Ep 064: Show The Eff Up!

Ever wonder what success actually means? How do you get it? And how do you keep it?

We all want it yet sometimes it feels only some of us get to have it.

Hi, Teresa and Blair here we are to badass entrepreneurs, best selling authors, coaches and business mentors, who have had success, felt success, questioned our own success and reclaimed it. Let's be real for a hot minute. 2020 has been a roller coaster ride, and many of us to start to wonder if they'll lose the things that made them successful. So we got curious, Ron real about what success is truly about?

Can you put it in a box?

How can you get it?

Can people take it away? Or are you the one with the power?

Does it mean the same to all of us? Or are we the ones that create it?

From PGA golf pros to doctors, CEOs, entrepreneurs and spiritual mentors. We get together to meet with successful people from around the globe to dissect success for vibrant conversations and interviews. Make sure you click the subscribe button on the app store because each week we will drop a new episode to bust through the myths around success and dissect its true meaning.

Welcome back to another episode of dissecting success. It's me Blair Kaplan Venables, and I'm here with Teresa Lambert. And we are here to talk. Hello. We're here to talk about something that we've talked about. But I think it's not a one time conversation. And it's something that's coming up in both of our worlds right now. And it's both manifesting in different ways. And that is the importance of showing up. And, you know, Tracy and I are going to dive into this for a bit. But February 18 2022, my father passed away. I was on Vancouver Island, doing some heart opening therapy, some non traditional therapy, working with my guides, and I had a weird, intuitive hit. So I turned my phone on message, my sister, she told me my dad's health declined. That night, I had a dream he died, woke up the next day and booked a flight to Winnipeg, and I was out of my element out of my home for almost a month. And so I was packed to like heal on the island. So I did not have all my business stuff with me, I did not have all my life stuff with me. And so my life got pretty much turned upside down, not with my dad dying. But with the the way everything unfolded. Spending 10 to 12 hours a day, holding his hand, you know, while he took his last breath for a few weeks. And then a week after he passed, you know, my life was different. But I'm an entrepreneur, and entrepreneurs do not get bereavement pay. And luckily, because I built systems and tools I was still able to show up be I was still able to show up when I needed to and rearrange what I could. And the art of showing up the drive of showing up the topic of showing up is so important. When life is good. Yes, we show up. But not always do we show up when life is hard. And when it's bad. And some of the biggest compliments I get is when I am showing up for something. And I you know, show up and like, be there and I'm present. And people know what's going on in my life. They compliment me, they let me know, wow, like you're showing up like I I'm going to be on a panel for International Women's Day on March 10. I know International Women's Day is March 8, but on March 10, I'm on a panel and we had a meeting last week. And hasn't it's two weeks today at time of recording that my dad passed away. And the compliments and the the feedback I was getting was that they're so surprised them showing up and they thanked me for it. And that's because I choose a life of taking on things that I want to show up for. I want to show up and do these things. I like them. That's why they're in my life. So when life is shitty and hard, I can show up for the things I like. And I guess there's also the duality of that, like showing up when things are not going so well in your business. Right, Teresa?

Yeah. 100% like I you know, obviously, like you've been through some pretty big things like big loss, you know, not just in the past month, but like in the past 12 months, and I've been like by your side through that. And I've seen you somehow still show up when a lot of people I know wouldn't be functioning but you also found a way to be, you know, really letting people in which by the way it takes showing up to like a whole new level because most of us don't like to let you in on the big things like that that are happening in our life. A lot of people don't talk about it. And so you know, for you, you've you found a way to still show up to still be there for your community to still run your business to still, you know, navigate as best as you can while letting people in. And I just want to want to highlight that because I think that, you know, you may see somebody like Blair, who's been new, she's been having a business for like, 13 years, right? Like, you've been an entrepreneur for a very long time, you have, you know, established your place, you're getting big media that wins, like, you know, you have a lot of opportunities. But the thing is, those opportunities are there too, because you're putting yourself out there, and because you are sharing, and because you are showing up. And I think we underestimate the power of that. And we just have this expectation that, you know, whenever we start something in business, that it's just going to work, and people just going to come and people just going to click the link, and people just gonna show up to your workshops. And the thing is, they don't yet like,

