You are a role model whether you think so or not | DFS 333

Jennifer, welcome to Destin for success.

I'm your host. Jennifer Takagi, and today I want to talk about

something. Where are my notes? Nobody knows. Here they are. I

want to talk about the fact that you are a role model, whether

you want to be or not, or whether you think you are or

not, you're being watched. Everybody's watching everything

you do. I I had somebody in my office one time who never got

selected for promotions, like things would come up, and this

person was not selected. And one day, I happened to be speaking

to another supervisor that she had shown up on their list to be

promoted and never had. And I said, Hey, you know, is there

any particular reason that this keeps happening? And the

response was, I hear things around the office, how this

person interacts with other people, and I just don't need

that in my division. And I thought it was very interesting,

because although we were somewhat of a small office. We

were also very divided, very separate. Our work didn't

always, you know, cross paths. So it was interesting to me that

somebody like knew that, that they knew that, for me

personally, one time there was a position I really wanted, there

was a big reorganization going on, and there was this position

I really wanted in the reorg, and the way they were doing it,

I could just be slotted into it. I didn't have to apply or

anything. I was just going to be moved over. It was a lateral

transfer. And one day, a gentleman who again, worked at

the other side of the building, came up to me and said, Hey, do

you have a minute? Can we go talk in the conference room.

Sure our offices were always very open. There was virtually

no privacy anywhere. So we went in a conference room, and he

said, I'm on the committee to help reassign people to where

they're going to go, and I've really been advocating for you

to have this one position. And I decided, before I went any

further, I should ask you if you even want it. And I said, Yes.

How did you know? And he said, Well, I didn't know for sure,

but I just thought you'd be really good at it. And I was

stunned, like, how did he even know what I did? Like we were

opposite, into the building, we were in different departments,

so that at a pretty young age of my career really showed me, told

me, demonstrated that people know what you're doing, whether

you're thinking that they're watching you or not. So you

really are that role model. One time, I was flying to

Washington, DC on Easter Sunday, because that was a good move.

And I knew there had been tornados and storms overnight,

but I didn't really check the weather, because I typically

don't, and I was reading the Game of Thrones book series, and

if you know anything about those books, or over 1000 pages a

piece. So I I'm at the airport, and I have my Kindle, and I'm

reading away. And I don't know at this point what time it is, I

just everybody gets up and stands to get on this American

Airlines flight to Dallas, and I just stand up with everybody

else, and I don't really know what's going on, but I get in

line, and one of the gate agents comes up and hands me a little

card, and I said, Oh, I'm sorry. What is this for? And she said,

there was a tornado in Dallas this morning, and most of the

flights have been delayed, and your our flight out of Oklahoma

City is late, so you might miss your flight. You need to call

this 800 number. Oh, okay, so I call the 800 number, and it's

very pleasant. Person says, Oh, you've been rebooked at 7:30pm

and I said, Oh, great. Okay, thanks. And I hung up. So I get

to Dallas, and I'm supposed to, this is before everything was so

automated. I'm supposed to get in the customer service line and

get a new boarding pass. So I stand in this long line and

people are upset, and it's Easter Sunday, and they're

trying to get home, or they're trying to go visit somebody.

It's just crazy. I just, I never knew Easter Sunday was such a

big travel day. So I'm standing in line, and it's finally my

turn, and this whole time I'm reading this book, I'm just like

engrossed, and I get to the ticket agent, very nice man, and

I. Did my boarding pass, and I said, I'm going to be your

easiest customer all day. I just need you to print me a new

boarding pass for my 730 flight tonight. And he goes, Oh, okay,

clickety, clickety, click. You can hear him click it away on

the keyboard. And he said, ma'am. Your your flight is for

tomorrow at 730 Not tonight. You know it? Oh well, I'm no longer

your nicest, best passenger, because I have to be at a

meeting in the morning at 10 o'clock in Washington, DC. So I

need, I need a flight today. And he went, I don't know, clickety,

click, clickity, click, and he goes, I have you on a flight at

1030 tonight. And he hit print. I had a ticket, and I got to

Washington, DC at like, you know, one or two in the morning

and but I made my meeting on time. I'm pretty sure if I had

gone up to that desk and acted a fool and been a brat, I probably

wouldn't have gotten that boarding pass, and I'm never

going to know, but I hope that my actions and being cool and

calm and a little bit humorous and light hearted about the

situation might have helped somebody else. As it is, I'm

about to go on a flight in the next day, and there's an ice

storm in Dallas, and there, it hadn't happened yet, but three

days before my flight, they started saying this is going to

happen. You might want to change your arrangements. So I call

American Airlines, and this guy's like, and it was like,

Well, I'm I'm flying on Friday through Dallas, and they're

supposed to be an ice storm. And if you're from any part of the

world where you don't get ice storms, you may not understand

this, but like, when it's ice you can't do anything about it.

We don't get it often enough. We don't have appropriate

equipment, and it's dangerous. You just your car, your

airplane, they just kind of do their own thing because it's

ice. It is not snow. There's no traction being had by anybody.

So I didn't know about that, and he's just kind of clicking some

buttons and, well, I could reroute you through Charlotte.

