'd walk around real slow, and he wouldn't talk that much. And, but when he said things, you know, I definitely paid attention. But Jimmy was the guy. He was the guy that would walk around the meetings, and he'd have a coffee pot, and he would fill up everybody's coffee at that meeting. And he was just a very humble, service oriented, you know, just a gem of a human being. And, and so I used to watch him do that. But one of the things that Jimmy used to say is, if you want to recover, if you want your life to be different, if you want to, to move forward in here, you have to learn that you need to stay small. And he used to say that all the time, you have to stay small, which basically means to me, it means I need to be humble enough to be teachable, I need to be humble enough to listen, I need to be humble enough to, to find people who have what I want in here, find people who are at peace, find people who are truly enjoying their lives, and emulate what they're doing. So. So it's truly important. I think it's critical to, to, you know, there's another there's another name for humility, and that I've heard for a long time, and it's it's being teachable. So I have to be teachable. I have to listen, I, I see so many people get into recovery or sobriety. And they think, Oh, I got this. I know what's going on, you know, 90 days, I'm good to go. And it takes a long time. So so if I'm going to impart a message to somebody as they're starting off, please listen, please be, you know, be teachable. And as Jimmy used to say, stay small.

Oh, that was phenomenal advice. That was just spectacular. So thank you for sharing that wisdom with me and also the audience. Now we are down to our final question. Any final words that you would like to say to the audience, and then of course, you have to tell us all about your book, where we can get it at and all of that information, please. Sure.

Thank you. Thank you so much for that opportunity. Shannan. i The name of my book is when I stop fighting. And the subtitle is the unexpected joy of getting my head out of my head. starts with an A. So

my podcasts will get cut off

the unexpected joy of getting my head out of my ass. And so that's, you know, it's, it's, it's my story, one of the things I love to impart, because I think it's really important is, it's not a book that's telling people what to do, it's not a book saying, you know, you need to blah, blah, blah, it's a book that's, that shares my story and the lessons that I've learned and, and you know, just how my life changed over time, based on what people who are a lot wiser than me, told me to do. And I listened to them so. So I would, I just, I think it's important. You know, if you get a chance to read it, if you get a chance to find it. You know, I've been fortunate to have a lot of good feedback, and a lot of the feedback has been, he doesn't say what to do, he doesn't tell us what to do. He just gives us his lessons. And I think that's valuable for folks. So, so I have a website, which is Daryl Dittmer, D A R Y L D IM M E R .com. And that's the place to find links for the book, all of my socials and all that sort of thing. So you can also sign up for my, my newsletter, and I've got a second book coming out, I'm just if you don't mind, Shannon, I'll just share,

you share share with the audience, for sure.

Thank you. So the second book is, so the first one when I stop fighting, the second one is when you stop fighting, and, and the subtitle of that one is the road you're on is your own asphalt. Thank you. So it's, it's more of a, it's, it talks about trajectory. And I use a lot of, you know, other stories that I've had in my life, just to, just to illustrate that, you know, I think we all probably want the same things in life, we want to be loved, we want to love we want to, we want to feel deeply we want to, you know, we want to have financial success, there's a lot of things we want to do and, and I think we all, you know, meet on that playing field. And, and, and those are all things that I wanted to do. And I was fortunate to be able to find many of those things in my life. So. So I'm trying to share how others can, can change the trajectory of their lives and make it exactly what they want it to be.

Well, thank you for sharing and being, you know, on this podcast with me, I've enjoyed every minute of it. And I know that my audience will as well too. But I want to let the audience know that all the information that Daryl shared is going to be in the podcast notes. So if you didn't have a pen and paper, you don't have to worry about it, because you just gotta go into the podcast notes. And you'll be able to see all the information there. And on a final note, I want to say thank you, Daryl, for coming on sharing your story, being a part of my energy and most of all being a part of my journey. I absolutely appreciate this.

Oh, thank you, Shannan, as do I it was wonderful. I enjoyed every minute of it as well. And I know we'll do it again soon. So

yes, we will be just let the audience members know too that if you like this podcast, please like, share and tell all of your friends. And also go onto my website to Shannan mandor.com. On there, you will find out absolutely everything about me on my transformational programs that's available and you can also order my book, How in the hell did I get here as well. So have a wonderful day everybody and thank you for your time and spending your energy with me. Have a wonderful day peace out.

Thank you Shannan.