they don't like,

ah, like, it makes me like, want to shake everyone. But there was this level of discipline and commitment that you have to bring to yourself to your business to your vision. And that has to be big, like, you have to be committed to it, because it's just not just going to happen. And like Palach just eluded, you know, when I can tell you the deal, I can't tell you how many times I've shown up, for example, to sell, or to talk about my office, and I'm so wildly excited about it. I'm like, This is fucking lit. Like, I know, this program is going to be amazing. And then nobody freakin buys it. And it's so frustrating, right? But here's the thing. Every time that happens, right, like, we get to make a choice, like, am I wanting this enough? Like, do I really want this? Am I willing to show up for it? When people aren't handing me that credit cards and being like, yeah, yes, please. You know, when you offers, I'm selling like hotcakes when you know you you're not at that stage of business yet, where you have established so much trust that people are like, oh, yeah, like, I know what she's doing. I know, she can help me and yeah, absolutely, I'm gonna just you know, every time she has something, I'm gonna buy it, you will get there. But the way to get that is through the discipline and commitment to show up. Because the thing is this. Know, like, and trust, isn't just build by adding value isn't just built by being authentic. But it's by showing people that you are willing to show up consistently. So if you say that you're going to do something people want to actually see that you actually follow through. Because if you say you're going to do something, and you never follow through on things, guess what's going to happen? People are going to be like, well, doesn't have a really seem to follow through with stuff. So I don't know, right? Like the vibe you put out, directly comes back to you. But when you show up with that discipline, you're like, I know this is going to happen. I know and I'm going to show up, no matter what. It changes the game.

You are so good at that. Um, you know, I've been basically alongside Teresa the entire time, since she's left her job at the hotel. You know, our friendship has evolved while watching her build her business. And, you know, recently she's had it was a 10k a week. Like we had a 10k days you had a 10? Yeah, you've had a 10k day 10k A week, we've had a multiple five figure launch together. And that's only in a couple years that this has happened. But in the beginning, you're putting together these workshops, you're so enthusiastic, you're so fucking pumped and lit and showing up to promote it and showing up for it, whether there was one person or 10 people, and it was okay. When you know if you didn't have any, you know, anyone sign up, you just pivoted, you just took that information and you repackaged it. You didn't quit. You didn't cry. Like yeah, there's always that like, twinge of like oh man, but like, we're human. But you just kept going and you kept showing up and look where you are now and it's only been a couple years, you took a business from seven figures to eight business, if I'm done died, you take a business from seven figures to eight figures and like you're gonna you know, you are six figures and I can't wait till you hit seven figures. And then eight figures and you know what it takes, and you're brilliant at it. And what I think is really it's so funny, you're talking took me back to this time. So this has nothing to do with my social media world, but I love yoga. And a long time ago, maybe? I don't know, like 12 years ago. I got certified as a kid's yoga instructor. And I was so excited about it. I did it because I just wanted to like it just was a course that seemed interesting to me at the time. And I started teaching yoga at the Jewish Community Center in Venice. Coover, I was doing kids yoga, and I loved it. And that a yoga studio agreed to like, Let me hold an event there. And I plan this huge event. And it was like a princess Prince and Princess party. And it was like this yoga class to Disney music. And the mat was, at one point a boat in the magic carpet. And it was just like, really, really fun. And I promoted it, but I probably could promote it harder, and I was going on, its personal stuff was going on. So I probably could have promoted it harder. And like, I've never done this before. So I didn't know what I was doing. And no one came. No one came. And I was, you know, I put all this effort in. But no one came. And, you know, me and my like, yoga assistant named softy, prana porcupine, it was a porcupine puppet that helped me teach kids yoga, were disappointed. And what I realized was like, I went about it all wrong. Like I needed to promote this to parents as like birthday party ideas, like you know, and the time has to be right for kids to come. And that the time that the class was scheduled that was given to me that was free. The yoga studio wasn't a good time for kids. And I just looked at what I did. And I reinvented it, and I pivoted it. And if you're wondering nowadays, I do not teach kids yoga. That was a brief, brief experience for me for over a few months. And I loved it. But yeah, like it's, you can put all the time and planning in but you can't control the outcome. You only can control what you do, how you react, how you behave, how you pick your chin up, you know, and I think as marketers, you know, which we all are, if we're entrepreneurs, we are also marketers, we have to promote ourselves. I think we need to shift on how we tell our stories and share like, you know, oh, I've been promoting this showing how I did this and then only X amount of people show up, it's okay to admit defeat, it's okay to show what happens behind the scenes. And it doesn't mean you're a failure, what it does, it makes you relatable. It makes you relatable because you know what, we are not just successes. We're not

100% 100%. And we learned so much from the times when it doesn't work. You know, like you learn something from your time as a yoga kids yoga instructor. You know, you were excited about it. You did it. You promoted it. And in fact, nobody shows up like later, lady, I feel Yeah, I feel you because I've been there. And anybody listening, you've probably been there. And you know, this is exactly the point like you mentioned this, like, it's about how we respond to what's coming back to us. And now you and I and we committed to talking about this more on this pod. We're both into human design. Recently. I'm like a little bit further into it than you but I've been talking about it and then you're like, What the fuck are you talking about? I

went, I bought a book. I bought a book.

