Darwin

Hello, my friend. Welcome back to the dogs admin podcast. I am glad you're here. This is the show where you learn to let your dog lead. Lead you back to love

Hey, guys, what's going on? So glad you're back. I wanted to talk today about Darwin. This one man has so incredibly and inexplicably. And, unfortunately shaped the way we look at a lot of things. His theory on survival of the fittest, not the strongest, but the fittestwas, it was fantastic, right? It was this whole new way of looking at things. Unfortunately, it was mostly incorrect.

But we've taken what he said, Yeah, that's great. That's awesome. That's badass. Let's do this thing, and turn into something that really doesn't serve us all very well. Really? Does it? You know, being bigger and stronger and tougher than the next guy or everybody. It's, it's basically a load of crap. Right? I mean, if if it worked, you'd be happy. You would actually be happy. Right?

Did you guys know that Darwin loved dogs? He absolutely loved dogs. What do you think would have happened if he had taken his dog? Everywhere? He went with him? What would he have really noticed? What else would you picked up on? So he was actually so convinced of their moral superiority, as compared to humans? Had he started when the first animal rights campaigns? Did you guys know that? I didn't know that before. I didn't do that before. My my publisher actually shared that with me. I thought that was incredible. So think about that. So the guy who posed this theory, actually thought dogs were more morally superior than us. Right? I tend to agree. Partially, because they don't get caught up in these stories. They don't, they don't get wrapped up in all these insecurities, and, and act out of out of fear to, to what's going on around them, right, so and so's not gonna like me, so I have to do this other thing. I have to behave this other way. I love it. Thanks, Darwin.

Thanks for everything. So what about? What about that fittest thing? Right? Or being the strongest? The biggest, the baddest? What about? What about Alpha dogs? The Alpha Wolf. This is another total misconception that people who pose the most of those Alpha theories, were studying wolves in captivity. So if you were in a cage, you probably act a little differently to it. And there's been a ton of research. Since then, that shows that wolves in the wild, do not behave in this, I'm gonna kick your ass way. The Alpha Wolf of a pack tends to let the other wolves do what they do best. Right. So you have all of these different roles in a in a PAC, just like a community. People have different skills. So you do have wolves that are bigger, but they're not out there just kicking ass all the time. You have some wolves who are really smart, but they're not trying to undermine everybody, right? They all come together in their own roles. The Alpha has a presence. They have this energy where they don't have to bully. They don't have to manipulate or cajole, or connive. They step in when they need to, and otherwise let the pack do its thing. It's crazy, right? I mean, what a leadership model. I wonder how we can emulate that. What the heck, right? So why aren't we doing different things around this? Why aren't we taking these lessons? I think because we're so stuck in this I have to be a certain way mentality that we don't even question we don't even ask, you know, how would this benefit my life? How can I be a better friend? How can I be a better partner or husband? You know this? Why don't we ask this stuff? I mean, seriously, guys, what the hell? What a crock of shit that we keep doing the same things over and over Hello definition of insanity and expecting to be happy or it's expecting others to just accept us. And when they don't we get so upset. Well, crap, this is on me to change who I want to be, and it's on you to change who you want to be. I mean, seriously, you know, I, I have to take responsibility for my shit. I have to want something different and be willing to make it happen. Right? It doesn't matter at the end of the day, who told you what or how you were treated by by whom? You know, they were doing the best they could and they are responding to life as they felt they needed to. Okay, right? Drop the shaming, drop the blaming. What about you?

What would prepare you for a better life? From right now? Onward What is it? What would actually help you be happy? What would help you find peace? What would allow you to accept yourself? Hmm. That's a touchy one. Right? except yourself. Everything, every part of every stupid thing. You've done everything that you thought was so shameful or so embarrassing that you would never tell anybody? How can you just accept these things? As tough as tough isn't, I haven't done it. I haven't accepted everything about myself. But I'm working on it. And I'll tell you what, I feel held a lot more relaxed. I feel a hell of a lot more confident, courageous, compassionate. I can give people a lot more room or space just to be who they are. It doesn't mean to learn necessarily hanging out with them on weekends. But I can give them that I can allow them that space, even if it makes me uncomfortable. That's just who they are. Right? People aren't just being people. But it's up to them. To make themselves happy. It's up to me to make myself happy. Right. So what do I want out of my life? Do I want to be the biggest toughest, baddest guy on the block? No. I used to I used to think I had to, you know had full shirt guy syndrome because I'm not a big man. And I thought I had to be as tough or tougher than the guys around me. Yeah, that didn't go well. Like a lot. But I don't have to do that anymore. I don't need that. I'm not worried about the guy staring me down from the other side of the coffee shop, that he's going to come over and want to fight. I mean, it's just ridiculous guys is so freakin stupid. And ridiculous that we're so concerned about having to protect ourselves all the time.

No one's out to get me. Right. No, no one's waiting for me to make a misstep so they can pounce? Yeah, it's alright. I have a good life. And it's getting better. But it's only getting better because I am creating that. I am creating that I am learning to listen, I am taking lessons in sometimes fully, sometimes not paying attention, or paying attention to my dog. What she does what she's trying to show me. She's freaking smart, and Goofy, and a pain in the butt. And that's me, right? I'm a total pain in the ass sometimes. But I'm also fun. And I'm goofy. And I'm loving and caring. And I get that from her as well. And that helps me in my other relationships. Right? How do I take those lessons learned from her and carry them into my other relationships?

It's so simple. It's so simple. The hard part is getting past the stories into history. You know, the relationship with my mom has been tenuous for for a long time, but I didn't even realize that. It's hard. It's hard. And we've been both working to make it a better relationship. So getting buy in from her was just one of the best things I could do. And I don't have that with my dad. He's not able, capable willing, I'm not sure. But he's he's got his waist that he set. And I have to accept that. Right. So it comes back to me accepting the reality for what it is and wanting to do better. myself. I can't expect him to change

Anyway, we'll sign off with that one. You know what to do, grab the leash head out, kick it around, have a freaking amazing day. And just remember, you're awesome. And you're loved. Love you guys. Bye

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