I'm trying to get to Florida. I can reroute you through

Charlotte. Oh, wait, they're supposed to have storms too. And

he's, he's just like, there's no enthusiasm. And finally, I said,

Well, what if I flew on a different day? And he goes, Oh,

well, let me see what I've got. Can you fly on Thursday? Do you

want morning? Afternoon? Do you want an aisle? Do you want a

window? And all of a sudden, he's really friendly, and I

can't help but think it was because he knows he's going to

get hammered with calls, with people throwing fence because

their flights are delayed, they're canceled, whatever. But

I just hung with him until he was willing to, you know, up his

game and be friendly. It wasn't that he was rude before, but he

wasn't friendly and happy about it. So we we don't know who

we're impacting or how, but we carry ourselves, we put off into

the world how we are, like, there are people, you know

instantaneously, they're in a mood. I had a boss. I could tell

by the steps it was going to be a rough day. It's going to be a

rough one. Like, I could hear it in the the steps, the the

heaviness of the steps. Uh, other days I'd be like, Oh, it's

probably going to be a pretty good day. That sounds pretty

good. You can pick up on people's emotions and what's

going on, and you can also impact other people's emotions

and how they're feeling in the world. And we forget that we're

role modeling all the time. You don't have to have a title, you

don't have to have a position, you don't have to have a team

that's following you. People are watching. They know what's going

on. I saw this really firsthand, when a couple of people in

higher management positions were not following rules, and their

employees, they were watching, and they built a case and and

those supervisors in one case fired and was found guilty in a

federal court and did prison time, and The other one was

given the opportunity to retire early and go or be fired, and he

retired early. So people were watching.

They think, oh, nobody's really noticing me or what's going on.

People are watching. You're influencing them. You don't have

to have a title to have a powerful impact on people. Mm.

And they recognize it, and they notice it. I was called in one

day and told that I was being given a temporary promotion, and

I was shocked. I didn't even know they were going to fill it,

much less put me in the position. And they had a staff

meeting to announce it, and one of the ladies that was now going

to be on my team, I was now the supervisor, said you couldn't

have picked a better person like I'm so glad you chose her.

She'll she'll have the attitude and mentality to to keep this

all moving forward and going. And I was shocked, send and

thrilled and honored, because I tried to carry myself with a

level of professionalism, with a whole lot of humor and sarcasm

involved. But I tried to do the right thing and and get my work

done, and, you know, basically, be a good steward with the

position I was in, and I went on and I was a supervisor, I don't

know, eight or nine years before I retired, and like, I got a lot

of satisfaction out of that. I really enjoyed leading people

and being in a an actual position versus just a quasi

position, because I ended up leading a lot of teams and a lot

of projects without the title. And you can and you should,

like, we're all called to leadership of some sort, and it

just depends on where it is. Is it in your kids school? Is it in

your office? Is it in your church? Is it in your

neighborhood, your neighborhood association? Those need a lot of

help. I'm not active in mine at all, but there are people that

are and I'm happy for that, but people are watching you. They

know what's going on, and they see how you show up and when you

choose to leave yourself with integrity and schedule your day

your life, whether it's a tight scheduler, a flexible schedule.

It doesn't really matter, but when you live up to the things

that you say you're you're going to do, other people notice and

other people see it, and if they weren't thinking they were going

to do it, it empowers them to make that choice. When I was in

high school, I just took the next class. I never thought of

it any other way. I just took the next class. I was in seventh

grade, I took seventh grade math. I was in eighth grade, I

took eighth grade math. I was in ninth grade, I took Algebra One.

I was in 10th grade, I took geometry. I was a junior, I took

Algebra Two. My senior year, I took trig, Algebra three. What

nobody bothered to tell me is, I think after geometry, I didn't

need any more math, like I could graduate high school at that

point. But I didn't know. I just the other people in the school

that I was friends with, and they were super smart, way

smarter than me. They were taking these classes, and I just

took the next class and the next class and the next class, I was

following them, and they were being leaders, and it led me to

take all the classes I needed to be able to get into college. I

don't I didn't know any different. I just took the next

class because I was doing what my friends and other people

around me were do, are doing and were doing. So you create a

ripple effect, and and people see it, and they take notice.

And the question is, how do you want to show up in the world?

You're being watched. You're setting an example. But you have

the ability to choose right now, how you want to show up, how you

want to show up in the world, how you want to show up for your

family, for your partner, your kids, your relatives, like who

do you want to be? How do you want to show up? I was teaching

a class for the great state of Oklahoma, and it was a

leadership class, and at the first break, this woman came up

to me, she was in tears, and she was like, I'm a terrible

supervisor. I'm just the worst I'm not doing any of this stuff.

And I said, it's okay, you have the ability to do better

tomorrow. And thankfully, most of us do have an opportunity

tomorrow to do better and to be better. And in one of those

classes, somebody put on the evaluation. I think she thought

she was being very negative, but she put she's just too perky for

me. About me, and I thought, I'll take it. I'll take it. I'll

take perky, rather than being Eeyore and gloom and doom trying

to teach a class and keep people's attention, that was

even a two day class, so two solid days of me. It's a lot

people. I'm just telling you. And I'm glad I kept them there.

I had 36 people in that class, I think, and for two solid days,

and most of everybody else appreciated the perkiness, and

then I was upbeat versus let's go through the material. So it's

your choice. How do you want to show up, you are a role model.

If you didn't know it, I just told you, boom, you're a role

model. I just I deem you that because you are and you get to

choose how you want to show up, if you would like a little help

with this and finding out, like, where you might be able to do a

little bit better, have a little more focus, book a discovery

call. The link's in the chat, not in the chat. I'm so used to

chatting in zoom rooms. Uh, the link is in the show notes.

You're already on your phone, so you can click the link and book

a call. Um, also get my 12 minute gift. And it's 12 minute

gift. Com, Anna, I have an audio series on 12 minutes to win, I'm

Jennifer Takagi, and I look forward to connecting with you

soon. I'll stop the video at some point, like if only hope.