I love it. I love it. And so both blend I have three five many gents. Okay. Blair is what's called a sacral authority. I'm an emotional authority. But I will not sell FIM cable getting a double whammy his frustration and anger.

We are we the same person?

Well, we have like different defined and undefined symptoms, but we're the same like energy type. And we have the same profile. Just that like with my emotional authority. I ride emotional waves, you guys and my waves have fucking big and like they come in like hot and heavy. And like Miko Jack once described it like with an emotional farty. It's like, you're being like a spiral staircase, and you're always like, up and down, up and down, up. And it's so true. And so for me, I really had to learn to not make decisions when I'm in a high of a high or a low of a low. So when I put that back to like business, and selling things, or showing up even free workshops, right, they like, you know, people always think like selling like, but often I was promoting incredibly valuable, free trainings and workshops where you could have a wealth of my knowledge. And all you needed to do was show up, coming back to the showing up is all you needed to do was show up, and nobody showed up. And it was frustrating as fuck, and I sometimes felt really mad. I was like, What the fuck? Why isn't this working? And I talk about that a lot. And the question always, you know, pops up, but and somebody I feel like if somebody asked me that once, like, what I think it was not asking if he just stated how brave they thought it was that I share the fact that I've sold things and they're not selling when I help people selling the offers and creating offers, right, but I think that's the exact reason why teaching it, because I've learned what's not working in order to align what's working. But bringing this back to this one piece in our human design, frustration, and anger is not self satisfaction, and peace is what moves you to alignment. So to be able to pause, right, and this is emotional intelligence stuff now you guys like now we're going deep in order to pause. And to reset and to accept right now in this moment, I feel frustrated right now in this woman, I feel angry. What do I need to attend to my emotions? Do I need to move? Do I need to like, scream into a pillow? I love that one. You know, what do I need to do to release? What's going on? And then ask myself? How? Like, in what way? Can I show up? That would feel satisfying. And for me, I love to have fun, which is why I've sort of reframed that question like, you know, what ways can I show up today in my business that feel fun, and then I'll make that decision from there. But it moves me to dissatisfaction. And it moves me back to you know, that peace pot, and that that shifted, because now instead of showing up in an angry, frustrated state, I mean, come on, nobody's gonna buy from you when you show up. And you're pissed off. You know, people are liking your posts that nobody's buying and like, it's just not working, like, your energy is just not in the right place. But when you get yourself back, when you take a freaking breath, when you reset when you tend to need and then you show back up with that new energy of like, yeah, you know what, I'm just gonna have fun with it. And again, I am committed. I'm disciplined. And I know I'm not going to stop, I'm going to keep moving. I know what I want an eight figure business. And I'm not going to fucking stop until I get that. And I don't need the world's validation, to give me approval to continue to move. I don't need the approval from the wall to continue to move. I know, I want it. I've declared I want it, and I've moving towards it in

a way. That is what you're saying, is getting me thinking because I'm on this journey. Well, I'm always on a journey, but healing, professional development, personal development. And when someone you know might question why you share something that they don't determine a win, which there's multiple wins, like you built a if you build a course or workshop, and you promote the shit of it. That's a win in itself, let alone if people show up or not, because that's still content you can keep using. But I think what's happening is triggers people, it's triggering someone. Like what why are you? Not you? But like you out there listening? Why are you so triggered? If a coach or someone put something out there doesn't go as planned? And then they share about their lessons? Like why does that trigger you? Right, like, I think, I think you really need to ask yourself this, because Teresa is showing up as her authentic self, I'm showing up as my authentic self. We're telling our story. And that's why you buy from us, you're telling our story. Teresa started a business from scratch, however many years ago, not very many years ago. And she's making six figures. She took a business from seven figures to eight figures. Without failure, you're not succeeding. People don't talk about their failures, or they're when they're not as successful as they want. Because they want you to think that they're this perfect, but that's not true. It's bullshit. You have to fail forward, like you, you know, you just said in a social media post, but you have to fail. And failure maybe is something we need to redefine, because failure is not something that should be dismissed. And maybe we should start celebrating failures. Because it's like in science, right? You try something out, it doesn't work. You try something new, you know, it works. It's like we're a recipe, you know, you add a little bit of spice here, too spicy. You take that out and you add a little bit of this and that what that's delicious. Business is like a recipe. So why don't we start celebrating and sharing our failures. So one other people don't do what you just did. And two, so people can know how much fucking work goes into building a business because what you see and I actually just made a post about this, what you see is really just the tip of the iceberg and a lot of work goes into the things you don't see. So let's show a bit more of that tip. Show me your tip. I love it.

I love it. That is so good. And like it's also at the heart like if you are wanting to know human design and I'm not a human design coach, but I know some amazing people so like you know if you ever are looking for somebody and you want to know who to reach out for feel free to DM me and I am happy to give you an array of beautiful, amazing people who can help you tap into human design but the line free is all about experience. So if you had to you're like I think it's like body graph.com You can get a free human designing thingy. Maybe we can put it in the show notes plan and then we'll we'll have a link because I think it's kind of fun and like I've always loved knowing I don't know. But it's probably again, this experience piece. But for us, embracing failure is the number one thing that will help us move forward. And that's one thing I shared on my stories. And it was a download after I moved was about like fail, fail hard, fail with grace, and then break it all and then pick up the pieces and create magic from the pieces. And that is literally how I'm building my business. And I will break shit purposely, regularly, so I can build it back up. But a beautiful thing that that came with that as well was I think she wrote it in her book. Everything is figured out double Marie full folio, and she defined to fail. So just a word fail as a full good acceleration in learning. And that VD stuck with me.

That's an acronym. Yeah,

yeah, it's the acronym. So I love it all. Like, I think there's a there's another one for it like, false. Like that's for fear. Nevermind, I'm not going to bring up right now. But the thing is, right, like, we can actually like embracing this idea of failing forward. So the more you fail, to further and foster, you're actually going to be moving ahead as long as you're willing to learn, which is why I'm such a sucker for reflection. And like, I will like talk about it until the cows come home.

You know what, what you're saying is great, too, because I was in yoga, a yoga class, and I just made a post about this, I post basically post all my thoughts on social media. And the teacher was saying, like, because we were in a balancing pose, if you're wobbling, if you're not steady, and you're struggling, that means you're getting stronger. And that's so applicable to business. Because when you're wobbling when you're not succeeding, you know, when you're, when you're shaking, when it's hard, you're strengthening. When you're failing, you're actually succeeding. And I yeah, I think this this is such an important conversation about, you know, coming back to the beginning, where we talked about showing up, like, first of all, design a life and design a business that you want to show up for, whether you have zero people showing up into your world, or hundreds of 1000s and anyone in between. But if you aren't showing up for your business, why would someone else, right? And I want to life that I'm going to show up for I am like, you know, Teresa said a sacral, I have to go with my gut. If I haven't, I've learned if I have an intuitive feeling, I follow that even if I don't know where it's going, like I did intuitive hit when I woke up from that human mold. My dream of that my dad died out my healing weekend, my gut said, get on a plane and go to Winnipeg. And that gave me two more weeks with my dad. That has nothing to do with my business except everything to do with my business. Because I am who I am. Because of my father. He was an entrepreneur. He has been the catalyst for the starting of the global Resilience Project. And while there, there were days where I brought my laptop and work beside him because I can there are days where I cancelled absolutely everything I did, because I can. There are days where I had Teresa, you know, do an interview where she did when she didn't want to interview without me, because I couldn't be there with her for the podcast, because I was choosing to show up for my dad. So where are you going to show up today? I love that. I love that. Well, you have anything else you want to add? About showing? I

think it's just like how do you want to define your showing up? You know, like, take some time after you've listened to this sit down. And and like take out a like pen right now. And write down this question. What does showing up mean to me? What does showing up look like in my life to me? What will showing up? Open up for me?

What's the worst that can happen if I show up?

I think those are full juicy questions. Dive into them. Dive into them. And if you do, and something juicy comes up, head to your social media, head to Instagram posted on your stories. Let us know what's coming up and post and tag us at Blair from blend and at Teresa level coaching and tag us and we'll reshare it but do this work. Do this work show up. Show up for yourself. Yeah, don't do it for us do it for you. But if you showed up for this podcast, show up for yourself. You know, the world needs your gift. This was such a great Great conversation, Teresa. Oh

my gosh. I love jamming with you. I missed this. I wasn't happy. We're back. We did it. We did. Okay. Thanks for tuning in to another episode of dissecting success. I appreciate you for showing up three said appreciates you for showing up. Until next time, peace.

That's a wrap for another episode of dissecting success. enjoyed this episode. Make sure to subscribe to black Hebron, Venables and Theresa Lambert's podcast dissecting success on the App Store. And follow